Hi, I'm new here. I've been struggling with the way I percieve the world around me, where I am, and if I'm even real for over a year. I had a cocaine binge among some random pills for 3-4 months and woke up like this one day. I thought I was overdosing or had died and couldn't leave my boyfriends room for 4 days and was terrified. The way I view the world (literally) is different than it used to be. Everything is bright and close up. I had a problem with reality not seeming real when I was younger when my parents were addicts and had issues with feeling like I was dreaming as a kid. Both this time and the last time I had a fear of being drugged and taking medications, even Tylenol. I fear people put drugs in my food and drinks and I'm scared I'll never get better. I work a lot and it's the only distraction I have even though I'm never completely there.. I'm pregnant and want to be a good mother and not feel crazy. Please let me know if you are like this.