[enna]

Hi!!
I am severly afraid of going crazy. For the past week this has been my biggest obsession, feeling like im going to go insane, dissociating and lots of panic. But today has been a scary day. I was outside and i saw my mailbox in the corner of my eye, but i jumped a little, because i thought it was a person. Today I have been very scared of seeing things, everything i see in the corner of my eye, every dark thing, i turn around and get scared that its a hallucination. Has anyone else experienced this? I am constantly on edge, feeling like any moment I will see or hear something.

 

[NoDevils]

Do you need corrective vision and are you wearing your vision aids?

I don't advise waiting to see if you become schizophrenic. You can actually trigger a psychosis by being too wound up and anxious for too long, and even then you wouldn't necessarily have your answer as to whether or not you're going "crazy."

 

[eLJay]

During my first time I had very vivid closed eye visuals in addition to "corner of the eye" hallucinations. If you were to become actually psychotic you wouldn't recognize the hallucinations as such. I don't think it's very likely to trigger a psychosis by being too wound up if you don't have a history of psychosis.

 

[NoDevils]

During my first time I had very vivid closed eye visuals in addition to "corner of the eye" hallucinations. If you were to become actually psychotic you wouldn't recognize the hallucinations as such. I don't think it's very likely to trigger a psychosis by being too wound up if you don't have a history of psychosis.

Psychosis are often classified by severity and duration. A "true" psychosis is like what you said, having hallucinations or delusions and thinking they might be real. Short of that there are "psychotic" experiences like confusion, paranoia, hallucination but knowing it's not real.

Secondly, there's a major difference between brief psychosis and schizophrenia. Schizophrenia is classified by a long term psychosis lasting months. However, a person can be tentatively diagnosed with schizophrenia rather easily because the success of psychiatric interventions is somewhat contingent on whether or not the disorder was adequately treated in its prodromal phrase.

I have witnessed on this forum people driving themselves up the wall, self included, and saying things that are incoherent or don't make sense. This doesn't mean they have schizophrenia. One of the main functions of this forum is to dispel fears and myths that depersonalization is necessarily an indicator of schizophrenia.

 

[eLJay]

the success of psychiatric interventions is somewhat contingent on whether or not the disorder was adequately treated in its prodromal phrase

Typically during the prodromal phase only monitoring and supportive measures in the form of psychotherapy are provided since the conversion rate even for people categorized CHR/UHR (clinical/ultra high risk) is below 50%. As far as I know schizophrenia is not tentatively diagnosed, the reason for prodrome monitoring is to reduce the delay until initial treatment if and only if the patient converts, increasing the odds of recovery.

 

[NoDevils]

Typically during the prodromal phase only monitoring and supportive measures in the form of psychotherapy are provided since the conversion rate even for people categorized CHR/UHR (clinical/ultra high risk) is below 50%. As far as I know schizophrenia is not tentatively diagnosed, the reason for prodrome monitoring is to reduce the delay until initial treatment if and only if the patient converts, increasing the odds of recovery.

Yeah that sounds like a much better protocol than the free for all most patients around the world are familiar with. There are a lot of people on here who were diagnosed schizophrenic off the cuff and then proceeded to spiral into panic about it. If I went around to clinicians and told them I have depersonalization I think a third would diagnose me schizo. I think good treatment like you're describing does happen outside of Germany but it's really at the discretion of doctors and social workers to do their job well or just pelt people with drugs and show them the door.

Definitely the majority of DPSH users don't have schizophrenia diagnoses but I have watched several of us spiral into total incoherence. Some come back from that brink and others don't.

Enna seems to be experiencing excessive self-analysis like, "What if I'm going crazy," which just fuels anxiety which further fuels the perception of going crazy.

 

[enna]

Yeah that sounds like a much better protocol than the free for all most patients around the world are familiar with. There are a lot of people on here who were diagnosed schizophrenic off the cuff and then proceeded to spiral into panic about it. If I went around to clinicians and told them I have depersonalization I think a third would diagnose me schizo. I think good treatment like you're describing does happen outside of Germany but it's really at the discretion of doctors and social workers to do their job well or just pelt people with drugs and show them the door.

Definitely the majority of DPSH users don't have schizophrenia diagnoses but I have watched several of us spiral into total incoherence. Some come back from that brink and others don't.

Enna seems to be experiencing excessive self-analysis like, "What if I'm going crazy," which just fuels anxiety which further fuels the perception of going crazy.

I have OCD and GAD, so "what if" thoughts are a 247 thing for me. I believe this is my OCD having a flare up, but that small part of me believes I will lose my mind

 

[eLJay]

Yeah that sounds like a much better protocol than the free for all most patients around the world are familiar with. There are a lot of people on here who were diagnosed schizophrenic off the cuff and then proceeded to spiral into panic about it. If I went around to clinicians and told them I have depersonalization I think a third would diagnose me schizo. I think good treatment like you're describing does happen outside of Germany but it's really at the discretion of doctors and social workers to do their job well or just pelt people with drugs and show them the door.

