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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi everyone,
I had DP now for over a year, which is probably in comparison to what other people have experienced a short time period. But I am getting better every day and I really notice how mentally and also physically the fog resolves.

A little bit about me and why I am posting this:
I worked a couple of years in high tech in Silicon Valley before I got my DP. I had the very same symptoms everyone else is describing here. I felt like I was going to die, at the same time ironically I thought I was already dead, like my soul was gone or like there was an entity seperate from me or felt like a robot. I had panice attacks and much more symptoms. Essentially any of the major symptoms described on this forum.
I was by no means a strong believer of any religion, but at times I felt like I was controlled or maybe that this was a challenge that was put opon me.
I don't want to argue in here whether this is true or not, but I want to lay out some of the things I researched that have helped me to a great extend in overcoming this.

First of all if you just started experiencing any of these symptoms, I wanted to let you know that it will go away. When I first read an article online stating it will go away when I was deep down into the DP, I thought to myself "No its different with me. Something in my brain is wrong. Etc etc." Before I go into some of the things I researched, one of the main things that will help you along the way is acceptance. It might sound odd to you because depending on your stage it could be quite the opposite of what you want to do.
One thought that helped me was to accept that I am not special. Just like you reading this. And since everyone who is posting about their symptoms here is experiencing essentially the same objectively speaking (robot feeling, detachment, etc) although it might feel stronger for you than to somebody else, the symptoms are the same. Alone from that you can conclude that there is nothing majorly wrong or unfixable with you.

Where I am at right now I can have the thought "Hey I am a robot" without getting a panic or anxiety attack. To me this was one of the most annoying things about DP: That thinking about some of these thoughts lead me to fear and I couldn't control stop thinking about it.

Now that I have introduced myself a little, I wanted to share some of the tricks that helped me get rid of it.
One of the first things you can actively do is to get a physical examination maybe even see a neurologist. For the majority of the people this will rule out any physical heritage of the DP. If it's physical you can get medical treatment, if not you need take a different approach.
If you find out there physically nothing wrong with you, you need to accept that you have a mental problem.
Again the topic of acceptance comes up. This is a crucial step though. Because next you need to self reflect what has happened in the last couple of month, maybe years that lead up to this development of DP. Maybe somebody died in your family, another tragic event has happened or maybe you have just been overstressed with work or you have been extremely depressed for a long time. Yes, DP can come from depression.
Why does it occur in the first place?
Unless you have been experimenting with drugs and even then I would argue that there is an underlying problem and not the drug only by itself that caused your DP, DP is a protective mechanism of your body and mind.
This is another key acceptance point that helped me along the way. DP is just there to protect you.

You might ask now OK what does it protect me then from if I feel literally the worst I have ever felt in my life?
Valid question. The answer depends a little bit on what you found out to be the root cause for your DP. It could protect you from the pain you experienced from losing someone beloved or from the unhealthy stress that you put your body through from maybe work. Accepting this will help you along the way too. But as soon as your body and mind have realized you don't need to be protected anymore it fades. Slowly but surely.

Personally, I would stay away from any depression medication. Clinical depression runs in my family. My mom has it, my sister has it, I have it. But that medication can easily make you addicted and whether you solve the root cause is not guaranteed just because you take some pills. Whether you believe in God or not, I doubt taking pills solves this problem for you. Because it can be that your way of living has caused this DP and if you keep on living the same way you have just taking some mood increasing pills, the underlying cause essentially gets ignored. And if you believe in God I doubt he wants you to take pills to deal with your problems.

What I would suggest to you, is to actually view this DP as something positive. It might be hard but what helped me was to think of it as a challenge not everyone is trusted with. I started to do more sports, I set more goals for myself, I went out with my friends more even though I felt like staying home, visited my family, changed jobs, started new hobbies and joined clubs.
The mind responds very positive to social activities and doing sports does not only help with battling your mental thoughts but also helps you gain more energy which let's the DP not feel as heavy. I started with jogging.

I have read and also experienced myself how my memory was effected and I can also give you a very good reason why that is happening. Traumatic experiences are tried to be cut off from your mind. In a way it's like a last resort of your mind when it cannot deal with the negative impact. There are studies on trauma patients that have shown that this cutting off actually happens physically by your neurons being detached from each other. The axons are cut off. On top of this since your mind is very busy with processing either the root cause subconsciously or you consciously thinking about it or being busy focusing on the symptoms, your concentration naturally lacks. That leads to absorbing less information about the now, which in turn makes your memory worse.
What helped me was to take my mind of thinking about these symptoms by doing a hobby. For me it was research and development of software while listening to old school R&B.

There are symptoms which might throw you off. I had in the beginning a really weird sense of time perception. While this was only in the beginning it really threw me off. But also this faded over time naturally. Reassuring your self that it is only temporary but at the same time also giving yourself the time to heal without putting additional stress on yourself by wanting this to go as fast as possible makes all of these symptoms much easier to deal with.
Battling the confusing thoughts it hard but one thing that helped me was to question my thoughts. In the sense of "would a healthy minded person think this right now?".

