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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I think i have schizophrenia!! I'm never going to get "normal" again.. All i do is think about shit to the point i feel unreal. I cant concentrate on things because I'm crazy.

I feel like I'm in a dream or in a movie. I feel like I'm going to trip out. I'm going to be lost.

I have constant panic 24/7... :cry:

Ill i do is look up shit online, i read all this shit and i have all of it.
 

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I really feel for you man. I know how it feels to be constantly thinking your going mad or are going to develop schizophrenia. I can tell you now that all these things we consider are often due to anxiety. We worry that we may be going mad or that we are brain damaged or that we may never recover. The fact is you are not going mad and don't have schitzophrenia. If you did you would not know that what you experience is different from normal perception. That is why it is so hard for us to live with.
Hope you feel better soon. We all go through the bad times. Try to keep the hope that this damned condition will eventually go away.

Welshlad.
 

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I went through this part. I was looking up schitz symptoms, thought 24 hours a day I was going crazy.... You are not crazy just in a state of panic and high anxiety. Did you take anything to relax you? You will not go crazy... you need to get something to help you relax. THe ocd part of this illness i crazy but I swear to you man you are going to be fine. Try not to check online so much it just is the compulsion part to the obsession.... The checking makes the obsession important to your brain. The less you check the your brain will get the message that it is not important. I have found that one obsession takes the place of another so don't be surprised if you get rid of one for another. My therapist said when you feel dp/dr, try to make it worse, when you think you are going crazy think it out to the worst scenario possible , so that your brain doesn't think it is to frightening anymore.

Try to find something to distract you from the obsession.

KC
 

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I went through this part. I was looking up schitz symptoms, thought 24 hours a day I was going crazy.... You are not crazy just in a state of panic and high anxiety. Did you take anything to relax you? You will not go crazy... you need to get something to help you relax. THe ocd part of this illness i crazy but I swear to you man you are going to be fine. Try not to check online so much it just is the compulsion part to the obsession.... The checking makes the obsession important to your brain. The less you check the your brain will get the message that it is not important. I have found that one obsession takes the place of another so don't be surprised if you get rid of one for another. My therapist said when you feel dp/dr, try to make it worse, when you think you are going crazy think it out to the worst scenario possible , so that your brain doesn't think it is to frightening anymore.

Try to find something to distract you from the obsession.

KC
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
All my Dr gave me a Buspar. I have had it in the past but it takes a bit to work. He also have me something for my blood pressure and heart rate.

Right now i feel like my heart is going to explode. I wish i could have gotten xanax or ativan or Valium. But no luck. So I'm just going to have to wait it out.

I also quit drinking about a week ago and that i think is making me even more crazy.

I need something, weed, pills...

I need all of this to just stop.
 

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you're not crazy. The more you worry about this the worse the anxiety will get. Just try to ignore those thoughts when they occur. Don't give in to them.

And as for the weed and pills- forget about those. They'll only make your anxiety 10 times worse. If there's one piece of advice I can give you it's to steel well clear of rec drugs from now on. It's the trigger of dp for a few of us on here.

Try not to be frightened of those thoughts. They cannot hurt you. Get better soon.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
I just feel like ill NEVER EVER get out of this shit. I had this in the past and i can remember a day when i was like "I don't even know what i was thinking about" But i don't see me ever having a day like that again.

And yes my first ever time having DP/DR was when i was stoned at the age of 17. Now I'm 31...

I had panic and obsessions before then but i could handle that stuff.
 

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Space I sent you a PM.. But you are def not going crazy , It feels alot like it I know, I have been in the exact place that you are. Don't do any weed or pills that are not prescribed you. If you know that Valium works better for you as it does for me, call your Doc and ask if he will switch you. In any case Take this thing on sec at a time, then one minute, the one hour and then one day at a time.

Find something you have always liked to do and concentrate on that. Even if it doesn't feel normal right now, even if you don't want to do it. DO it. It will start to ground you little by little

KC
 

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Have you seen A Beautiful Mind? He had no clue he was going crazy. If you think you're going crazy, you're not. Do you have hallucinations? To the best of my knowledge, there's no pre-schizophrenia state, so it's very doubtful that you are in that state, and if you don't have full-blown schizophrenia, you probably never will. Also, it usually develops between the ages of 18 and 23--are you in that age range? If not, I wouldn't stress it at all (but I know you probably will, cuz i know how it is...)
 

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spaceplex1111 said:
You're not listening to what people are saying.

You need to stop searching these websites. You will not go insane. I'm so confident of that that if you do, come back on here and I'll write you a sizeable cheque for ?1,000 or so.

- You're in your 30s. About 99% of males with schizophrenia develop it in their late teens early 20s.
- You'd be the first schizo who anxiously searches for symptoms online and worries about having it non-stop.
- You don't have any hallucinations/voices.
- You never have had any hallucinations/voices. Many schizophrenics have experienced these things on-and-off for a long time, sometimes their whole lives, before they experience psychosis properly.
- You know something is wrong.
- You're still coherent. Your thoughts are not confused to the extent that a person with schizophrenia's would be.

