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i think this is reason for my dp and depression that i just keep creating very unconsciously things i dont want. and everything goes totally wrong direction. i really wanna end this battle in my head. i feel so helpless. i cant think anymore. all i feel is discomfort, anxiety wanting to escape. all i create is even more badness to muself so im fearing doing anything. how to i do this.. now im truly first time in my life totally in the core of this hell. this is the thing which always was here but now im more deeply in it and cant get away. first time totally confused and helpless. its kind of empty.. but its still strange. so its not completely just nothing. its constant struggle.
 

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It can be a subtle thing to start. There can be a lot of negative automatic thoughts running in the background. They can be so normal to us we aren't aware of them. They didn't come from us, it was from other people. It can help to understand that just because you were made to feel bad doesn't mean you are bad, and keep reaffirming this to yourself. Accept any strong bad feelings, but always support yourself with your self-talk. You can overwrite bad programming, it just takes practice.
 
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