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Memory flashes

4215 Views 21 Replies 9 Participants Last post by  Manof_theFuture
I've been getting all kinds of different reoccuring memory flashes of events, or people and things I havent thought about in a very very long time. It's really strange and hard to explain 'cause I've never had it happen. If you are familiar with this kind of thing; do you know if it's common with DP/DR or is it possibly another benzo thing goin on?
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It isn't from benzo withdrawal. In psychiatric terms it is called primary process regression. From what i understand from tlaking to Janine, and I am no expert, in DP states our minds exist in reality, but some aspects of our functioning retreat into the dream centers of our minds. This is why we can function normally, but we feel like we are in a dream. As such, we get horrible memories from years ago. Memories of random people, things, dreams and events we would have otherwise never thought about again. We feel like we are sort of reliving earlier time of our life. I find this the most troubling and frightening symptom of this illness. I don't know exactly why the brain does this, or what it is looking for. If I were to guess, it is the brain's way of purging out the trauma we have stuffed away into our subconscious when we were younger. Trauma we dissociated from earlier on in life. By the brain "revisiting" these random memories, and making the sufferer conscious of them, it creates a highly emotional response within us. I think we need to grieve these and hopefully heal from them.

Do these memories make you feel emotional? Do they provoke an emotional response of either sadness or anxiety?

I get the music thing too. The music at times seems too intense, like it punches me right in my emotional core. It's really wierd.

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I also have been having feelings of extreme inadequacy that i used to get at school, like when you dont fit in and are worthless
Yes, same here. All of my regression experiences come from my time in grades 1-3, and a few other times as well. I remember those times being really hard times for me. I went to a religious school, and they prided themselves on "helping" students, and would say things like "We never give up on our kids." Well, they did this though spanking and relentless punishment (within the laws of course) for the "bad kids". I remember times I had to go to the principle's office to get spanked. And he was a big guy with a big leather belt. Who would have known that those daily whippings would cause something like DP later in life? I was just a kid trying to be heard, that's why I acted out. But they were too inverted to even think to ask what was wrong. There were other factors of course, but this one just comes to mind. That's interesting how you noticed that Ali.
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