Yes I am hearing ,well more liek thinking a mixed bag of things, sometiems i will think irrantional things like for example if I see soemtimes i will think of an offesive thing in my mind or I will think a racist thought and hear a racist word in my head repeating over and over, despite the fact im not racist, like im listening to a radio channel of hate, but i don't literleely hear this word repeating merely think it like you would when recallign a song you know in your head, but like on a louder frewuncy like it is just about to breek out into a sound but not quite, And this mental noise seems to enter in the back of my head, say like a song would. I also seem to obsess over strange things like recently I have been obsessing over theformer soviet union and communism and lenin, and finding out all the infomtion i can about them, and Im not really sure why I do this becaue I am not a communist and I reconize the soviet union as one of the most repressive and bloodthirsty in recent history, yetr for some reason i feel drawn to the symbology of the union and the history and I obsess about them all the time, maybe it is just me looking for a ideology to look up to or believe in? Im really not sure.
Is this considered an auditory hallucination?
Does anybody else get this symptom with their dp/dr where they don't physically hear a voice in their head but rather hear voices in your own internal dialogue, is this an audotoriay hallcunation or not, or is an audotery hallucination where you actually hear a voice for real, becsue at the moment i am really worried that i might have scitzophenia because I seem to have sevral voices in my internal dialogue , like I said I don't actually hear voices more like a chain reaction of different sounds and voices going on in my internal dialogue, and it feels like I have a fog or a cloud hanging over my head and in my mind, I just pray to god I don't have the scitz, but sometimes recently i have been wondering because my detachment has been really bad and I haven't been able to connect to anyone or thing, I can't even get pleasure out of my favioute music anymore, everything is boring , dull humdrum , I fell like I am waking up in a constant nightmare where I do exatcly the same thing everyday , and am only concious by the narrowest of margins, it is all getting too much to take for me, and a lot of the time I fail to see any point in living anymore.
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It kind of feels like when I get this weird feeling of other entites or voices that I am in a kind of self containted sphere and there are a maltiude of other personalties / aspects of me surrounding me, a lot of the time I do tend to worry that i may have some kind of split personality because I tend to feel or think in about 2 or 3 ways about ojne thing at a time, liek for example I might see someone and then I would get a thought like there a stupid person or I hate them, really totally irrational thoughts with nothing to back them up, then I will start arguring with myself, and at the moment I feel like im going towards the brink again and that I might dissolve again soon, because everything is going , my sense of reality feels like it is dissoliving more and more every day and I have nothing to ground me back into reality.
I think I can undestand what your saying here, soemtimes i think iv'e somehow got access to an uncocious channel of vibration in the air or something, and I feel like I am on a constant acid trip or something , with the visuals that keep manifesting in my mind like kadlioscope kind of realities and visuals, and my spatial awareness just seems totally out there like I have no awareness of my surroundings, I tried to explain this to my doctor but he didn't understand what I meant by having my spatial awarnenss be really spaced out or expanded somehow.kinda like animations/different wavelengths/'flickers'???
Yeh I do really think that it is more like obsessive thing thought patterns as I don't hallucinate or have any magor delsusions, its more like background noise of delusions that I relise as such. Also it seems to be that I have an obsession with having scitozpohenia and it seems at certain points during a month I have a I must be scitz period thta may last a day or so when my dp/dr is really bad, like it has been today.but this sounds to me more like obsessive thinking/ thought patterns than schizophrenia.
Yeh it all seems so compelx though that I keep on going round in circles, on the flipside however the whole dp/dr experience has improved my thinking and phiosophical outlook at life, so if there is anything good I am getting out of dp/dr then I spose it is this fact. Got to look on the bright side sometimes I spose!Yes, what you described is almost exactly like acid. The perception shift though is harmless once its accepted, and can soon become the new reality. As soon as we get to the point where it doesn't seem foreign, then all will be well.
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