[Thomas2021]

Does anybody have like a hyperactive mind? Like a brain that can't just relax, but needs SOMETHING all day long to do. Like an obsession.

For me it was like my brain went into a higher level in 2012 when I used drugs, and never went back to normal. It's like the brain kicked into high gear, and has been in that state since, refusing to calm down.

some people describe a "black mind", that's not my problem at all. More like the opposite. Like my brain just HAS to be busy all day, and there's no alternative to relax.

I struggle to just watch a movie with out losing focus, like my mind can't focus for long before drifting of into daydreaming or thinking about other things.

 

[esroh]

Yea very much relate..the only times i can relax is after its been insanely bad for a while.

Like my brain overheats from all the insanity and obsession until its just forcef to let go. Then i get a few hours, maybe a day of reduced stress levels and some enjoyment.

Then it ramps up again. Ive realized that for me, all the physical and mental restlessness actually comes from my 24/7 hyperawareness obsession. Thertes just too much awareness on

FUCKING EVERYTHING.

For 5-7 days of torture i maybe get 1 day of being somewhat okay. Not a great ratio but these days are what keeps me going.

The frustrating thing is that i know that im doing this to myself but i just cant seem to stop it.

Its become so habitual..lorazepam can help because it kills the anxiety which underlies the obsession thus breaking the loop...but i dont want to take it too regularly..

 

[BlueTank]

A lot of people like us are pretty high functioning. I believe the DP/DR effect comes to different people and there is certainly a variety that has Panic Disorder / HPA Axis Dysfunction / High Anxiety. And it doesn't even have to be all the time. It can be triggered or fall in to it or during times of stress you find yourself with "racing thoughts". Intrusive thoughts too. "Earworms".

All in all what you are talking about is often summed up as Anxiety. This includes Intrusive Thoughts, Racing Thoughts, and an inability to focus. You think about the future, the past, and have conversations on your head. At the worst when anxiety is bad and adrenaline is going your mind can go nutts with it and hyper active. I mean we are talking about like a TEE TEE TEE TEE over and over in your head while you think of something else while you are imaginging some shit you dont want to imagine and can't stop. In looking in to this stuff you can just get buried in all sorts of overlap. PTSD. CPTSD. OCD. Panic. Anxiety. Bi Polar. ADHD.

I can have the movie/tv show thing bad at times. During Covid it was getting worse and I should have paid more attention to that. I would find myself rewinding things and me being scattered doing multiple things at once and jumping around. Multiple tabs open of the same site. Like more than usual.

Leading up to me crashing in to where I am at right now (which is bad) I was having a lot of this stuff. Depression and lack of concentration and focus.

Distracting yourself with good things you like to do is often a good way to go - the internet is a huge pile of contradicting information. So you can find tons about how distractions are terrible. You find that working out is somehting helping you and so you spend time doing that and some site/article is gonna talk about "people who workout to distract themselves. they can't sit still with themselves" type of shit. And eventually its like everybody is supposed to be a budhist monk sitting in place breathing and accepting. So I don't have the answers. I just know that has helped for me. And then you might find youself exhausted at night or you might find yourself thinking about stuff you want to do more than idle fucked up stuff.

If you figure something out let me know haha. If you are wondering if you are alone you are far from alone. I know tons of people with these issues and read about how everybody has a mind that won't stfu. Think of how many "vices" and addictions there are out there. A lot is said that this is why. Benzos slow you down. Alcohol is a suppressant (Be careful. For me it can just make it quite worse!). If you apply all the crap about why people do Paleo to may be how your mind works you have to think may be long ago you were just alawys doing shit. Running after an animal. Kill it. Cook it. Sex. Then pass out from exhaustion. Wake up early and start traveling to a place that has more food. Repeat until you break your leg and die at age 23.

 

[Aridity]

Yea very much relate..the only times i can relax is after its been insanely bad for a while.

Like my brain overheats from all the insanity and obsession until its just forcef to let go. Then i get a few hours, maybe a day of reduced stress levels and some enjoyment.

Then it ramps up again. Ive realized that for me, all the physical and mental restlessness actually comes from my 24/7 hyperawareness obsession. Thertes just too much awareness on

FUCKING EVERYTHING.

For 5-7 days of torture i maybe get 1 day of being somewhat okay. Not a great ratio but these days are what keeps me going.

The frustrating thing is that i know that im doing this to myself but i just cant seem to stop it.

Its become so habitual..lorazepam can help because it kills the anxiety which underlies the obsession thus breaking the loop...but i dont want to take it too regularly..

Yo bro haha. Ramo here.