[128682]

my dp feeling has vanished, but I’m still left with the after math, I feel like I’m traumatized by it, like I’m terrified I’ll get it again, because I had it two other times, a year apart. I still get existential thoughts and my mind still can’t seem to understand it. my theory is that, my whole life, I’ve been oblivious to “life” and just kept going, not really questioning anything. but now, I can’t stop thinking about life... like it’s so weird... how I’m still alive... if that makes any sense... I just feel like in order for me to cope, I’m distracting my mind and that doesn’t sit right with me, it feels like I’m ignoring, something I shouldn’t... people say to not ignore it, but that’s even worse because nobody has the answers to these questions! I try not to be hard on myself and remind myself that nobody has a manual to “life”, nobody’s experienced at this. everyone’s fighting their own demons, but I really wish questioning life wasn’t my thing...

 

[Array]

Trust me, these insane theories about the universe and the idea of existence in general haunt me every second. There are 0 answers to these questions, literally, I've tried, no matter what - the rules of the universe are arbitrary and you cannot prove that you're not in a simulation but the funny thing is these questions apply to the universe above us (If there is one) about the reasoning for their existence, the cure sorry to say, is just to stop thinking about it or get into the habit of preventing yourself from going down the rabbit hole every time it starts.

 

[Chip1021]

I get this. I get this so much.

 

[Cali123]

You wanna trade lives? Lol cause I rather be normal and question things than being in this state.. it’s definitely going to stop though. I don’t have questions about the universe because I simple don’t care, I just wanna feel more like myself... Try meditation, tea or supplements to calm your mind down.

 

[Jix]

Im almost recovered and i can share some advice on these things. Whether itll help or not i cant say but i will try.
Existential thoughts were the worst part of my dpdr and would stay 24/7 everyday. It made everything seem absolutely pointless and absurd. This went on for a year, every single day. Only recently did they stop bothering me.

Remember that these thoughts are just thoughts. Nothings actually changed. Reality hasnt actually changed. It just seems like it. It feels like youve finally woken up to how things actually are. Think about all the random shit your mind comes up with every day. Most of it is tossed away because it doesnt seem important to you. These thoughts are literally the exact same.
If you for instance saw a bag drifting in the wind, you wouldnt immediately think "omg gravity must not be working, we're in danger" because thats silly. The same is with these existential and other thoughts. Everything is just the way it is, plain and simple. This is all there is. I had a recurrent existential thought that drove me absolutely mad thinking "why does the universe exist? We must be in like a video game thats been turned on" then id think well then what created that universe? And id dwell on concepts like infinity. This was the worst anxiety ive ever experianced in my life. But after a while, after the shock of these thoughts pass, you need to realize that nothing has really changed, you can think normally again as soon as you decide that these thoughts really dont mean anything at all. Its interesting to think about under normal circumstances but just because there is no real answers yet doesnt mean you should be afraid of them. We fear the unknown and thats ok. But remember that its totally possible to revert back to your normal way of thinking.

Try some meditation. It allows you to practice observing thoughts passively and without judgement. You can also look up on youtube people who have gotten over these thoughts and have some solid advice. A couple videos in particular really helped me over this hurdle too.

 

[128682]

thank you so much for the replies guys! and Jix thank you so much for the advice it really helped. I always remind myself that me questioning all of this doesn’t change anything... the world doesn’t stop when I’m in that state of mind. I’ll definitely try meditation and look up videos!

 

[Psyborg]

can you explain the "existential thoughts" you have ? what exactly are those thoughts consisting of ?

 

[128682]

my existential thoughts consist of being alive... in a body, thinking and processing things. It’s all so weird to me how we only know how to “live”, this is all we know. I’m not into philosophy, nor do I consider myself smart, I hate conspiracy theories. so I definitely think these thoughts are ocd thoughts, because they’re so obsessive and intrusive. I use to talk about this with my sister, how it’s weird that we all have a perspective and it use to not bother me, like I didn’t care. now, it’s like my mind is so overly aware/awake that it’s all I think about in the background of my mind and where, you’re definitely right about social media thing... this generation is all about that, that we don’t even know how to actually “live” without distracting ourselves with something online.

 

[willbarwa]

my dp feeling has vanished, but I'm still left with the after math, I feel like I'm traumatized by it, like I'm terrified I'll get it again, because I had it two other times, a year apart. I still get existential thoughts and my mind still can't seem to understand it. my theory is that, my whole life, I've been oblivious to "life" and just kept going, not really questioning anything. but now, I can't stop thinking about life... like it's so weird... how I'm still alive... if that makes any sense... I just feel like in order for me to cope, I'm distracting my mind and that doesn't sit right with me, it feels like I'm ignoring, something I shouldn't... people say to not ignore it, but that's even worse because nobody has the answers to these questions! I try not to be hard on myself and remind myself that nobody has a manual to "life", nobody's experienced at this. everyone's fighting their own demons, but I really wish questioning life wasn't my thing...

This MAY be counterproductive, but try philosophy. You have these existential questions which everyone at some point ponders. I'm on that same road to recovery and have found a comfortable disposition in metaphysics. I may not ever find those answers and philosophy does not provide an ultimate resolution to existence but it does well to analyze what identity and reality seems to be.

For many dp individuals, this may not be the appropriate time to venture into that subject as many find it to trigger their symptoms. As for me, it's comforting.

 

[willbarwa]

Trust me, these insane theories about the universe and the idea of existence in general haunt me every second. There are 0 answers to these questions, literally, I've tried, no matter what - the rules of the universe are arbitrary and you cannot prove that you're not in a simulation but the funny thing is these questions apply to the universe above us (If there is one) about the reasoning for their existence, the cure sorry to say, is just to stop thinking about it or get into the habit of preventing yourself from going down the rabbit hole every time it starts.

Yes, it's baffling. But my advice is that although certain things cannot be proven wrong, it does not mean there is a necessity to prove them otherwise. Questioning whether the table in front of you exist at all, is circumventing and cumbersome. Obviously it is there, your interactions with it and anything else around you, for the sake of appearances, is quite real. Idealism describes everything is mental but there are substantial amount of reasoning that implicates this is not so. Nothing can be proven with a guarantee, but logic is what lays down fundamentals that constitutes our natural predisposition in supposing the world feels real and for that matter it is satisfactory enough

 

[Jix]

thank you so much for the replies guys! and Jix thank you so much for the advice it really helped. I always remind myself that me questioning all of this doesn't change anything... the world doesn't stop when I'm in that state of mind. I'll definitely try meditation and look up videos!

Im super glad i could help. I hope you and everyone else with this starts seeing more improvement soon!