Actually I use DP all the time. It started out clearly as a defense mechanism. A mechanism that was triggered by an unsatisfactory life and a few traumatic drug experiences. When I'm in the clutches of DP I also swear that it is an "illness", something that is happening to me. I don't think DP happens to me, I think I create it for very specific reasons. I would rather face some horrific mental symptoms than come to terms with the fact that I am an extremely negative person who has missed out on alot in life and is now socially crippled. I often think, sometimes conciously and sometimes subconciously, that a psychotic state would relieve me from the horror of a life that I feel I don't fit into.
I still think this is serious. DP is theater for me completely, albeit a type of theater that mirrors reality to the point where the suffering I go through IS real regardless of the fact that I bring it on myself.
I'm not posting this to say that you're experience is the same as mine or that DP is not an "illness" for you. I'm posting this to say that even those who bring it on themselves deserve compassion. I don't know if you're doctors are right or not. I believe even if they are right they should still treat you as if you had a serious problem (which you do because DP, regardless of cause, is serious).
I also think you should not simply shrug off their opinions and try to "rebel" against them. Doing what you fear is great and I believe you are on the right track completely. Be proud of that but don't automatically say that you're doctors are wrong. Truly look within yourself, even if its painful, to make sure that you aren't using DP as a self defense mechanism. This is an important step, in my opinion.
I still think this is serious. DP is theater for me completely, albeit a type of theater that mirrors reality to the point where the suffering I go through IS real regardless of the fact that I bring it on myself.
I'm not posting this to say that you're experience is the same as mine or that DP is not an "illness" for you. I'm posting this to say that even those who bring it on themselves deserve compassion. I don't know if you're doctors are right or not. I believe even if they are right they should still treat you as if you had a serious problem (which you do because DP, regardless of cause, is serious).
I also think you should not simply shrug off their opinions and try to "rebel" against them. Doing what you fear is great and I believe you are on the right track completely. Be proud of that but don't automatically say that you're doctors are wrong. Truly look within yourself, even if its painful, to make sure that you aren't using DP as a self defense mechanism. This is an important step, in my opinion.
