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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
how is everyone all good i hope .... i need a bit of a lift i think,ive been stuck in my flat now for years rarely going out ... panic attacks/dp/agorophobia ive got the full package .... anyway trying to keep this as brief as possible im just really going through the motions now,stuck in my tiny one bed flat .... very withdrawn drinking beer most of the day everyday ... i just feel trapped,no way out,dead inside .... no fight left inside ... its just all a total drag now and i have no fight left ....

as i say its been a while as ive just been dealing with things but im outta sorts atm just feeling out of it

all the best

jc
 

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Hi Jc! I'm so sorry that you're feeling this way, but also happy that you decided to put up a post here, this means that there's still some fight in you left.
I totally understand the situation you're in. I myself have been feeling quite hopeless for a while now, and although we might not actually be in the same situation, I get what you're feeling in a way.
I wish I'd known more about you, it'd make it easier for me to help you. Do you have a job? Any pets? Is there any reason that might have caused an increased feeling of hopelessness? You don't have to answer but I'd really like to help you.

The priority in your situation would be to go talk to someone, a therapist maybe? I don't know what your financial situation is, also don't know how much it costs where you live, but I'd say that is for sure a very important step. I know that might be difficult since COVID and everything, but consider even just video-chatting with someone who can help. If you find a good one, it can make a huge difference and they can usually help with issues like panic attacks, agorophobia, depression etc. If you don't have access to a therapist, there are great accounts on Instagram, and lots of sights here on the internet that have lots of good tips that I can recommend.

I don't have any special cure for getting out of it, but I hope you choose to go on. Life can be so so hard but if you manage to find something that brings you joy, even if it's the tiniest thing for a brief moment, you gotta keep going. And if you can't find that right now, keep looking. It's gonna be hard and it's gonna take a lot, but it's worth it for sure.

I think it's brave that you keep living even if you don't know how to anymore, and it's brave that you wake up everyday facing the same battles as you did the day before. This shows just how strong you are, so don't lose hope in yourself. Find something that keeps you going. You're not alone in this, and you've come too far to give up. There is help to get.

Idk if this helped at all, but I hope you keep going, I believe in you!

Wishing you all the best.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 · (Edited by Moderator)
thankyou kindly for the reply lost235

i just dont seem to be able to break out of this self isolation ive found myself in .... ive been speaking to a therapist since febuary 2020 and weve recenlty been doing a 'walk & talk' meeting in the park opposite me ... ive recently told her i need a break for a couple of weeks (just struggling to find the fight in me) i have no job 2 cats money wise im doing ok ..... im just fed up of being stuck in this damn flat and even if i wanted to do the things i used to do spontaneously,catch a bus into town for example i cant ! the thought of having a panic attack and the way everything looks 'spaced out' is stopping me from doing so ... im 49 coming upto the age of 50 and im just tired of it all and am left wondering 'is this it' ... im not living im just existing ... thankyou for the reply btw & taking the time to respond

all the best
 

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Hey jc,

I was pretty desperate some weeks ago, as at one point all of my efforts to get better seemed to give no results. I am not out of the woods yet, but I started with EMDR therapy four weeks ago, after realizing that I have completely isolated myself. Since I started with therapy, I re-connected to some of the activities that I was able to do before, without feeling tons of anxiety or agoraphobia while I am outside. I mean, obviously the 2020 is not a year that works for us in that regard, as it has been pretty isolating for lots of people, but it is completely different when you feel that isolation within yourself.

The core of my dissociation, including DPDR, is in childhood trauma. What I understood is that I need to integrate the implicit memories of traumatic event(s), that have never been properly filed as memories, in order to heal. It is by no means easy, I am having a hard time just facing some things, but I am aware there is no other way but through it. I am 44, btw, soon will be 45, and I have been trying so hard to heal these last four years. I made a lot of progress with CBT, and also on my own, in understanding where some things come from, but I came to a point where I actually need help and guidance, as my mind's makeup is such that it will do everything to maintain those same coping mechanisms that served it well for decades. But they just keep me stuck, and I did not want to accept that "it is it". No way that I am going to accept that's all there is. Don't accept it, man, you can find that strength in you! As long as we are alive, we can do something good for ourselves.

I believe you can do it.

Take care,

A.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
thankyou anna & well done ..... the dp anx was ok to deal with but my main problem is the thought of having panic attacks ... this is when i started to isolate ..... im going to cook some dinner & come back a little later so i can give my focus 100% :)
 
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