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Discussion Starter · #1 ·

glad to see the board is up again :) I got dp/dr/general anxiety and panic attacks in June of 2011 due to excessive stress and a horrible drug experience. I was immediately prescribed Xanax, on which I stayed for THREE YEARS. I got to my senior year thanks to Xanax, but I believe I would have been even better if I never took it and allowed myself to heal naturally over time, but whatever.

I was on 0.5-1 mg a day (depending). In January it got so bad that I started getting panic attacks even if I took the whole 1mg. So I decided I don't want to be on it. Quick digression: I was on 50mg of Zoloft for a year from Feb 2012 and it helped with panic attacks but i did not want to take it cos of the other side effects and I got electric chest zaps for a week from it.

I am 22, I do not smoke, don't do drugs, try to eat healthy, did some running, and drink beer occasionally. I have been in a relationship for two years now.

I tapered of by taking 0.25 two times a day for two weeks, then started reducing it by 0.25. I did not take one for over a month now. However, I still feel side effects and it makes me wonder when will this hell end? I have cheek muscle twitches, low energy, and I got DP/DR again... I haven't felt it for quite some time. I feel like a child again, I react spontaneously, in situations feel like it's so unreal that whatever I do it won't affect anyone because it's that unreal. I have this weird depression that I kind of battle with and don't want to feel so it comes and goes but this general feeling of the loss of touch with myself, where I have this brain fog and feel like I just can't think properly and am kind of lost. This is either Xanax induced, or I had a fake sense of self for three years. I don't know. I was confident and knew who I am, who others are and how to react. That's all somewhat lost now.

Is there anyone who stopped taking Xanax fully? I need your stories!

I need to know there's hope and a life without medication. I do not want to take any because I know how it alters your brain and does not benefit you in any way. I also want to feel myself, I want to feel myself in my soul and just exist. I try not to listen to my thoughts and just let them flow without reacting. However I'm tired of fighting and I just want to know there's hope :(

My friends are telling me about magic mushrooms, any thoughts on that? I'm not pro drugs but it is natural and I searched a bit, so I feel like it might offer what I need, in spiritual sense. I am not looking for a trip for fun, I need a spiritual guidance towards myself.

Anyhow, that's my story.

Here is a link I found that is really good for anyone fighting panic attacks:

Give it a go :)

· Registered
24 Posts
Don't kick your self for taking or not taking meds. Evaluating their success is very painstaking and I don't do it well. 'Make a journal, etc....' We're DP we don't have TIME for a journal (lol).

If you have DP be really careful of casual dope. I wish you very well.

- RonnieK
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