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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Today I have cried a million tears. I lost a wonderful friend, this was a friend I told all my troubles to, she listened well, never judged me, always accepted me no matter what the mood. At times when this illness had it's ugly grip on me she would purrr and snuggle up to me to let me know I always had a true friend. She was my cat, a beautiful proud cat, I had her for sixteen years. A long time. I love animals I always think god gave us animals to hold when we felt alone. They true are precious. I have lost loved ones this year due to cancer and to have her go to truly tugs at the heart strings. It made me realize something though, something I have always known but never really said it, this world revolves around love, without it I feel we are lost souls. Sometimes I wonder if depersonalization has something to do with trying to shut out feelings, when we lose something or someone maybe dp/dr is our way of coping with the pain that loving can give. To my dear little friend I will always hold you in my heart you were a loyal precious gift from god.

gem.
 
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Dearest Gem,
My heart goes out to you SO much...I am also an animal lover, and my dog has helped me in this life more than anyone could imagine.

They know, our beloved pets. They know that they are Number One in our hearts (that's why they can be so darn COCKY!, lol) and I am positive that your beloved cat-friend knew how much deeply you cared.

Love lasts. Forever. You can never feel as hopeless as you once did once you've deeply loved someone (or pet).

Again, my deepest and most sincere condolences. I know. I do.

And your cat was very very lucky to have had such love.

Peace,
Janine
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your support it is so nice to know there is somewhere to go when you feel sad and just need a shoulder to lean on. I have had enough grief this year to last me a lifetime, but knowing there is a place like here to come to where you are not judged and it is okay to share the good and bad times makes my heart smile. Thank you again.

gem.
 
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sorry about your loss Gem, R.I.P. to your cat

i know im pretty attatched to my own cat, she sleeps in my room every night. Its weird because when i had my initial breakdown shortly after my cat, well one of them, kind of always came around me & would sit on my lap or come in my room at night, its like she knew that something was wrong & wanted to bring me some comfort. My mom realized this to, My dad often says that the cat is a reincarnation of my grandmother ( his mother) who i was close to as a young child, but unfortunatly she passed away when i was like 5 or 6.

The thing im getting worried about in terms of all of this, is i don't know how im going to be able to handle tragic events in my current mental state. I mean im not expecting anything to happen any time soon, but what if something does? I have no idea how i would be able to handle it in my current situation. I have a close cousin in the military and i pray he won't have to go to the Iraq mess & i also worry about my grandparents cuz they are getting older. I think being an only child makes me more attatched to things cuz i don't have any blood brothers or sisters. Ok im babbling on now, but once again sorry for your loss Gem.

Peace
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Soulbrotha, thank you for your support, I really appreciate it. I agree with you I believe animals know when their owner is upset. My cat always cuddled up with me, she was very loving. She seemed to know when I was sad. They are a great comfort. It is very hard to lose someone you love. I have lost alot of people in the last two years. It seems I just learn to deal with one loss and another came. I comforted a family member and a very dear friend for months while they battled cancer and it was very hard. I feel overwhelmed with grief lately, but I am a strong person, I will work through it, time is the only healer, the pain may not leave but it gets a bit easier as the days go by. Thank you again for your kindness.

GEM.
 

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Gem, I am sorry for your loss. I know when I've had bad panic attacks and can't stand to be around anyone, I will go lay down beside my dog (he's a miniature schnauzer) and cuddle with him, and my anxiety lessens. He's almost 13 and I almost lost him earlier this year so I know the pain. Also I want to say that you sound like a very strong person to have gone through all these tragedies and you keep your head up high and keep truckin. You should be proud of yourself. Take care Gem and you know we(the people on this board) are always here for you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
enngirl5, thank you for your heartfelt words. Anxiety attacks are so draining, I used to have many of those. Not so much anymore. The dp seems to have taken over those. I appreciate you taking the time to reply to my post. You have a friend here also.

gem.
 
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Gem, your words are so touching about your dear cat coming to be with you when you felt very bad. (and SoulBro, too....that's so charming and precious)

My dog does the same exact thing, and what really amazes me is that he has a great Truth Meter. When I was very ill awhile back with a ruptured appendix, and recovering in bed after getting out of the hospital, he was so understanding and he would just lie by my head and kiss me.

He'd come sit at my feet, not insist on being on my lap (which was impossible re my abdomen) and he didn't push me for walks, etc. (he is a small dog and is also paper trained, so he doesn't NEED to go outside, just enjoys it)

It was so touching.

Then....after I healed and was doing FINE, he somehow knew the difference. If I want to sleep late, etc. and try to lie in bed after 8 in the morning, he has none of that, lol...he will leap over my body, run around my head in little circles, lick my ears (well, stick his tongue INTO my ears, lol) and in short, give me NO peace till I get up and take him for a good long morning walk.

How? How did this little guy know the difference when I was really ill and needed my rest?

Animal friends are better than angels.

Peace,
Janine
 

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Gem, I'm so sorry for your loss. The 'grief experts' have finally recognized that the loss of a companion animal is as traumatic as the loss of a person. Something we pet lovers have known all along.

There is a book called "Pet Loss" by Herbert A. Nieburg, PhD & Arlene Fischer that's quite a good book on dealing with grief. It talks about the various stages: numbness, anger, depression, guilt, etc. I probably should have paid more attention to it myself. The loss of my beloved little cat, Misha, was the trigger for my DP.

We never do forget them. I still have occasional dreams about my dog, Schnookers, who's now been gone for 26 years. Always good dreams, we play in the Elysian Fields.

My thoughts and deepest sympathy are with you

Carole
 

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Im sorry for your loss. In many ways animals are better than people. Let those tears out.
 
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Hi Gem,

I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss.
16 years is a long time to have such a dear friend.

Agree whole heartedly about animals.Such wonderful unconditional love.

It will take some time to heal,Gem.
My thoughts are with you,sweet one :cry:

Love Shelly
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
I would like to take this moment to thank all of you who responded to my post. You all helped me so much. I do feel alot of grief from losing a dear friend. I must have cried a million tears, I think it is also because I have lost family members this year as well and my heart felt heavy. I think it was very kind of all of you to show your support. Your kind words are very comforting. From the bottom of my heart thank you.

gem.
 
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