I could go on, but I think you get the idea.

At the moment your mind is "filtering" information, online and elsewhere, to make you think you're developing schizophrenia. You have to trust us that you are not. I have been there, about 2 or 3 times. You have to stop symptom-searching. You have to distract yourself on something else. Above all you have to believe that you will not go insane.

I hope it gets better for you soon.
 

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spaceplex1111 said:
I think i have schizophrenia!! I'm never going to get "normal" again.. All i do is think about sh*t to the point i feel unreal. I cant concentrate on things because I'm crazy.

I feel like I'm in a dream or in a movie. I feel like I'm going to trip out. I'm going to be lost.

I have constant panic 24/7... :cry:

Ill i do is look up sh*t online, i read all this sh*t and i have all of it.
You and I sound like we have a lot in common. I have anxiety and DP/DR pretty much 24/7. The problem started on October 27, 1994, after I consumed 3 caffeine pills (Vivarin), had a 12 hour long panic attack as a result and ended up in the ER the following day around Noon.

I keep thinking about the original situation and how badly I wish I could go back and change.

A book I'd recommend for you is "Wherever You Go, There You Are".

Do you work? I do, but barely. I keep thinking about how highly functional I was prior to the day I swallowed those Vivarin. My quality of life has been next to zero for more than a decade.

I'm lost. I have no idea how to reclaim my old self. I might as well have died after taking the Vivarin because 10 years later I'm still constantly psychologically paralyzed and incapacitated.

CBT and medications won't come close to alleviating/resolving the symptoms. I've spent thousands of dollars trying to figure out what's wrong with me, and to no avail. It's frustrating, depressing, etc.
 

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Hi I am new here but not new to dp. I joined this a few days ago for support and what I could offer and also receive. It is nice to not be alone. To spaceplex I wanted to say keep re-reading what assuring things ppl have said and deep breathe. I am sober now also and remember very well the withdrawl and dp kicked in big time. Trust me that duz pass. You are on the right road. I also was convinced of schiz, and my Mom was paranoid schiz! So I was SURE I had it, but I don't. I don't think u do either. Hope u can get a therapist and a support group about the sobriety part. Sending calm thoughts everybody's way. Thanks for all being here and so honest. It definitely feels like hell no denying that. I just did the damn dishes while I felt like I was going over the %^$^^ing edge, and here I am now able to put sentences together 20 minutes later. Think this: I was not brought this far to be dropped on my head, I am not a freak and not alone. I will feel and do better for myself. Keep breathing.
 

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Hey 1A I am in Ohio too, so now I know I'm not the only one in my state, and in this "state". Sorry to hear how this sh*t blindsided you, I'm sure we all feel somewhat ambushed by such a weird "disorder" or whatever. I have months where dp is way way in the backround, and 3 or 4 months ago it reared it's ugly head again so now I'm doing distracting things as much as possible since it seems this is like a relapse--I sure get what u mean about the 24/7, certainl sux it Big time. Glad we can offer something to all eachother.
 

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Space, you need to stop reading up about Schizophrenia or related illnesses. All it is doing it reinforcing your obsession - which raises your anxiety, which then makes your DR/DP. I know how difficult it is - because you want a 'label' for what you are feeling, to find something that might explain how you are feeling. In another way, your obsessional rumination is eager for you to find out horrible possibilities, so as to continue to feed on your fears. Don't let it.

I'd wager that virtually everyone with DR/DP has, at some point or another, become convinced that they are developing Schizophrenia. I know I did. I trawled through the internet, read books on mental illness, and (because there is a paucity of literature on DR/DP) became convinced that I was in the early stages of Schizophrenia. But that's not the case...DR/DP and Schizophrenia are about as far apart on the mental health spectrum as an in-growing toenail and a brain tumour. You are not going 'mad' - not, not not, not, not, not. You can't accept this because, at the moment, you are in a world of horror - and, perhaps, accepting that you have schizophrenia might seem to be an easy way out. Well, sorry chum - you haven't got schizophrenia and you aren't going to develop it. You've got DR/DP/Depression/Anxiety, and you've got to find a way out.

There is always a way out, even if the door is someone in the dark, guarded by a 1001 demons. First off, you need to stabalise yourself, with medication I reckon, and then - when you're a little less frightened and a little more grounded, you will be able to gather your thoughts and strength and start to grope forward towards the door. That's the tricky part of course, but you must try. If and when you do get stabalised a little, don't allow yourself to relax and 'settle' in that state, because sooner or later, if you don't really start to fight, then you'll lose your grip and fall back into the stinking DR/DP pit - trust me, I know.

Good lucky buddy. On the other side of the door is a life worth living.
 
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