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Does anyone else have a disturbing feeling related to their memories when in a dp state? It's so hard to describe exactly what I feel but its like my mind is constantly going back to memories from the past to try and make sense of myself. Then when I remember things I get such a bad feeling like I'm coming to some terrible realisation about myself but I don't know what it is. The memories themselves are not of anything traumatic or bad but I get such massive anxiety and dread related to them. It also feels like I can remember having dp and anxiety in the memory yet I don't think I actually did. Then I get a scared feeling that I've always had dp, even though I know I haven't . My memories from young childhood feel especially strange like I wasn't living in the real world then and like dp has always been there even though I wasn't aware. Everything has a surreal quality in my earlier memories and just a horrible feeling like my inner core or self feels really weird. It's so horrible and scary :(
 

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I feel that my memory is not my memory or it feels that it was a dream.
I also feels that i have always been in DP but its only a feeling.
 

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YES! I get deja vu all the time as well, and feel like I'm being launched in and out of memories and I can't stay in the present.
 
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I get this too
I've made a few post about it before , at times since this started i will get a feeling of not being present,like im stuck in a past feeling or memory .
There's not many post on here about people having this with dr dp but i have found a few .
 

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When I was in the worst of my dpdr my brain was constantly focused on the past. I kept relieving memories over and over, they weren't even significant memories just random things. It made me feel like my brain was stuck in the past and I couldn't live or be content in the moment. It was definitely strange and uncomfortable. However, that has passed for me since I started recovering
 

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Yeah I just find that my memories of my past aren't very detailed; and as time goes on I can't seem to remember there chronological order. I have barely any recollection of what I was thinking or how I was feeling emotionally in most of my memories. They seem to be like a movie that I am watching when I look at my past.
 

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Yes! Even if it is no bad memories, I get anxious and some kind of electric feeling when I think back on memories.
Like a panic attack because "im still this person " but it feels strange and dreamy.
 
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