[andrew isaac]

Hi, my name is andrew. I won't specify age because I could get in some form of trouble, you will get what I mean if you keep reading. I think I might be struggling with depersonalization and derealization on a regular basis. I think it most likely was triggered this summer, about 4 months ago. After I had smoked 6 joints and had taken a really small dose of shrooms. when I went to drink water I started choking, like really choking, eventually after aspirating for like a minute i coughed up water, and was ok. But this triggered a massive panic attack, I couldn't breathe and my heart was going a million miles a minute. I ended up staying up till 7:00 am in the morning only to wake up at 9:00am. the next day I felt fine and went about my day with my friends, as I was at there cottage. that moment was life changing for me. I had one more traumatic high after that, I was at school and had taken 7 hits of a 97% thc dab pen, my hearing became heightened and i felt like people were looking at me. which triggered another panic attack. the first time I ever really felt DR was a couple of weeks later at school. we were just working out and it happened, i felt this almost like wave come over me, i couldn't focus on anything and nothing seemed real. I started freaking out a little, everything felt off. I actually started punching things to make sure they were real. eventually I went home to calm down, i turned the tv on but i just couldn't look at it. Ever since then I have felt this disconnection from my surroundings. the scariest thing is my emotional disconnection to people I know, sometimes i look at my dad or my mom and nothing, sometimes i can't recognize them, but not like actually, like cognitively i know who they are but there's a disconnect. my memory is also the worst, I'm emotionally disconnected from all my old memories, i look at old photos of myself from less than a year ago and it seems like another person. i go about my days and it feels like how some people describe it, like i'm just a "set of eyes", I feel like i'm watching life not experiencing. everyday i have this awful brain fog and my vision feels blurry. this has been going on for like 3.5 months now and I don't know what to do. can someone tell me if this sounds like dpdr, because nobody in my life will take me seriously. also sometimes i feel like i'm not controlling my words, like i'm not consciously speaking, like when i'm talking to someone i'm just "speaking" if that makes sense

 

[Tim45]

It sounds like DP/DR to me. First you have to understand that this condition is not going to harm you. Neither you will lose control or get schizophrenic. First of all you have to avoid weed/psychedelics, because they trigger DP/DR immensely and will bring up the "trauma" you got from it, but I assume you have already cut them out. You might think you damaged your brain with these drugs, but that is not the case. Try to focus on things you like to do and get out of the introspective. Keep in mind that the symptoms you experience are "normal" and do not see them as a threat, because they are a result of anxiety. If you evaluate them as a threat, you will start a loop.

 

[andrew isaac]

yeah i have cut out all forms of drugs, i haven't touched any for the last like a month and a half. the loop you talked about is very relatable. I constantly get stuck in this state of panic or thinking i'm going crazy which just leads to it getting worse. it can be very scary and overwhelming, but it helps to know there are other people who are dealing with this too. do you have any suggestions that may help with the DR because that scares me the most?

 

[Tim45]

The number one rule to overcome this is to not panic. It sounds easy, but of course it is not. You have to make clear that anxiety can not harm you in any way. It is a natural defense mechanism from our brain like derealisation. Derealisation occurs when a traumatic event happens, for example your life is threatened, so its there to protect us from trauma and that we do not get paralyzed by fear. We DP/DR sufferers see the condition, which occurs to protect us, as a threat and not the traumatic event itself. That is where it all starts. We fear this condition, but it is only there because of the anxiety. You probably think stuff like "This does not seem real" etc. and these thoughts keep the derealisation alive, because these thoughts cause a stress reaction the brain. Of course you can not change the thoughts you were thinking all these months overnight. They will occur automatically, but you can just let them flow and do not give them value. Thoughts like this only occur over and over again, because we gave them too much negative value and our brain drives the attention more on the negative stuff. What you have to do is to distract your mind, do things you like to do. The fear of going "crazy" is also a symptom. There is no correlation between DP/DR and schizophrenia. My mother had a psychosis once, so the chances are high for me to get one too, especially after the heavy drugs I took, but until now I did not got one and you will not get it too. I hope it can help you a little bit.

