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im dissociated with schizophrenia and i cant live like this, cant work, scared people will make fun of me, everything i do is the opposite its like im the devil or something, the opposite of god. im so focused on detail when i put a iphone plug in i always put it the wrong way, when ever i open or close my window i turn it the wrong way, i always do the opposite, i even say the wrong things all the time, am i the devil? i cant connect with anyone

when i was younger i just stayed at home and never had social contact or conversation because i was scared, it all started when i was like 10
 

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Hey, you are not the devil. Trying to socialize can be exhausting for many reasons, and dissociation really makes it way more difficult.

It seems to me that you are trying to be more social, and fortunately not all people will act scared or ignorant, so I hope that among those people you will find someone to connect with.

Take care,

A.
 
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