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The highest understanding I have about meditation is that there must not be a search, or else it isn’t meditation. Because if you are seeking then you have already found what you sought. You identified something that you want but don’t have and so there is separation. There is a jump in time between what you have and what you want to have. True insight does not require identification of goal, time interval, and achievement. “Seeing”, as Krishnamurti puts it, is timeless. It is without division, with no beginning or end. It is just insight, seeing the truth of it.
 

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Meditation makes me feel worse, whenever I close my eyes I am in a totally black void. I have zero connection with my body or myself. I have no focus point, which makes me even more detached. Short periods of meditation is beneficial for me but too long no.
 
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