 

[NoDevils]

Six joints that's absurd. It sounds exactly like depersonalization. What you should do is simply try to be well and if you can't function or are actually about to snap then get some help. When you feel very depersonalized try to say to yourself well this may be unfortunate but I'm not going to hyperfocus on it. Don't use marijuana at all anymore. Marijuana's effect on some people's brains is as a depersonalizing drug and once you get the depersonalization it becomes increasingly likely to happen again. Follow these instructions as well as whatever else you think is important for your wellbeing and your symptoms will probably reduce.

 

[dpdrhaver184]

Sounds like DP/DR. It's very common to use weed, have a panic attack, and get this. Others have recovered from this type of DP/DR so you are not alone. Remember to quit all drugs, including alcohol.

 

[andrew isaac]

Sounds like DP/DR. It's very common to use weed, have a panic attack, and get this. Others have recovered from this type of DP/DR so you are not alone. Remember to quit all drugs, including alcohol.

alcohol has never really been my thing, and I haven't done any drugs in a while. if you have any experience with nicotine, would you suggest I try quitting that too?

 

[S0ullessg0dessx3]

Honestly you described everything I’m going through to a T. I have been feeling the same exact feelings as you for about 3 years at first I tried to not pay attention to it and I thought I was going crazy. Just recently I have been doing more research and I found this forum to see how do people cope with this feeling. It’s hard to act “normal” when this feeling hits you. It’s so hard for me and it hits me often when I’m driving and my surroundings look so weird and I panic because I also have bad anxiety I start overthinking my emotions and I get myself deep into panic. People keep telling me to accept it and it’ll get better but it’s hard to accept this I feel so weird and I feel like im just looking at someone’s life thru these little windows aka my eyes. My memory also has been very bad and it scares me it just nothing feels right. I hope you get better and I hope this goes away for everyone dealing with it.

 

[NoDevils]

alcohol has never really been my thing, and I haven't done any drugs in a while. if you have any experience with nicotine, would you suggest I try quitting that too?

We can know the general risks of a drug, and we can discover how we personally respond to a drug via experience. You're the person most qualified to say if nicotine is bothering you. It has significant potential to exacerbate anxiety and it's one of the most addictive drugs.

 

[andrew isaac]

People keep telling me to accept it and it’ll get better but it’s hard to accept this I feel so weird and I feel like im just looking at someone’s life thru these little windows aka my eyes. My memory also has been very bad and it scares me it just nothing feels right. I hope you get better and I hope this goes away for everyone dealing with it.

thank you, yeah It can be really hard when you try to explain how your feeling to the people around you, and they either dismiss it as a feeling that will pass, or just they just don't get it or blatantly say how you are feeling is wrong, all of which i have experienced, its good to know there are others who understand and can help and relate to me .

 

[dpdrhaver184]

alcohol has never really been my thing, and I haven't done any drugs in a while. if you have any experience with nicotine, would you suggest I try quitting that too?

I recommend quitting it. It's not good for you, tolerance builds so it feels less good over time, and it has not done any favors for my DP/DR. Others I know have gotten spikes from it.

 

[S0ullessg0dessx3]

thank you, yeah It can be really hard when you try to explain how your feeling to the people around you, and they either dismiss it as a feeling that will pass, or just they just don't get it or blatantly say how you are feeling is wrong, all of which i have experienced, its good to know there are others who understand and can help and relate to me .

yea I tried to describe the feeling to my counselor and she told me it’s because I quit drugs and now the world looks new because I was always under the influence of something… but even before doing drugs I felt that way. None of my family even know we don’t even talk about feelings so I try to act like everything is okay. Some days I don’t think about it as much I’ll be doing something fun and then boom I get hit. Today I was at the store looking at jeans and I started experiencing dr in my head I just wanna run away but instead I stay in the same place and I try to calm myself in my head I just keep saying it’s okay it’s okay it’s okay till ita actually okay… we’ll kind of and than I started getting these weirdos thoughts when I’m driving everything looks so new and I think how do I even know where I’m driving right now like how am I doingthis… idk I just feel scared and lost and stuck. I also I’m glad I found this forum I thought I was going crazy or somethin lol

 

[Dragoon909]

