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Living Nightmare u.u
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
After years of being DP/DR free, I recently had what most likely was the biggest panic attack in my life which put me once again in a full & constant DP/DR state. I never thought this would actually come back, but as I look around things seem way too fake, the whole concept of me being able to move my body scares me, literally everything in my life feels off right now. Not sure if any of the old members still hang around but yeah, recovery is more than possible, I just have no idea how to deal with it this time T_T
 

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i did relapsed also. after 6 dp free years. but not with a panic attack. for me it was a major depressive episode and anxiety. i had thought i was gone already crazy. and this time my symptoms are differently. much more intense. this time i dont have much hope to overcome. i have a feeling in myself. this time i wont.
 

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Living Nightmare u.u
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1,842 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I mean it's even harder to get better with this whole social distancing that we have to go through right now... not the best time to relapse :(
 

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10-11 years bro. You may remember me. I used to have a pink elephant as my icon which apparently disappeared at some point some how. Did DP/DR go away? Not entierly but yes, but no. Its complicated. Its nice to say yes. Would I depersonalize at times. Yes. And I would get out of it fast. Did I have down times and bad times. Yes. But there is a huge difference between what was in 2010 and now in 2021.

I was starting to get awkward over break. Things got worse. I had some signs but I didn't think it was that bad. I was losing interest in things. With everything going on with work and politics and life and shit people were saying I was probably getting anxious. Then I had a trigger event (some personal shit) and I felt it come on. I tried to get out of it but I woke up in the middle of the night with a panic attack.

Covid makes things hard. I'm seeing a therapist and its telehealth. Also the 2 people i've dealt with don't want to prescribe the clonezepam like 10 years ago. If I even wanted my old psychiatrist he should be retired for sure by now. I eventually was on .5mg morning 1mg night back then. And also 150mg Zoloft. I'm currently 100mg zoloft and trying this whole Gabapentin thing which I'm confused about as of right now. If I get proper sleep I feel really drugged in the morning like a LOT.

Some things are easier than back in 2010. Some things are better. Some seem worse. I don't exactly obsess over the vision stuff so much thats for sure. But I HATE when I have the jumpy hypervigilance stuff.

Youtube is a totally different place now. Its filled with information including HPA Axis Dysfunction stuff which I didn't know about. And people straight talking about panic that makes my panic look like nothing.

Anyways. Hope things are going better for you guys.
 
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