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How to better accept DP?

1444 Views 4 Replies 4 Participants Last post by  Brady12
When I was 14 I struggled with DP/DR from smoking weed. I cant remember when it actually went away or how long it took, but eventually it did I just don't remember it being as bad as it is today. My DP/DR started in February of this year when I was pregnant. Nothing stressful had happened and nothing had really changed except my husband went away for a month and that is when it initially started. I was having trouble sleeping, and eating. I cant imagine why that would trigger DP/DR though? Today I am so far down in DP/DR I feel like I am going to lose my mind at any given moment, and forget my entire life. It is such a struggle living everyday trying to embrace and take in our new life with my son when I don't feel like he is even real and that truly just breaks my heart :cry: Everyone feels like a robot to me and my mind is so blank and dead I feel like I am forgetting every moment of everyday, yet if someone asks me something I can remember everything perfectly. I am desperate to find anything to make this go away fast so I can embrace this beautiful life I get to live with my son. I have heard that accepting this makes things so much better but it is so hard when I look around and feel like I am constantly in a daydream in a hole I cant get out of. I don't even know how I am a functioning human being. I see a psychologist and I cant get in to see a psychiatrist until January 9th. I have tried meditation and I am currently on Prozac, but my doctor recently switched me to Wellbutrin a few months ago and THAT made my DP/DR even WORSE. So now I am trying to get that out of my system and let the Prozac maybe bring me back a little. I am so lost, and I just wish this would go away or that I had more motivation to make it go away its so tiring trying to deal with all of this alone.
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I wish it was as easy for our brains to create this protection like mechanism as it was to get rid of it then maybe I would be willing to accept it a little more. It just takes a lot of energy especially when everyone around thinks you're fine and doesn't believe you. Last time if I remember correctly it lasted longer then a year, and I really don't want that to happen again. I just keep pondering on "I can't wait for normal to happen again.." which I think is causing mine to stick around more along with major anxiety when I start to realize how the DP/DR feels. Usually if I am lucky I can just ignore it.. but when I do realize it's a shit show.

Stay strong though Marinkawr! I am sure you have a beautiful family who loves and cares for you.
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