If you are interested in some of the workings of DP itself, there is ongoing research about how DP has greatly to do with your endocannabinoid system being part of your central nervous system. Which would make sense taking into account the effects marihuana has on your system and how people claim to have developed DP by smoking weed.
Which would also make sense why Naloxone in Russia has shown great reduction of DP, as it is used to inverse the effects of many drugs working on the central nervous system when people are being send to hospitals completely overdosed. Even the effect description of marihuana high in CBD fits this thesis as it is supposed to help with a lot of mental issues and do the inverse of the psychoactive THC component. Although I would not put my money on this one regarding the ongoing monetization of legal weed in the US.

To summarize, acceptance is key while staying calm. Understanding that you are not the only one and that there are effective means you can take in order to battle this, is important.
Ultimately, you just want to live normally again so make plans to live a normal healthy live and the DP will go by itself.
There is no need to rush things.

I hope this helps you a little.
 

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How are you identity and emotion wise? I have no self, emotions or relation to anything around me, including objects, people, even my parents and home. Environment and vision is clearer than before but I have no connection to it. Feels like there is an empty space around me.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I am actually pretty good. Of course I am still recovering as well so I am not 100% where I want to be yet, but I also accepted this. Psychologist say that a mental health problem can last up to duration of the first occurrence of symptoms and the root cause.
This might be a very sensitive question to ask, but have you found out yet what caused your DP? Did you maybe lose somebody beloved?
Being detached from your emotions and from others is very normal with DP. While you are mentally healing your mind protects you from taking damage by further loss. You will be back to normal though as soon as you have healed.
 

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I am actually pretty good. Of course I am still recovering as well so I am not 100% where I want to be yet, but I also accepted this. Psychologist say that a mental health problem can last up to duration of the first occurrence of symptoms and the root cause.
This might be a very sensitive question to ask, but have you found out yet what caused your DP? Did you maybe lose somebody beloved?
Being detached from your emotions and from others is very normal with DP. While you are mentally healing your mind protects you from taking damage by further loss. You will be back to normal though as soon as you have healed.
Well, started off that my emotions felt completely numbed in april, then it progressed into dp in june when I found out what it was.

Recently went to a therapist (should of wrnt years ago and I wouldn't of gotten this far)
Basically what I considered as my life being normal to me was is in fact very traumatic.
Its been a build up of being in depression since I took a course of roaccutane in 2015.
Have cried a few times in therapy however I felt no emotion, but it just bubbled up out of nowhere over certain things, so it must be locked away.

Dad used to beat mum, hated him for it for years, moved around a few places, mother had a mental break down. Left 6th form, lost contact with friends, never had had a girlfriend or relations due to being ashamed of the acne on my back. My life since I left 6th form has been, go to work go home play games sleep, got to work etc.Never had a chance to express how I felt as i was always trying to keep my mother sane, and stop fights between her and my dad. Now I can't feel anything, lost identity, my self. Anxiety has dissappeared?
Can't remember how things used to look before dp, just know I can't connect with anything but my vision is fine, feels like I never had emotions wereas before I could gather them from memories. Etc.

But yes, depression, anxiety, trauma.

Shouldn't of googled my symptoms last night aswell as now I have convinced myself I'm schizo even though I am aware the world hasn't changed, i am completely rational,just my mind/perception so I can't be I guess?
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
You are definitely not shizo.
A lot of people with DP think they go crazy or become shizophrenic, but that's only due to the detachment from yourself. You are essentially trying to find an explanation for what could be wrong with you. I had the same thoughts. For a long time I thought I had brain damage because I had insane headaches and migraines. They become so strong in the beginning that I couldn't feel my surroundings anymore and only pain.
With your back story I am very very certain that there is nothing physically wrong with you nor that you are shizophrenic. Life has just been really rough for you and for the majority of the time you were able to surpress it. I think of my psyche as some kind of container. As long as you can pure water in its fine but once it's spills it spills symptoms.
If you never wash the glass it just keeps being filled more and more.
You definitely don't need to be ashamed of anything. Nobody is perfect.
If I was in your shoes which definitely sounds like a rough pair from what you said, I would try to reflect as much as I can on the relationship of my parents and the past.
I don't know if you have animals and maybe you don't like them, but getting a cat or a dog could help wonders as well. From what you said it could mix up your life a little. You could go running with the dog after work or go to the park with him. This would also help you with establishing a connection to something again.
Maybe sign up for the gym so you are surrounded by people. The fitness will help heal your mind and you will become more confident.
Finding a girlfriend will also be easy then since you have more to talk about then and your confidence level will be higher.
Trust me on this one. I had acne not only on my back but also all over my face. It really sucked not gonna lie but with exercise and a better diet, they completely disappeared.
 

