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Hi Guys,

I'm new here, and my English is not very good, so now you know. I'm a 22 year old guy from Holland.

Since a little more than a year from now, I suffer from derealization. It started when I participated in a concentration experiment/study. I had to concentrate very hard for a very long time. After the study, I started feeling disconnected and very unreal. Everything seemed so dreamy around me. It was like i was on drugs or something. Before I participated, i was slightly depressed. My self image has been pretty low, and so my self-esteem, I also was having lots of stress. Ever since I participated on the study, I feel weird. My symptoms seem to point at derealization. The world has become less 3d, less real, and less awesome. I feel like i'm stuck in my head. It's very hard to explain how I really feel, because 'feeling' has become different for me.

Now, I'm still kinda struggling with it. I still feel disconnected and i'm having a hard time at school. I find social contact harder and less fun than before. Sometimes I try to run away from social interactions. I find it harder to express myself. It's hard for me to laugh genuinely (Most of the time, my laugh is kinda forced). It's weird and i feel uncomfortable with it. It's like i'm too conscious about my own expressions. I want to be in the moment again, laugh and talk, without feeling weird and insecure all the time. I'm trying different methods to be more in the moment, like mindfulness exercises and meditation. I think my stress levels and tension in my head are still very high.

Although it's not that clear, because the derealization makes the feelings less intense, i think. I can't concentrate very well, because I suffer from ADD. Since the derealization, the ADD has gotten way worse. I'm having a very hard time understanding conversations and movies. I also find it very very hard to read (and memorise what i just read). My memory has also gotten worse. I'm seeing a psychologist and a therapist. I don't really know if it's helping me, but I think i'll just go with it. If anyone has any tips or anything that could be useful for me, please let me know!

Thank you! :)

Greetings Thijs
 

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Welcome to the site, Thijs! :)

Depression and anxiety seem to be big causes in Depersonalization, the experiment that you were included in may have acted as a push in the direction of unreality. So, in my opinion, I think lowering your stress levels as much as you can would promote a healthier perspective on life and help you to recover from Depersonalization. Other than that, all the symptoms that you've provided are very textbook to this disorder, so don't worry so much if there's something else wrong with you. When people get Depersonalization, they exacerbate their symptoms by believing they have a worse illness, but that's simply not the case - so, be wary of how you think about your symptoms.

The psychologist and mindfulness are very good aspects to recovery. Some people say that meditation yields different results, I'm a bit indifferent on the subject, but if it's helping you with your ailment, then by all means continue. If you have any questions or concerns, you're free to post around the site as much as you'd like, we have a huge community here that is very happy to help people in similar situations! I hope that everything gets better for you soon, welcome to the site again, and best of luck!
 

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Hey Solomon, thanks for your reply. I will try to lower my stress levels as much as possible. I have to go to school though. If I have any questions, i'll let you know :) thanks

Welcome to the site, Thijs! :)

Depression and anxiety seem to be big causes in Depersonalization, the experiment that you were included in may have acted as a push in the direction of unreality. So, in my opinion, I think lowering your stress levels as much as you can would promote a healthier perspective on life and help you to recover from Depersonalization. Other than that, all the symptoms that you've provided are very textbook to this disorder, so don't worry so much if there's something else wrong with you. When people get Depersonalization, they exacerbate their symptoms by believing they have a worse illness, but that's simply not the case - so, be wary of how you think about your symptoms.

The psychologist and mindfulness are very good aspects to recovery. Some people say that meditation yields different results, I'm a bit indifferent on the subject, but if it's helping you with your ailment, then by all means continue. If you have any questions or concerns, you're free to post around the site as much as you'd like, we have a huge community here that is very happy to help people in similar situations! I hope that everything gets better for you soon, welcome to the site again, and best of luck!
 
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