[coolwhip27]

I can be such a dense, unloving and hateful person, and who I am being has everything to do with my own suffering. I’ve become more and more disgusted with myself and my self concern, having a lack of empathy and being unable to give because I’m so wrapped up in my own suffering. I’m not beating myself up but it’s important to observe what’s happening inside. It’s important to understand, if you have no love for anything you have no life. Some have challenged this fact (out of unawareness) in the name of pleasure, in the name of self satisfaction, anything they can do to make themselves feel good. Not everyone is all bad, most aren’t. But self concern makes for self torture, it’s not the only cause but everything that plays a part is relevant. Meaning in life without love is dead because then you’ve traded a large portion of life for something much smaller and more superficial. Depersonalization doesn’t help, feeling disconnected from reality literally alters our perception. Our relationship with what’s real is dulled down, life loses meaning, there’s a lack of the feelings that used to make up your connection with the realness of life which is what feeds your dopamine receptors and fills you up with good feelings. How real and profound reality really is, is blurred and greyed and gets lost because you’re confused living with this disorder. You may become unaware of who you’re being, and what it means to obseve yourself so that there is insight into who you are. People can analyze everything all they’d like, it won’t bring insight into themselves so that they learn what it means to suffer, what it means to be happy and full of meaning etc. They believe what they’re analyzing is separate from them, so they think it might bring truth. But, whose analyzing isn’t separate from the analyzations that are made. The psychoanalyzer gathers what they do because of who they are too. So the analyzer would need to be analyzed aswell. This probably sounds vague and irrelevant but I assure you, if you understood this, you’d know it’s not.

This is my last post for a very long time, I need to leave. I wish you all the best of luck, that’s the best I can do. Be nice to each other. Goodbye.

 

[Trith]

I can be such a dense, unloving and hateful person, and who I am being has everything to do with my own suffering. I’ve become more and more disgusted with myself and my self concern, having a lack of empathy and being unable to give because I’m so wrapped up in my own suffering. I’m not beating myself up but it’s important to observe what’s happening inside. It’s important to understand, if you have no love for anything you have no life. Some have challenged this fact (out of unawareness) in the name of pleasure, in the name of self satisfaction, anything they can do to make themselves feel good. Not everyone is all bad, most aren’t. But self concern makes for self torture, it’s not the only cause but everything that plays a part is relevant. Meaning in life without love is dead because then you’ve traded a large portion of life for something much smaller and more superficial. Depersonalization doesn’t help, feeling disconnected from reality literally alters our perception. Our relationship with what’s real is dulled down, life loses meaning, there’s a lack of the feelings that used to make up your connection with the realness of life which is what feeds your dopamine receptors and fills you up with good feelings. How real and profound reality really is, is blurred and greyed and gets lost because you’re confused living with this disorder. You may become unaware of who you’re being, and what it means to obseve yourself so that there is insight into who you are. People can analyze everything all they’d like, it won’t bring insight into themselves so that they learn what it means to suffer, what it means to be happy and full of meaning etc. They believe what they’re analyzing is separate from them, so they think it might bring truth. But, whose analyzing isn’t separate from the analyzations that are made. The psychoanalyzer gathers what they do because of who they are too. So the analyzer would need to be analyzed aswell. This probably sounds vague and irrelevant but I assure you, if you understood this, you’d know it’s not.

This is my last post for a very long time, I need to leave. I wish you all the best of luck, that’s the best I can do. Be nice to each other. Goodbye.

Hey, of course, please do what you feel is best for you, but I hope you don't leave because you regret things you might have said on the forum. I think none of us are perfect. But if you think it's a good thing to take a break, of course I understand very well. I wish too to feel more love and to be more in contact with people, and I don't feel that the forum is the best place to practice that or to make it happen. For me it's more a place to exchange intellectual ideas, and I think recovery for me includes giving less importance to ideas and more importance to moment to moment real life, and to put the latter in the foreground rather than in the background of my thoughts. I feel this is starting to make a big change for me, and from this perspective you might be the one making the right decision. I also identify with everything you said. Anyway, whatever you do I wish you the best 💪✊

 

[leminaseri]

For me it's more a place to exchange intellectual ideas, and I think recovery for me includes giving less importance to ideas and more importance to moment to moment real life, and to put the latter in the foreground rather than in the background of my thoughts

this is so fucking true. even if we often dont agree with each other. and this shows that im an open minded guy i think. i also can agree with claims which a person is doing with whom i actually often not agree

 

[Trith]

this is so fucking true. even if we often dont agree with each other. and this shows that im an open minded guy i think. i also can agree with claims which a person is doing with whom i actually often not agree

I agree you are! And it's appreciated.

 

[NoDevils]

We shouldn't be too hard on ourselves for feeling inappropriate emotions. I've seen people with depersonalization and depression beat themselves up over this, and it often makes matters worse. Being good to others is about doing right by them. It's a fairly simple process. We don't need to feel love to be good to someone.

 

[coolwhip27]

We shouldn't be too hard on ourselves for feeling inappropriate emotions. I've seen people with depersonalization and depression beat themselves up over this, and it often makes matters worse. Being good to others is about doing right by them. It's a fairly simple process. We don't need to feel love to be good to someone.

I guess I mean the love in one’s heart which is what drives anybody to be a decent person. We don’t need to feel love towards individuals personally I agree. Saying “I love everyone” is just a trick if the mind. But what about the quality of just having love itself inside you, which isn’t dependent on if another loves you.

 

[coolwhip27]

Hey, of course, please do what you feel is best for you, but I hope you don't leave because you regret things you might have said on the forum. I think none of us are perfect. But if you think it's a good thing to take a break, of course I understand very well. I wish too to feel more love and to be more in contact with people, and I don't feel that the forum is the best place to practice that or to make it happen. For me it's more a place to exchange intellectual ideas, and I think recovery for me includes giving less importance to ideas and more importance to moment to moment real life, and to put the latter in the foreground rather than in the background of my thoughts. I feel this is starting to make a big change for me, and from this perspective you might be the one making the right decision. I also identify with everything you said. Anyway, whatever you do I wish you the best 💪✊

You’re right 100%, this forum cant be an outlet with a purpose for recovering. I just need a break like you said. I’m going to see what happens when I’m not focused on any of this at all, I operate in all sorts of patterns, not necessarily bad but I’m gonna break the habits to try make room for new ones

 

[coolwhip27]

this is so fucking true. even if we often dont agree with each other. and this shows that im an open minded guy i think. i also can agree with claims which a person is doing with whom i actually often not agree

Yeah, you’re very non-biased. That may be the most important trait for being on a forum with sharing opinions and ideas.

 

[leminaseri]

Yeah, you’re very non-biased. That may be the most important trait for being on a forum with sharing opinions and ideas.

thank you brother. you are liked