[freddie]

During some time in August, I was triggered to fall into a dissociative episode, and around the beginning of September I fell even deeper into it. I think it's probably the worst dissociation I've ever experienced. During regular conversations I will easily zone out within 30 seconds and I have to keep bringing myself back to the present moment and then it takes over again. As soon as I get even the tiniest bit upset I dissociate and my brain moves onto something different and I just forget why I was even upset in the first place. My concept of time is royally fucked, and so is my memory. At the end of the day I'll try to reflect on what I did that day or even that week and I cannot think of a single thing, besides that I had to go to class that day.

Recently I saw advice on how to help dissociation, and the advice was to not think about it, because the more I think about it the more frustration I'll have and the deeper I'll fall into it. I've been trying to do this but its so difficult not to just think about how to help dissociation. Every time I get frustrated all I can think about it is trying to stimulate my senses to lift the dissociation at least a little bit with maybe some ice cream or sour candy because they help but because of how bad my episode is right now nothing works.

I don't know how to stop thinking about it, I just want to think about what's going on right now in the present moment and focus on helping my anxiety disorder and depression and my relationship and school and hobbies. Thinking about dissociation only makes it worse.

How do I stop thinking about it?

 

[RunToMe]

that is the big question: "its like to please somebody to switch off your consciousness" its only possible to fall in coma from narcotic or when somebody dies. my obsessive thoughts dealing with emotional numbness, which i cannot live with it

its not a joke, when somebody can solve this philosophically or logic riddle, you get 200.000 euro

 

[Findmywayhome]

Damn. My dp/dr case sounds very similar to yours. Mine got triggered by a panic attack last month and since then it slowly got worse, but since last week its been in free fall. The worst thing is how my own thoughts and cognitions were invaded by the disorder. Which leads to exactly what you described: poor memory, no sense of time, constant zoning out, etc. Heres the thing: you cant force yourself to stop thinking about something, because that will inevitably lead you to start thinking about it. A better approach is to have a sense of indifference to your thoughts. Just let your thoughts exist and fade, just acknowledge them and nothing more. Dont try to investigate the thoughts, or inquire about them. This is something Im still learning to do in this current state. Time is your biggest friend here. It may take awhile, but eventually your brain will stop investing so much energy and time over the disorder. And this will provide relief and even alleviate the dp/dr to a certain degree.