Usually, i doze off in a decent mood. The kind of mood like "DP/DR isn't so bad, I don't know why i'm freaking out about it all the time" kind of mood. Anyhoo, I have this series is fucked up dreams, which I get quite often, and I find some of them quite entertaining.
Like this one where I was at some random friend of the family's house and I needed to clean the millions of dead bees in the pool. This gets tiresome and I end up kicking his ass because of it. Eventually, I feel sorry for him and help him out of the pool, while I do this I dislocate his shoulder and while I did this I snapped into a lucid state and woke up.
Noone likes to read about other peoples dreams because they're all shite, incomprehensible stories about nothing, so I apologize. Anyway, I wake up into this suicidal state. I don't know what put me there. Its not like a strange dream hasn't woken me up in the past. This has really freaked me out because I really would like to know the determinant factors involved. Once again, i'm leaning towards the fact that my anxiety is totally random and exists with the purpose of surprising me when I least expect it.
At this pace, I might have an anxiety attack while having sex, enjoying a tasty steak, finding buried pirate treasure, discovering a mountain cooler ranch doritos and porn. This does not make sense. Stupid ass malfunctioning robots. I wish these were cyberbrains so we could just find the restart button.