Hello, I'm new to this site and I generally want to speak to others who have DP, as I don't know anyone in person that has it.
Basic summary of me
I'm 17 years old and of Chinese descent, I study A Level Maths, Business, Economics and Politics. I have a part time job on the Fri/Sat at a local takeaway. I have 2 older brothers and my mom and dad. I have a beautiful girlfriend that takes care of me. I believe I've had DP for around 7-8 months, from what it was stemmed from I have many possibilities but I'll talk about that later in this post.
Last 7-8 months
To be honest the last 7-8 months have flown by (in a bad way), likely because my track of time has worsened terribly with DP. I believe I started having this feeling roughly around November-December, honestly this really did come out of nowhere I because of my worsened memory I can't recall where/what I was doing at the time when it happened. I told my girlfriend how I was feeling and she said I should get it checked up but at the time I really didn't believe it was a big deal. Throughout January I thought it would of been just a phase of growing up, or that I was just feeling a little unwell. But at the time I was learning how to drive, it was roughly my 15th lesson so I was pretty fluent at the skill, but my teacher explained that my last few sessions weren't that great, I was making mistakes and dwelling about them throughout the lesson which distracted my concentration, creating more mistakes to dwell on and thus a cycle is created. He explained that he believed something was wrong, he could see I was well and he advised me to get it checked up, that was when I fully concentrated on myself, and looked up through the internet and found DP.
I cancelled my lessons and told my teacher I'll call him back when I feel better. Around February my girlfriend demanded that I see a professional, I called up my local GP who gave me a leaflet to some mental group in my local area, and I started seeing this woman, lets call her Dr. X. Throughout February-June I saw Dr. X roughly a few weeks at a time, she gave me these 2 test papers every time I visited that assessed whether I had depression/anxiety. Each session she would give me booklets that contained info about these 2 things, but honestly I already knew much of the information already and they didn't really help me.
As each visit passed, I began to lose hope on the entire idea of getting back to normal, those 4 months were filled of a routine of going to college, going home, going work, going gym, going to girlfriend's house. I believe this is a reason for this time flying by, mainly because of doing the same thing all the time makes the brain feel like I've done it yesterday. Exams were around May-June, I was hoping to have recovered by then so I could actually concentrate on something, but unfortunately that didn't work, currently I'm a little nervous about the results in August.
On the last session I had with Dr. X in early June I explained that whilst I appreciated her help, I still feel the exact same way as the first time I walked into her room 4 months before, she just said that'll she'll fix me up with some other medical professional, in a way it sounded as if I was on her back and she's trying to get rid of me. Instead I just decided to not book another appointment with her, and just go back to my local GP.
What am I feeling?
DP/Depersonalization; I shouldn't really go into detail as many members here already understand how it feels, but in case anybody curious as to what they're feeling they may come across this post. I constantly feel like I'm in a dream, as if everything around me and beyond isn't real. This includes my own body, it feels foreign/alien to me. When looking in the mirror I see just a person, not myself. I look right back at myself but sometimes I don't even recognize the figure. Feelings seem to be numbed down. Pain, fear and joy. I still sense these feelings but it doesn't feel... correct. Memory has worsened, even big things such as people's names and important dates disappear when asked. Time flies incredibly quickly, I still can't believe its the middle of July right now... The thought that you're turning insane, although many explain that if you believe you're turning insane, then its likely that you're not, as people classified as insane tend to not know/believe that they're insane. Avoidance is another thing, likely stems from anxiety/depression but avoiding people/events is common.
Tinnitus; A condition that involves a constant noise in the ears, usually a buzzing noise. I've had tinnitus roughly the same time I picked up DP, its common that tinnitus derives from high stress levels which could be anxiety/depression, I'm no doctor but these are educated guesses.
Twitching; If I were to attempt to wink my left eye, my left eye will continue to wink another 2-3 times before I can manually stop it. Same with my other eye.
What am I doing about 'feelings'?
I've been on Citalopram for the past 5 weeks now (roughly early June til present), Citalopram so far has helped with my tinnitus, it has become much more unnoticeable when quiet so I can sleep easier. Now and then I would meditate or have heavy breathing sessions which gave a weird sensation but doesn't really last very long for me, it does somehow relieve DP for me temporarily. I've tried to spending more time with my loved ones, but this goes back to the numbed feelings from before, its great to be with them but it just doesn't feel correct, as if something is wrong.
Conclusion
I'd like to know a bit about your story too, if you could post that'll be great. I want to help if I can. I'd appreciate if you could give me some feedback too, if you have any questions please ask me! I'm really looking forward to speaking to other DP sufferers... It's mainly because I believe that nobody truly understands us unless they've experienced it themselves, in a way I can value an opinion from a DP sufferer more than a doctor, because they understand what I'm going through. But anyway, going sleep now, looking forward to your replies! Thanks for reading!
