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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hello all,
(This is my story. Yes, I use God in this. you don't have to believe what I believe. These are my own personal opinions.)

I would like to start off by saying that I am a DP/DR sufferer.
I would also like to say that I've been cured from it and I'm currently relapsed.
I've been on a road to hell and back, twice.
Let me tell you that fighting it twice is worse than fighting it once.
The first time this happened to me I was 8 years old.
I vomited on the bathroom floor and suffered a severe panic attack which brought me into a depression.
I battled DP/DR for 5 years. In that time,I fully recovered. I don't know how or why. But I regained control of my life.
Everything seemed free and fresh. Nothing could stop me from actively and aggressively seeking my future.
Let me say, these were the best feelings I've ever experienced.
My life, was complete.

Currently, I am a student at Xavier University in Cincinnati and an undergraduate business major.
Two weeks ago. I did something I regret.
I regret it so much because it caused a relapse.
I had just broke up with my girlfriend of two and a half years and I was slightly depressed.
I went to my "friends" house to hang out.
I said "hey, do you guys wanna smoke some weed?"
They said sure and I smoked for the first time.
Nothing happened.
The next weekend I got drunk at a huge party.
We smoked weed and yet again nothing happened.

..Now the good/bad part

A week later, 2 friends and I went to a hookah bar and at 3 in the morning came back to the dorms and got in my car.
We parked in a lot and this is what happened.
We smoked in front of my friends house.
When I started getting high,
I had a massive panic attack.
I think I had a total of 6 separate attacks.
I blacked out maybe 8 times.
I was literally "tripping."
I went back to the dorm room in a state of panic and fell asleep.
More like "blacked out"..
The next morning I was still high..
I don't remember anything.. sitting in bed.
Thinking about my life.
What is life I kept asking?
Am I here?
Am I really me?
And finally the kicker, "Who is me?"

I walked aimlessly through the school halls literally searching for something.
What am I searching for!!??
But yet I cannot explain anything..

Luck was at hand, as I had my spring break last week and had a time to lay on the couch and do nothing.
I lost weight, couldn't sleep, felt insecure and got the night sweats.
I literally had withdraw symptoms..
I didn't tell anyone what had happened.

I'm back at school now and I started my schedule again this week.
Nothing seems real.
I started to panic.
I started to pray.
I went to church.
I ate even though I wasn't hungry.
I felt like I lost control.
This Tuesday I really lost my marbles as they say.
I went on a jog. I ran about a mile and ended up falling over in the middle of a soccer field.
God, please save me I prayed. I need you. Please God. Oh god please! Anyone!
I was crying out.
Just then my phone rang.
It was my sister.
She said, "Michael are you ok?"
I couldn't believe she called me. I told her what had happened. Everything.
She told me to come over.
I got in my car and drove about 100 mph to her appt.
Something inside of me started screaming out.
"GET OUT OF ME!" "GET OUT" "I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!"
I cried like I've never cried before.
It was like I lost complete control.
I cried for almost 10 minutes.
I don't know how long. It seems unreal.
I pulled into my sisters apartment and walked in with tears in my eyes.
She hugged me.
I stayed the night on her couch and came back to school in the morning.
I've been praying, working hard. And this thing. This monster keeps coming back to me.
It's evil. It truly is.

And as I'm writing this. I'm getting the goosebumps.
Because I remember being this way once before.
And I also had a flashback to when I decided to cure myself when I was 8.
And today, I'm starting my treatment again.
I's called.. a hope for a better future, a better tomorrow, a better today.
It's called faith, reason and understanding.
It's called finding yourself and being happy.

And I know that it works for me because I've been down this road before.
And I might be paddling upstream to get to where I was.
But I know I will get there.
There is a cure to all you non-believers.
The sooner you realize this the sooner you'll be cured.
I know what it is.
I'm starting it right now.
And I've been doing it my whole life without knowing it.
You have been to. But knowing it and doing it are two different things.

These are your weapons to fight a monster.
1. Faith
2. Choice
3. Positive thinking
4. Meditation
5. Visualization

Like I said in the beginning, these are my own opinions and tactics.

But here's the explanation. (Notice the order)

1: Faith: God is real because you are real. Case closed.

2: Choice: You have a choice to do right or wrong. You did wrong, now make the right choice.

3: Positive thinking: Now you know you have choice, make the choice to think positively

4: Meditation: Relax, cover your eyes with a cold rag. Lay back. Take three deep breaths. and relax every muscle in your body. Focus on you and your mind. Clear your mind and only think about the future.

5: Visualize: The saying goes that "manifestation follows visualization." Visualize yourself happy and content with your life.
Visualize god standing near your and protecting you. Relax you eyes and let the feelings of tension and frustration or anything else your feeling go.

I started this on spring break.
Where I was and wear I am now has greatly improved.
Your situation is not going to magically change over night.
But it's not going to change without change..
I'm suffering but that suffering will end.
Instead of saying that you "feel" like your suffering will never end.
Say, I "believe my suffering will end"
The more you feel the less you believe.

This is my story.
Yes I've recovered.
Yes I'm back to where I started.
And I hope that my hope and inspiration along with positive thinking
help to give you a "piece of mind"

I'm willing to talk via PM or email

Hope and inspiration to all,
Michael
 

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Hello all,
(This is my story. Yes, I use God in this. you don't have to believe what I believe. These are my own personal opinions.)