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You are definitely not shizo.
A lot of people with DP think they go crazy or become shizophrenic, but that's only due to the detachment from yourself. You are essentially trying to find an explanation for what could be wrong with you. I had the same thoughts. For a long time I thought I had brain damage because I had insane headaches and migraines. They become so strong in the beginning that I couldn't feel my surroundings anymore and only pain.
With your back story I am very very certain that there is nothing physically wrong with you nor that you are shizophrenic. Life has just been really rough for you and for the majority of the time you were able to surpress it. I think of my psyche as some kind of container. As long as you can pure water in its fine but once it's spills it spills symptoms.
If you never wash the glass it just keeps being filled more and more.
You definitely don't need to be ashamed of anything. Nobody is perfect.
If I was in your shoes which definitely sounds like a rough pair from what you said, I would try to reflect as much as I can on the relationship of my parents and the past.
I don't know if you have animals and maybe you don't like them, but getting a cat or a dog could help wonders as well. From what you said it could mix up your life a little. You could go running with the dog after work or go to the park with him. This would also help you with establishing a connection to something again.
Maybe sign up for the gym so you are surrounded by people. The fitness will help heal your mind and you will become more confident.
Finding a girlfriend will also be easy then since you have more to talk about then and your confidence level will be higher.
Trust me on this one. I had acne not only on my back but also all over my face. It really sucked not gonna lie but with exercise and a better diet, they completely disappeared.
I have a cat which I got over 1 year ago, this was whnetmy depression was deepest really, and I only really got Merlin to make my mother feel better

Tbh since I got her she was the only reason I looked forward to going home, but thqt connection and relation to my cat and my parents has dissappeared, everyone seems unfamiliar and unreal.

As for acne, unfortunately I have keloid scarring so that's an issue. Started going the gym recently actually haven't kept up though as I'm unsure what to really do there. May get a personal trainer for weight lifting.
Have no concept of confidence etc it the minute before this my social anxiety was through the roof, now I can go anywhere, but I have no need for anything.
I want to get back to normal but it seems impossible, and I lost hope back in October, I essentially gave up rather than letting go.

Did you lose your identity/self at any point (person driving)? Or by any chance forget what things used to be like then recover them.

All the best on your recovery back to normal!
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Yes I have been there.
In the beginning it felt indescribable horrible. I have never really cried in my life but since that happened I was in tears almost every day just because how odd and unreal everything was. But took it easy and thought to myself just take your time. If it comes it can go. I stopped focusing on the unreality feeling. I essentially accepted that I don't need to have everything feel real in order to live happy.
I set goals that helped me a lot to stop focusing on this weird feeling.
Jogging helped me a lot. It is actually supposed to be really helpful with mental health issues.
After a couple of month it got better and better. And it still gets better everyday.
By the way you can always reach out to me. Since this happened to me I feel actually really connected to the people suffering from the same, because they are the ONLY ones that truly know how shitty this feels
 

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You are definitely not shizo.
A lot of people with DP think they go crazy or become shizophrenic, but that's only due to the detachment from yourself. You are essentially trying to find an explanation for what could be wrong with you. I had the same thoughts. For a long time I thought I had brain damage because I had insane headaches and migraines. They become so strong in the beginning that I couldn't feel my surroundings anymore and only pain.
With your back story I am very very certain that there is nothing physically wrong with you nor that you are shizophrenic. Life has just been really rough for you and for the majority of the time you were able to surpress it. I think of my psyche as some kind of container. As long as you can pure water in its fine but once it's spills it spills symptoms.
If you never wash the glass it just keeps being filled more and more.
You definitely don't need to be ashamed of anything. Nobody is perfect.
If I was in your shoes which definitely sounds like a rough pair from what you said, I would try to reflect as much as I can on the relationship of my parents and the past.
I don't know if you have animals and maybe you don't like them, but getting a cat or a dog could help wonders as well. From what you said it could mix up your life a little. You could go running with the dog after work or go to the park with him. This would also help you with establishing a connection to something again.
Maybe sign up for the gym so you are surrounded by people. The fitness will help heal your mind and you will become more confident.
Finding a girlfriend will also be easy then since you have more to talk about then and your confidence level will be higher.
Trust me on this one. I had acne not only on my back but also all over my face. It really sucked not gonna lie but with exercise and a better diet, they completely disappeared.
Yes I have been there.
In the beginning it felt indescribable horrible. I have never really cried in my life but since that happened I was in tears almost every day just because how odd and unreal everything was. But took it easy and thought to myself just take your time. If it comes it can go. I stopped focusing on the unreality feeling. I essentially accepted that I don't need to have everything feel real in order to live happy.
I set goals that helped me a lot to stop focusing on this weird feeling.
Jogging helped me a lot. It is actually supposed to be really helpful with mental health issues.
After a couple of month it got better and better. And it still gets better everyday.
By the way you can always reach out to me. Since this happened to me I feel actually really connected to the people suffering from the same, because they are the ONLY ones that truly know how shitty this feels
Ah I see, just really want my old self back, or myself in general as I'm literally noone atm, don't even recognise how I was before and my thinking self has gone and my emotions. Want it all back, even the shitty social anxiety as its something I have to beat myself, not dissociate away.

When you get past this, which I believe you will I hope you'll come back and do a recovery! If not no worries. Thanks for the offer, I'll try not to unless I really need it but appreciate it, I do know what you mean about people having this, can't even connect with my parents. Someone who hasn't suffered from this could never understand what this feels like (hope they never will either)
 
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