I'm convinced

I really feel for you man. I know how it feels to be constantly thinking your going mad or are going to develop schizophrenia. I can tell you now that all these things we consider are often due to anxiety. We worry that we may be going mad or that we are brain damaged or that we may never recover. The fact is you are not going mad and don't have schitzophrenia. If you did you would not know that what you experience is different from normal perception. That is why it is so hard for us to live with.
Hope you feel better soon. We all go through the bad times. Try to keep the hope that this damned condition will eventually go away.

Welshlad.

you're not crazy. The more you worry about this the worse the anxiety will get. Just try to ignore those thoughts when they occur. Don't give in to them.

And as for the weed and pills- forget about those. They'll only make your anxiety 10 times worse. If there's one piece of advice I can give you it's to steel well clear of rec drugs from now on. It's the trigger of dp for a few of us on here.

Try not to be frightened of those thoughts. They cannot hurt you. Get better soon.