[portuguesedude]

Honestly, idk where to start. My head is always thinking about something. All the time. I've got constantly worries going thro my head. And the worse is, it seems I can´t control this. Idk when the DP symptoms started precisely, but the truth is since two months ago I feel I'm living a dream, every day. I know, I guess this will sound a joke to you, "just two months? I'm suffering for years..." but this whole experience is new to me and it was fucking scary at the beginning. I think this whole bullshit started not for smoking cannabis (numb 2007), but probably because of anxiety attacks, panic attacks, w/e. I just wanted to be a child again, nothing to worry about. Now, when I get up, the first thing that comes to my mind is "How am I? Have I any symptoms or something?". Then the exams always pressuring me, I want to be happy, and I have happy moments, but it's like I am not living it. I'm not there. It's hard to focus, besides lights (even the sunlight) started to obfuscate me, just like being in a place with many people (actually this one always did, since I was a little kid). I've got to say, in the beginning, my worries were if I had some kind of disease like heart problems or even cancer. Of course, to add to my asthma. But apparently not. I didn't conform myself at that time. I still don't. And I still don't get it, I'm young, but my head is always thinking about something (usually bad things). People tell me that I will get better when I fell in love with someone. What do you think? Does DP have a cure?

P.S: My username is quite suggesting, let me know If I committed any lexical or orthographical error.

 

[Wendy]

Welcome to the community!

I'm sorry you're going through all this. I can relate to many of the problems that you're facing currently. I've had anxiety for a big portion of my life as well as hypochondria as it relates to cancer.

Just know that you aren't alone. There are plenty of people within this community that have faced similar issues to yours. Here are some sub-forums that might help, as well as our most popular post:

• Managing Depersonalization and Derealization
• Recovery Stories
• The Holy Grail of Curing Depersonalization

Also, don't feel as though you sound like a joke. Some people suffer for hours while others might for years. The time that you've spent with this condition doesn't determine anything. You are welcome here no matter what!