Hi, my name is andrew. I won't specify age because I could get in some form of trouble, you will get what I mean if you keep reading. I think I might be struggling with depersonalization and derealization on a regular basis. I think it most likely was triggered this summer, about 4 months ago. After I had smoked 6 joints and had taken a really small dose of shrooms. when I went to drink water I started choking, like really choking, eventually after aspirating for like a minute i coughed up water, and was ok. But this triggered a massive panic attack, I couldn't breathe and my heart was going a million miles a minute. I ended up staying up till 7:00 am in the morning only to wake up at 9:00am. the next day I felt fine and went about my day with my friends, as I was at there cottage. that moment was life changing for me. I had one more traumatic high after that, I was at school and had taken 7 hits of a 97% thc dab pen, my hearing became heightened and i felt like people were looking at me. which triggered another panic attack. the first time I ever really felt DR was a couple of weeks later at school. we were just working out and it happened, i felt this almost like wave come over me, i couldn't focus on anything and nothing seemed real. I started freaking out a little, everything felt off. I actually started punching things to make sure they were real. eventually I went home to calm down, i turned the tv on but i just couldn't look at it. Ever since then I have felt this disconnection from my surroundings. the scariest thing is my emotional disconnection to people I know, sometimes i look at my dad or my mom and nothing, sometimes i can't recognize them, but not like actually, like cognitively i know who they are but there's a disconnect. my memory is also the worst, I'm emotionally disconnected from all my old memories, i look at old photos of myself from less than a year ago and it seems like another person. i go about my days and it feels like how some people describe it, like i'm just a "set of eyes", I feel like i'm watching life not experiencing. everyday i have this awful brain fog and my vision feels blurry. this has been going on for like 3.5 months now and I don't know what to do. can someone tell me if this sounds like dpdr, because nobody in my life will take me seriously. also sometimes i feel like i'm not controlling my words, like i'm not consciously speaking, like when i'm talking to someone i'm just "speaking" if that makes sense

Strange...
Because I don't smoke, but the symptoms you are explaining is like the ones I have:
Heightened hearing
Fog
Disconnected from surroundings

I also have tinnitus with mine.

I would definitely say derealization and depersonalization.

 

[Trith]

yea I tried to describe the feeling to my counselor and she told me it’s because I quit drugs and now the world looks new because I was always under the influence of something… but even before doing drugs I felt that way. None of my family even know we don’t even talk about feelings so I try to act like everything is okay. Some days I don’t think about it as much I’ll be doing something fun and then boom I get hit. Today I was at the store looking at jeans and I started experiencing dr in my head I just wanna run away but instead I stay in the same place and I try to calm myself in my head I just keep saying it’s okay it’s okay it’s okay till ita actually okay… we’ll kind of and than I started getting these weirdos thoughts when I’m driving everything looks so new and I think how do I even know where I’m driving right now like how am I doingthis… idk I just feel scared and lost and stuck. I also I’m glad I found this forum I thought I was going crazy or somethin lol

I had the same with some therapists, it sounds like a classic. Some told me my DPDR must be due to anxiety even though I tell them that my anxiety has reduced by 90% in the past years and my DPDR stayed the same, or they tell me my memory problems are due to some other disease instead of med side effects when they started only with meds and I didn't have such problems before and the side effect I mentioned is listed on most versions of the med. One of them told me to try meditation just 5 minutes every day, and I told him I had already done this for years, different durations for up to one hour every day and it was cool but did not really reduce my DPDR, but he dismissed my answer and insisted I should do this... I watched a comedian recently who talked about his experience with psychiatry and said that he had serious problems when he was young, like it made him seriously suicidal with obsessions, and they said it was probably because he was a teenager and it would stop with time. He said he had had that since years before we was a teenager and they insisted on their theory without listening to him. He went back much later when he was not a teenager anymore and they told him that his problem would get better if he tried to drink more water. The description of his problems was quite horrible, and it culminated in a suicide attempt. He eventually found help with better psychiatrists in another country in a super expensive institution and got a proper diagnosis and better help and got better.
I believe some psychiatrists and therapists are complete idiots. It's good to question ourselves but they need to have at least a grain of self doubt too, they are not wizzards. My practice now is to tell them more what I think. I think it's a good practice of self affirmation and it might be helping for my DPDR. Personally I am fed up with being submissive to these people. They won't know they are idiots if nobody tells them (politely of course). It's ok not to know everything but it's not ok to make people lose time, money and mental health just to play their stupid games.

 

[Dragoon909]

And I agree with finding this forum...
It is a blessing to me, because if I didn't know what this is, I would think I was losing it.

I can't imagine ppl who went through this back in, let's say the early 1900's.

Derealization and depersonalization are actually harmless...even though they are annoying and scary.