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My DP/DR story

961 Views 1 Reply 2 Participants Last post by  Cedric
Hi all,

I'm a 5 year anxiety sufferer and for the past two months, an almost constant DP/DR sufferer. I actually had some of this as a kid/teenager but miraculously these symptoms went away for about 10 years and returned back in 2015 with my first quarter life crisis of sorts. I'm not 100% sure this is that, but based on stories I've read here I feel my symptoms match up.

Primary symptoms:

  • Hypersensitivity to light (Colors pop, colors burn in, fluorescent light just sucks. Going to stores is not an option anymore)
  • Eyes feel "Dim" (Hard to explain as it's not actually dimming but it feels like they're about to juts stop working and black out)
  • Hypersensitivity to sound (like someone cranked the treble up and I'm constantly in high fidelity for every sound, every word)
  • Overwhelming head rush sometimes when all of the above happen. It catches me off guard and while It's not a seizure, I would explain it like it was (however I can remember, and I'm in control, it just absolutely sucks to have happen). It feels like I'm going to lose control and instantly black out but it never happens. I will feel dizzy and spacey like I'm on a boat and I'm learning how to walk. I've had vertigo attacks in the past and this is not vertigo from what I can tell.
  • A slight feeling that my eyes are deceiving me. Objects looking different, yet the same. sometimes I question the reality of a situation because of how it looks in my new lens, while fully knowing it's all real. I feel pain, I have moments of joy, and this is not a simulation, but damn if that strange out of sorts feeling isn't strong!

Secondary symptoms:

  • Panic attacks from these sensations
  • I get hot very often, usually brought on by anxiety. A catch 22.
  • Sleep sucks
  • Depression is at an all time high. NOT suicidal, but I am miserable living like this. I think existentially and without purpose, even though outside of this, all is well in life. I have a job, we have money, a roof over our heads, etc.

I'd appreciate any support as I have many engagements to go to and I've been stuck in my house for almost two weeks now. It's draining :(
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