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I've been suffering from daily DR for about 3 months now. Sometimes it only last a few hours, but most days it averages 12 to 16 hours and some days it's there when I wake up and there when I go to bed.

I'm not exactly sure how it started, but I've had some fairly traumatic experiences with SSRIs and benzos I've been prescribed for generalized anxiety disorder. One of which was a span of 10 days where I had become so dependent on Xanax and was having such a terrible reaction to Prozac that I was only eating an apple and a half cup of mashed potatoes each day and don't remember most days. The DR didn't start then, however. It was a good two months after that when I had been on Lexapro and Klonopin for a good two months already to help with the Xanax withdrawal.

I've been off all medications now for about 2 months. I slowly weened myself off the Klonopin and stopped the Lexapro cold turkey with my doctor's blessing since I was on such a low dose and neither were making the slightest difference in my symptoms and were likely exacerbating them. Since coming off of them, however, the DR has gotten a lot worse, although many of my other symptoms have disappeared. I'm seeing a therapist for my anxiety issues who doesn't seem to have much of an understanding of what I'm going through with the DR. He keeps telling me he doesn't understand why I'm dissociating when there's no anxiety or clear trauma present.

Some days I just go on with my day with a positive attitude that the DR is just going to come along with me. Other days, though, I go into a deep despair that I have no hope of ever getting better and the DR will be with me my entire life. Like I've lost the life I once knew and am doomed to live with the DR and the constant emotions that are coming with it. I also feel like my therapist's reactions and confusion about the whole thing aren't making me feel any more hopeful.

I've never reached out to an online community for any problems in the past, but my therapist says I need to get better at confronting my difficult emotions and talking to people about them. I've tried talking to my family, but it's obviously really hard for them to understand. This is hugely out of my comfort zone, but I felt like I needed to go somewhere that I might be able to find some encouragement from people who understand what I'm going through.
 

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Sounds to me like your therapist is pretty awful.

After all, someone who has spent years studying strange psychological issues doesn't understand your DP/DR or the emotions that accompany them, or why you are dissociating. Yet (s)he tells you you need to talk about these emotions with people who couldn't begin to fathom what this feels like?

This is what bothers me so much about DP / DR and the "mental health system." Its the shit that comes from our weird style of thinking that should be the raison-d'etre for the existence of the field. We should be the FIRST people that therapists look to try to help precisely because of how unusual and isolating and incomprehensible it is to "normies".

Instead, they seem to only be interested in normal problems that everyone has, which basically just makes them prostitutes for the mind (they do something that anybody can do, but benefit from discretion or from people who can't get emotional support without paying someone for it).

Ok, rant over.

Welcome to the community. I hope you find the support you are looking for here!
 
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