[coco33]

My partner of 14yrs had just come in from work when i was on the site so i decided to let him read MY STORY...MY SURVIVAL. Well he read it and then of course as a non DP sufferer this is what he said;

You've been sick since the day i met you :?
( untrue may i add, we met when i was 18. I got DP when i was 28 )

You seem to forget what i had to go through, why dont you write my story :shock:
( untrue, i do remember how supportive he was and why doesnt he write his own story).

Forget about it and stop taking about it. :x

Well i find this typical. My partner is 42, Im 32. He has never suffered from any kind of sickness in his life to date. I think that my illness scares the crap out of him and he doesnt like to be reminded that im ill but what he doesnt understand is that i experienced something so frightening that i cant forget about it and i need to talk about it. Yes he was there for me but it was me that had to ask him to phone the doctor when i was on the floor practically dying from severe dehydration and it was him that was embarrassed when i was nearly put in the mad house.

Of course i appreciate everything he has done for me but dont you find that people still dont get it...........they still dont understand the severity of it all......arent we allowed to be fasinated by what has happened to us.

 

[terri*]

Ahhh CoCo...welcome to my world, even the 10 years age difference. Mine said all the above,

plus :

"This could never happen to me. I'd just pull myself up by my bootstraps and get over it."

Well, yeehaw, I haven't. If only it were that damn easy, huh?

Sorry for the reception from your partner. Sometimes they just don't/can't/won't get it.

Best wishes,
terri*

 

[Guest]

Yea its one of those things that if you dont have it, you dont understand it. They cant understand how bad it is, because they have not experienced it.

 

[Martinelv]

Deary me. I've come across similar tales so many times. It's sad, but understandable I guess. People who have never suffered this curse have absolutely no idea how crippling it is. Because we show no physical signs of illness, it can seem like malingering, or whinging or whatever.

 

[berlin]

Because we show no physical signs of illness, it can seem like malingering, or whinging or whatever.

yeah and try convincing others when your total lack of feeling makes you as expressive as a dead fish :evil:

 

[Guest]

Hi coco.
I know what you mean.
-clay

 

[enngirl5]

This is why I don't ever talk to anybody about it. Why don't you write his story. I find this amusing. Why doesn't he write his own damn story? It's a support group for you, not him. :roll:

 

[Guest]

ooh yes,Coco I know all about this stuff.
Not all from my partner but from other family members as well.
So sorry that your partner can't be more caring and patient.
It's a hard one.I well and truly understand that often times we are not a barrel of laughs for the other person.

I had years of practice due to a chronic physical illness before I got chronic dp.I learnt to develope a thick skin.
I only talk about my dp with a couple of people,except for here.
I try to keep it to particularly bad days,simply so I can explain sometimes why I'm not "with it" or not coping.
I don't apologies often,I can't help what has happened to me and I sure didn't ask for it.
If I'm only going to cop criticism or any of that pull yourself together crap,I simply don't share how I'm feeling but mind you it works both ways.It sometimes doesn't make me feel all that sympathetic to those people's personal problems.

I think this is one of the main reasons we come here.To be accepted and understood.
We all have one thing in common(except for a fortunate few),this charming disorder called depersonalisation and derealisation.
It's a place we come to express our feelings and know that several other people reading our words will be nodding their heads,saying "aha,aha,I know how you feel".
You will rarely find the same understanding anywhere else.It's just the way life works.

Good luck and all the best Shelly