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Blankxi, Don't give up hope. I think from the way you are talking you should perhaps talk to someone. Are you in the uk? I think you should visit the website and consider speaking to them. Talk to your Doctor and maybe they can give you something fast acting that can bring you some relief like Xanax? I know how difficult this condition can be everyday, but lets talk about what could maybe help you make steps forward? I cannot say my condition has improved much, but you do learn to cope and to live with it. And I still have hope to defeat this one day

https://www.samaritans.org/
 

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Dude, theres is always hope. If you end it all then there the hope is gone. You know what the issue is, there are many options left to try. You can do this! I myself have the blank mind as well, my minds eye is gone. But I feel like I know why it's there. It's not broken. What did you try, just talk to me friend PM me.
 

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"To understand something, is to be liberated from it.". I thought I was at the very end of my rope on at least 2 occasions.

I survived somehow. For me, It was worth it. Your mileage may vary. I did learn the genesis of my illness, and that knowledge

allowed me to persevere.

I wouldn't have judged myself harshly if I had conceded. It's a difficult and

very personal decision..Sadly, "There is no honor in suffering", but it is difficult to know when there may be

a break in the clouds.
 
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