Basic summary of me
I'm 17 years old and of Chinese descent, I study A Level Maths, Business, Economics and Politics. I have a part time job on the Fri/Sat at a local takeaway. I have 2 older brothers and my mom and dad. I have a beautiful girlfriend that takes care of me. I believe I've had DP for around 7-8 months, from what it was stemmed from I have many possibilities but I'll talk about that later in this post.
Last 7-8 months
To be honest the last 7-8 months have flown by (in a bad way), likely because my track of time has worsened terribly with DP. I believe I started having this feeling roughly around November-December, honestly this really did come out of nowhere I because of my worsened memory I can't recall where/what I was doing at the time when it happened. I told my girlfriend how I was feeling and she said I should get it checked up but at the time I really didn't believe it was a big deal. Throughout January I thought it would of been just a phase of growing up, or that I was just feeling a little unwell. But at the time I was learning how to drive, it was roughly my 15th lesson so I was pretty fluent at the skill, but my teacher explained that my last few sessions weren't that great, I was making mistakes and dwelling about them throughout the lesson which distracted my concentration, creating more mistakes to dwell on and thus a cycle is created. He explained that he believed something was wrong, he could see I was well and he advised me to get it checked up, that was when I fully concentrated on myself, and looked up through the internet and found DP.
I cancelled my lessons and told my teacher I'll call him back when I feel better. Around February my girlfriend demanded that I see a professional, I called up my local GP who gave me a leaflet to some mental group in my local area, and I started seeing this woman, lets call her Dr. X. Throughout February-June I saw Dr. X roughly a few weeks at a time, she gave me these 2 test papers every time I visited that assessed whether I had depression/anxiety. Each session she would give me booklets that contained info about these 2 things, but honestly I already knew much of the information already and they didn't really help me.
As each visit passed, I began to lose hope on the entire idea of getting back to normal, those 4 months were filled of a routine of going to college, going home, going work, going gym, going to girlfriend's house. I believe this is a reason for this time flying by, mainly because of doing the same thing all the time makes the brain feel like I've done it yesterday. Exams were around May-June, I was hoping to have recovered by then so I could actually concentrate on something, but unfortunately that didn't work, currently I'm a little nervous about the results in August.
On the last session I had with Dr. X in early June I explained that whilst I appreciated her help, I still feel the exact same way as the first time I walked into her room 4 months before, she just said that'll she'll fix me up with some other medical professional, in a way it sounded as if I was on her back and she's trying to get rid of me. Instead I just decided to not book another appointment with her, and just go back to my local GP.
What am I feeling?
DP/Depersonalization; I shouldn't really go into detail as many members here already understand how it feels, but in case anybody curious as to what they're feeling they may come across this post. I constantly feel like I'm in a dream, as if everything around me and beyond isn't real. This includes my own body, it feels foreign/alien to me. When looking in the mirror I see just a person, not myself. I look right back at myself but sometimes I don't even recognize the figure. Feelings seem to be numbed down. Pain, fear and joy. I still sense these feelings but it doesn't feel... correct. Memory has worsened, even big things such as people's names and important dates disappear when asked. Time flies incredibly quickly, I still can't believe its the middle of July right now... The thought that you're turning insane, although many explain that if you believe you're turning insane, then its likely that you're not, as people classified as insane tend to not know/believe that they're insane. Avoidance is another thing, likely stems from anxiety/depression but avoiding people/events is common.
Tinnitus; A condition that involves a constant noise in the ears, usually a buzzing noise. I've had tinnitus roughly the same time I picked up DP, its common that tinnitus derives from high stress levels which could be anxiety/depression, I'm no doctor but these are educated guesses.
Twitching; If I were to attempt to wink my left eye, my left eye will continue to wink another 2-3 times before I can manually stop it. Same with my other eye.
What am I doing about 'feelings'?
I've been on Citalopram for the past 5 weeks now (roughly early June til present), Citalopram so far has helped with my tinnitus, it has become much more unnoticeable when quiet so I can sleep easier. Now and then I would meditate or have heavy breathing sessions which gave a weird sensation but doesn't really last very long for me, it does somehow relieve DP for me temporarily. I've tried to spending more time with my loved ones, but this goes back to the numbed feelings from before, its great to be with them but it just doesn't feel correct, as if something is wrong.
Conclusion
I'd like to know a bit about your story too, if you could post that'll be great. I want to help if I can. I'd appreciate if you could give me some feedback too, if you have any questions please ask me! I'm really looking forward to speaking to other DP sufferers... It's mainly because I believe that nobody truly understands us unless they've experienced it themselves, in a way I can value an opinion from a DP sufferer more than a doctor, because they understand what I'm going through. But anyway, going sleep now, looking forward to your replies! Thanks for reading!
