[Chris_Liverpool]

Hi all!

I remember having symtoms of this horrible condition when i was about nine or ten years old. I was a bit of a nervous wreck as a kid and can remember refusing to go on school trips and generally just preferring to stay at home. I didn't dwell too much on the feelings I was having at the time as people kept on reassuring me that I was just suffering from panic attacks and they would go with age. As time went on however the feelings didn't recede and I can remember reciting my families names compulsively to myself as I was convinced I was literally losing my memory, nervy times indeed... The sensations did then seem to completely disappear for a while during high school and I was, for the most part, a regular functioning lad with normal worries and more than manageable levels of anxiety. This all changed just under three years ago when I lost my Dad to cancer at the age of 45, and the familiar feelings of unfamiliarity came flooding back and rendered me, once again, unable to function or enjoy life like I used to. I've been in and out of various mental health services but I seem to be resistant to all forms of therapy, I'm hoping that this community can provide a place where I can retreat to if things get too bad. Having said all this I can honestly say that I am still determined to find a cure. I have had this before and it went away so there must be a way out, any tips on coping with bad days and staying positive would be greatly appreciated, thank you for reading if you've made it this far!

"there must have been a door there in the wall when I came in..."- Pink Floyd, The wall - The trial

 

[106473]

Got out of it once, you can do it again.

Stop searching is my advice, treat your anxiety and depression with medication in time, but first try the forget about it approach... we are always here, so is medication, but the grief you are facing you need to deal with, you should come back, i think it's very natural. In saying that 3 years is a while, i see DP as a two fold thing, as i mentioned. Sorry I can't be better help.

Honestly, the tips on coping that i found apart from wearing sunglasses, is try and forget about it, it will stop the anxiety loop and with lower anxiety, who knows, DP might fade, it is considered by many as anxiety disorder and I had to do that for 2 years to get to where i am now, i couldn't of been on this forum when i got it at the start, now it feels like talking about my neighbours dog, i.e. it's nothing to me, you can't spike my anxiety or trigger me..obsessing will get you no where, being proactive about seeing the right doctors is not obsessing there is a big difference. Apart from that, all the usual depression or anxiety advice of the struggle applies really, coping with anything is the same, everyone has their issues, just another brick in the wall

 

[Chris_Liverpool]

Thankyou for your response CK1,

what you're saying makes perfect sense to me. I don't think i've felt better than when i've been doing something different with my time rather than just sitting in and dwelling on the problem. It's hard for me at the moment as i'm studying for final year exams which gives me an awful lot of time for rumnination! I think i'll make more time to play snooker or something that always helps.. I'm currently on a waiting list to see another doctor so I'll just see what I can do in the meantime.

Thankyou again for your kind response means a lot!

 

[Chris_Liverpool]

p.s. love the Floyd reference

 

[106473]

Good plan, stay busy, keep pushing forward, drop me a message if you get stuck or need advice, in the mean time keep "Ticking way the moments that make up a dull day".. i.e. get busy, constant distraction till it becomes natural. AWHHHH I just found Pink Floyd again..

 

[Chris_Liverpool]

hahaha perfect use of the song there! I will try it's hard to stay rational after a relapse but hey ho they happen. It's easy to ask what the point is If it's just gonna happen again and I don't think any of us are immune to those thoughts, its nice to hear other peoples stories too feel less lonely! As much as I love Floyd I cant help but think the music may be partly to blame for all this haha, theyre so close to home some of them... Here's one you can use, I often describe DP as being "uncomfortably numb"!

 

[Phantasm]

I know what you mean about them being close to home. I always remember the line, "hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way"!

 

[Chris_Liverpool]

Hi Phantasm!

Welcome to the floyd-a-thon! yeah that song in particular has a marked effect on me, i first listened to it when i was about 10 in my Dad's car, and i always remember the line "and then one day you find, ten years have got behind you, no one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun!" when I turned 20 I heard the lyrics again and realised 10 years had literally got behind me! I now skip the track altogether hahaha

 

[106473]

Comfortably numb is about DP

"When I was a child I had a fever

My hands felt just like two balloons
Now I've got that feeling once again
I can't explain, you would not understand
This is not how I am
I have become comfortably numb"

Anxiety makes rational thinking very difficult, if music is triggering it, for a while stay away... for a while I had to stay away from stuff like Pink Floyd that i'd sit and get stoned to, it raised my anxiety, made me feel worse about the situation and I didn't even get DP from Weed. Just how it goes, what you had will come back again..

 

[Chris_Liverpool]

wow i never really considered that, but it does make sense... i always thought it was about stage fright, but then again thats just a form of anxiety... which caused his DP!! I think you've nailed it haha. yeah I think I will hang up my headphones for a little while, cheers for the insight!

 

[106473]

Good man, i was doing sound and playing drums in the worst of DP I couldn't avoid the triggers, mainly stoner songs, on an SRNI (Mirtazapine) after 3 months it was no longer a trigger, now with time i don't get triggered.. healing process my friend