Every day I've been listening to certain music that brings me back to a time before my emotional trauma. When I do this I feel the full range of emotions I used to feel. They were so powerful. I actually feel emotions connected to my memories. It's beautiful. Those times were beautiful. I felt so god damn alive. When I open my eyes and take my headphones out, the dullness of the moment hits me. I want to get back there and I know I can, I just need to find people to talk to. I need to cry too. Can't really do that around my roommate though.