it's back and i'm really scared

hello everyone,

my name is lori and i was very involved in this community about 5 years ago. I experienced terrible dp/dr along with anxiety and agoraphobia. I found a good doctor and after a few months of treatment with SSRI's and Ativan, I started to feel better. It was a long road, but I finally got to a place of feeling good again and was able to go back to college and accomplish alot of things.

out of nowhere, the dp/dr has come back and i'm scared to death. I know it's because I've had extra stress in my life lately, and there is alot of change happening. My husband and I are moving, and I run a nonprofit cat rescue that keeps me overworked and exhausted most of the time. For the past couple days the dp has been getting worse, and now I'm terrified that I'm going to breakdown and go through this terrifying experience all over again. I feel like I can't handle another episode of this, and that I have way too many obligations in my life to have this happen to me. I'm scared to go back to my pschiatrist because I'm afraid she will change my meds and I am terrified to go through that. The scariest part is that no matter how much I try to talk to my husband about this, it doesn't seem to help, and I just feel like I'm disappearing from reality more and more. I can't remember what I did before to get myself through this. I feel paralyzed and very confused. I also feel like I can't explain what is happening so how can anyone really help me?

This experience is so awful, and I feel so bad for all of the people who suffer from this. I guess I need some words of support and understanding here, and definitely some suggestions on how to get through this, because I don't remember how I did it before. I'm just so terrified of going crazy and ending up in a mental hospital. I feel like it just won't ever go away now that it has started again. It's so damn scary. Please help.