[Guest]

Hello folks. I've been lurking here for a few weeks and thought it time to register and ask something about symptoms, or more specifically, the triggers for your symptoms.

First for some background about myself. I'm a 37 year old male that's been living with what I think is DP/DR for at least 17 years. Now, I'm not sure how it started, yes I did use pot, and and few other things as a teenager. However, I'm not sure this was the cause.

Every since I was a young teen, I always had thoughts about infinity, time, and me and how I relate to all this. I remember going into a hyper analysis of me. And I think at some point during this pivotal time in my life, I whent over the edge, so to speak.

Let me explain my symptoms, and when they occur. Compared to some folks here; I may be lucky in that it only happens when I'm alone. I've only had an episode once in public. And I believe I received an incorrect diagnosis from my doctor (Panic Attack Syn). This was a couple years back, already been on and off Paxil.

So, here's what happens, the only way I can explain it. If it were'nt so scary and unsettling, it would be almost comical. You see it will happen when I'm completely alone. Now I have to explain "completely." For example, when I take a shower, and no one's home, I have to leave the bathroom door open. I leave the door open because we have dogs. They hang out by the door. Without the dogs, or if the door is closed, I cannot help but go into what I think of as self hyper-analysis. I start to feel there's no one but me on Earth. Or it will feel dream-like, or I'm not real. Then I get this crazy feeling that I have to run . . . FROM ME!!! More than once, I've come flying out of the bathroom, trying to get away from me. :?

It's like dominos; once I start down the slope, there's no going back. On the flip side, if my minds occupied on other things, sometimes I'll catch myself actually going about my business without the hyper-analysis.

The symptoms recede almost instantly once I see or hear people or any living creature . . . nuts.

Of course this is a major hindrance to career and life. I work in a Lab as a technician. I have to leave a half hour early because no one's in the lab . . . but ME. ARRGHHH!

I can't be with ME, what is this? Is it DP?

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

ME

 

[Sojourner]

Sure sounds like near-classic panic attack to me.

It's normal of course to think about the big stuff, but I know what you mean about taking a shower. Sometimes I put it off because there's something a bit weird going on in my head. LOL.

 

[Guest]

Thanks Sojourner.

Maybe the good Doc was right. It's just that the episodes are so clockwork, predictable most times.

Maybe I need to re-visit the Panic scenario.

I need to be able to take a shower on my own someday.

 

[Da'Burgh]

Start taking your showers with someone. I do.

No, seriously, it sounds like it's anxiety to me. You're setting yourself up for this by expecting to be panicky when you're alone. Plus this is a time when you have no distraction and you are completely in your own head and thoughts. Simply just concentrate on what you are doing (washing yourself, doing your work) and you will keep your mind at ease.

Just to let you know, for some reason showering is often a time of difficulty for me. My shower is black, the water would feel odd, and I was just stuck there in my own mind wandering.

 

[mcsiegs]

For example, when I take a shower, and no one's home, I have to leave the bathroom door open. I leave the door open because we have dogs. They hang out by the door. Without the dogs, or if the door is closed, I cannot help but go into what I think of as self hyper-analysis. I start to feel there's no one but me on Earth. Or it will feel dream-like, or I'm not real. Then I get this crazy feeling that I have to run . . . FROM ME!!! More than once, I've come flying out of the bathroom, trying to get away from me. :?

You just described exactly what I experienced when I suffered from DP (I am DP free for almost 2 months now - a combination of the right dosage of Paxil and talk therapy helped me.

I know what you mean that it is almost comical. I used to go flying out of the shower too in the middle of a panic attack and a feeling that I lost myself in myself. Just know that the feelings subside, and you CAN get better. I did.

Also, I know that if I slip back into DP, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

 

[Guest]

For example, when I take a shower, and no one's home, I have to leave the bathroom door open. I leave the door open because we have dogs. They hang out by the door. Without the dogs, or if the door is closed, I cannot help but go into what I think of as self hyper-analysis. I start to feel there's no one but me on Earth. Or it will feel dream-like, or I'm not real. Then I get this crazy feeling that I have to run . . . FROM ME!!! More than once, I've come flying out of the bathroom, trying to get away from me. :?

You just described exactly what I experienced when I suffered from DP (I am DP free for almost 2 months now - a combination of the right dosage of Paxil and talk therapy helped me.

I know what you mean that it is almost comical. I used to go flying out of the shower too in the middle of a panic attack and a feeling that I lost myself in myself. Just know that the feelings subside, and you CAN get better. I did.

Also, I know that if I slip back into DP, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

Wow, and I used to think I was the only person in the world to experience this. It's still hard for me to imagine that there's other people that have this illness. . . it's so weird.

Are the onset of your symptoms always the same . . . when you're alone?

How did you handle the increased dose of Paxil? What about side effects? I did take it for about a year. I really didn't give it a chance; always told the doc everything was fine. I was too embarassed to really tell what was going on. I figured he would try to commit me. :lol:

Anywho, although I wouldn't wish this crap on my worst enemy, it's still refreshing to see I'm not alone, and I'm not CRAZY!

Just Me

 

[Guest]

[quote name="Da'Burgh"]Start taking your showers with someone. I do.

:shock:

Yeah, not only would I forget about me, but I would forget to take a shower too!!!