I would like to start off by saying that I am a DP/DR sufferer.
I would also like to say that I've been cured from it and I'm currently relapsed.
I've been on a road to hell and back, twice.
Let me tell you that fighting it twice is worse than fighting it once.
The first time this happened to me I was 8 years old.
I vomited on the bathroom floor and suffered a severe panic attack which brought me into a depression.
I battled DP/DR for 5 years. In that time,I fully recovered. I don't know how or why. But I regained control of my life.
Everything seemed free and fresh. Nothing could stop me from actively and aggressively seeking my future.
Let me say, these were the best feelings I've ever experienced.
My life, was complete.

Currently, I am a student at Xavier University in Cincinnati and an undergraduate business major.
Two weeks ago. I did something I regret.
I regret it so much because it caused a relapse.
I had just broke up with my girlfriend of two and a half years and I was slightly depressed.
I went to my "friends" house to hang out.
I said "hey, do you guys wanna smoke some weed?"
They said sure and I smoked for the first time.
Nothing happened.
The next weekend I got drunk at a huge party.
We smoked weed and yet again nothing happened.

..Now the good/bad part

A week later, 2 friends and I went to a hookah bar and at 3 in the morning came back to the dorms and got in my car.
We parked in a lot and this is what happened.
We smoked in front of my friends house.
When I started getting high,
I had a massive panic attack.
I think I had a total of 6 separate attacks.
I blacked out maybe 8 times.
I was literally "tripping."
I went back to the dorm room in a state of panic and fell asleep.
More like "blacked out"..
The next morning I was still high..
I don't remember anything.. sitting in bed.
Thinking about my life.
What is life I kept asking?
Am I here?
Am I really me?
And finally the kicker, "Who is me?"

I walked aimlessly through the school halls literally searching for something.
What am I searching for!!??
But yet I cannot explain anything..

Luck was at hand, as I had my spring break last week and had a time to lay on the couch and do nothing.
I lost weight, couldn't sleep, felt insecure and got the night sweats.
I literally had withdraw symptoms..
I didn't tell anyone what had happened.

I'm back at school now and I started my schedule again this week.
Nothing seems real.
I started to panic.
I started to pray.
I went to church.
I ate even though I wasn't hungry.
I felt like I lost control.
This Tuesday I really lost my marbles as they say.
I went on a jog. I ran about a mile and ended up falling over in the middle of a soccer field.
God, please save me I prayed. I need you. Please God. Oh god please! Anyone!
I was crying out.
Just then my phone rang.
It was my sister.
She said, "Michael are you ok?"
I couldn't believe she called me. I told her what had happened. Everything.
She told me to come over.
I got in my car and drove about 100 mph to her appt.
Something inside of me started screaming out.
"GET OUT OF ME!" "GET OUT" "I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!"
I cried like I've never cried before.
It was like I lost complete control.
I cried for almost 10 minutes.
I don't know how long. It seems unreal.
I pulled into my sisters apartment and walked in with tears in my eyes.
She hugged me.
I stayed the night on her couch and came back to school in the morning.
I've been praying, working hard. And this thing. This monster keeps coming back to me.
It's evil. It truly is.

And as I'm writing this. I'm getting the goosebumps.
Because I remember being this way once before.
And I also had a flashback to when I decided to cure myself when I was 8.
And today, I'm starting my treatment again.
I's called.. a hope for a better future, a better tomorrow, a better today.
It's called faith, reason and understanding.
It's called finding yourself and being happy.

And I know that it works for me because I've been down this road before.
And I might be paddling upstream to get to where I was.
But I know I will get there.
There is a cure to all you non-believers.
The sooner you realize this the sooner you'll be cured.
I know what it is.
I'm starting it right now.
And I've been doing it my whole life without knowing it.
You have been to. But knowing it and doing it are two different things.

These are your weapons to fight a monster.
1. Faith
2. Choice
3. Positive thinking
4. Meditation
5. Visualization

Like I said in the beginning, these are my own opinions and tactics.

But here's the explanation. (Notice the order)

1: Faith: God is real because you are real. Case closed.

2: Choice: You have a choice to do right or wrong. You did wrong, now make the right choice.

3: Positive thinking: Now you know you have choice, make the choice to think positively

4: Meditation: Relax, cover your eyes with a cold rag. Lay back. Take three deep breaths. and relax every muscle in your body. Focus on you and your mind. Clear your mind and only think about the future.

5: Visualize: The saying goes that "manifestation follows visualization." Visualize yourself happy and content with your life.
Visualize god standing near your and protecting you. Relax you eyes and let the feelings of tension and frustration or anything else your feeling go.

I started this on spring break.
Where I was and wear I am now has greatly improved.
Your situation is not going to magically change over night.
But it's not going to change without change..
I'm suffering but that suffering will end.
Instead of saying that you "feel" like your suffering will never end.
Say, I "believe my suffering will end"
The more you feel the less you believe.

This is my story.
Yes I've recovered.
Yes I'm back to where I started.
And I hope that my hope and inspiration along with positive thinking
help to give you a "piece of mind"

I'm willing to talk via PM or email

Hope and inspiration to all,
Michael
Hii may we speak? :)
 
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