[Guest]

I suppose I should introduce myself. I posted on this board under DazzieMae. I droped it because the name was associated with a television show that I was not aware of (my middle name is Mae). I posted on other DP boards as Chikalet. That name I use for neopets and I didn't think appropriate. Yes, I am a neopets addict. Ya gotta have fun, right? I am a mother of two children (who keep me here) and a wife (keeps me gone -Just joshing.)

I first had fleeting symptoms of DP when I was 9-14. I was told that was normal. My oldest daughter has fleeting moments when she "feels like she is in a dream." I used to panic about it, but what good does panicking about something that you have no control over. I wish I had that philosophy over every aspect of my life. Growing up, there was neglect, physical, verbal, & emotional abuse not to mention alcohol & drug abuse in my family. The thing is, I don't blame my parent's. They did the best with the cards that were dealt to them. I love them very much. I had a brain injury in 1980. It was traumatic for me since I was only fourteen. Following my brain injury, I had a couple seizures. I made it through my teen years okay. :?

I got DP 24/7 9 years ago when my youngest child was one. I wrote that because I think it led up to my DP. I won't go into it though. But, I will say that I was sleep deprived for 1 year as I had to feed her every four hours. Once she made it through, I Depersonalized. Fight or Flight, huh?

I am now going through DBT (It is a shoot off of CBT, I guess) and am very sensitive to meds. I was taken off of paxil as it stopped being effective for me. Now, I take Noratriptyline, provigil, and klonopin. I can not tolerate pamelor so my Pdoc is tapering me off and putting me on Lexapro. I take my first dose tonight and am very worried but, excited. I have not tried this one yet. Please pray or wish me luck.

Well, that is the saga of my half-life :wink: story.

-Distorted_Vallie

 

[flowingly]

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. Hope your new meds offer you some relief

 

[peacedove]

Good luck. I have never tried Lexapro... keep us updated. Have you tried Lamictal? I just started that. Klonopin should be helping you out a bit, I'm currently taking that too. I also was on paxil... then I switched back to prozac cuz I thought that worked better for me. But we're all different.

I admire your strength. It's hard enough for me to care for my pets with this illness and you are caring for children. I don't think I could do that.

 

[Guest]

Hi Guy's,

Thanks Peacedove & flowingly for the encouragement. It meant more than you know. I apologize that I didn't get back earlier. I try to limit my time on boards because I tend to get caught up in them if you know what I mean. Does anyone else get self-conscious about laying the true way you feel on the internet for the whole world to see and not getting a response or is it just me?

I haven't any side effects yet from Lexapro. It wakes me up a little as I tire easily. I'm still afraid though. I just gotta make it 2-3weeks and then I'm in the clear.

Peacedove,

I have tried everything possible up to my paxil, klonopin, & provigil cocktail 3yrs ago. Yes, I tried lamictal. I developed a small red spot on my face that looked like a curling iron mishap. I let it go until it started spreading. I was so sure that I fell into that one percent category (or whatever it is) acquiring that disease. Plus, it made my DP/DR worse. I suspect that was from worry since it has helped so many others. As soon as I stopped ingesting lamictal the rash slowly but surely went away. That was a few years ago.
I posted a response to a question about lamictal in the med section and was relieved to be corrected by someone (-can't remember off hand who it was) that ten percent of people who are taking the drug will develop a rash, but not the disease. I am extremely sensitive to drugs. Hey, I wonder why I wasn't to the illegal kind when I was a teenager? Maybe I'll take that question to the polls.

-Distorted_Vallie