Definitely the majority of DPSH users don't have schizophrenia diagnoses but I have watched several of us spiral into total incoherence. Some come back from that brink and others don't.

Enna seems to be experiencing excessive self-analysis like, "What if I'm going crazy," which just fuels anxiety which further fuels the perception of going crazy.

What I wrote is not an anecdote from my country but the scientific consensus that everyone can find reading studies and analyses on pubmed, sadly practical reality looks different, regardless of the country, which is why it's important to be informed and advocate for yourself.

 

[NoDevils]

I have OCD and GAD, so "what if" thoughts are a 247 thing for me. I believe this is my OCD having a flare up, but that small part of me believes I will lose my mind

Yeah I remember your previous thread was a very similar concern about having a normal perceptual phenomenon and then wondering if it was a sign you were going insane. You have depersonalization and OCD? Which bothers you more? I think it's possible to get used to depersonalization. You actually seem a little bit used to having OCD.

What I wrote is not an anecdote from my country but the scientific consensus that everyone can find reading studies and analyses on pubmed, sadly practical reality looks different, regardless of the country, which is why it's important to be informed and advocate for yourself.

Yeah. Well, good practices are definitely not distributed evenly in terms of geography. It would be nice if more practitioners could at least be bothered to go on Google. When I tell my current treatment providers anything about depersonalization they react like it's an obscure syndrome and either stare blankly at me or say some therapist reply they keep in the chamber for moments where they don't know what to say. My gut tells me depersonalization is the most neglected mental health symptom. At least it's possible to function with depersonalization.

I have been getting an off-label treatment protocol for anxiety and post-traumatic stress, and it took me about five prescribers to get even that. My previous prescriber put me on Strattera even though I said SSRIs/SNRIs don't agree with me. I wouldn't say Strattera is an appropriate treatment for complex post-traumatic stress. Self-advocacy is definitely important.

 

[enna]

Yeah I remember your previous thread was a very similar concern about having a normal perceptual phenomenon and then wondering if it was a sign you were going insane. You have depersonalization and OCD? Which bothers you more? I think it's possible to get used to depersonalization. You actually seem a little bit used to having OCD.



Yeah. Well, good practices are definitely not distributed evenly in terms of geography. It would be nice if more practitioners could at least be bothered to go on Google. When I tell my current treatment providers anything about depersonalization they react like it's an obscure syndrome and either stare blankly at me or say some therapist reply they keep in the chamber for moments where they don't know what to say. My gut tells me depersonalization is the most neglected mental health symptom. At least it's possible to function with depersonalization.

I have been getting an off-label treatment protocol for anxiety and post-traumatic stress, and it took me about five prescribers to get even that. My previous prescriber put me on Strattera even though I said SSRIs/SNRIs don't agree with me. I wouldn't say Strattera is an appropriate treatment for complex post-traumatic stress. Self-advocacy is definitely important.

I got diagnosed with OCD when I was 11, so yeah, I suppose ive gotten used to it. I struggle with DP sometimes, its not a 247 feeling. When the anxiety or existental thoughts hit, thats what triggers my DP. My OCD bothers me more for suree.
Actually now my fear has moved from seeing things, to hearing things. I analyze every single noise I hear and panic if it was a hallucination

 

[NoDevils]

I got diagnosed with OCD when I was 11, so yeah, I suppose ive gotten used to it. I struggle with DP sometimes, its not a 247 feeling. When the anxiety or existental thoughts hit, thats what triggers my DP. My OCD bothers me more for suree.
Actually now my fear has moved from seeing things, to hearing things. I analyze every single noise I hear and panic if it was a hallucination

How do you feel about your appointment the other day where the therapist said it looks like OCD and not schizophrenia? You said she laughed. I know people with mental health problems can be of two minds where they realize a compulsion or worry doesn't make sense but they keep doing it anyway because another part of their mind thinks it's necessary.

ELJay made a post where he described a time he was hallucinating but maintained a fairly sober thought process and didn't develop schizophrenia. Sometimes these are called dissociative hallucinations. Many people hallucinate when they listen to white noise or are sleep deprived.

How I recovered from derealization

Hi everyone, in late 2009 I was 18 years old and had been smoking weed daily for a couple of years already, I was also rather experienced with a bunch of other common and not so common drugs. One winter evening I took some alleged MDMA (not the first time) in combination with weed and alcohol...

www.dpselfhelp.com

Basically, if you were having a hallucination it wouldn't be a surefire sign that you've gone insane. People can be legally and clinically sane and yet have hallucinations.

 

[Trith]

How do you feel about your appointment the other day where the therapist said it looks like OCD and not schizophrenia? You said she laughed. I know people with mental health problems can be of two minds where they realize a compulsion or worry doesn't make sense but they keep doing it anyway because another part of their mind thinks it's necessary.

ELJay made a post where he described a time he was hallucinating but maintained a fairly sober thought process and didn't develop schizophrenia. Sometimes these are called dissociative hallucinations. Many people hallucinate when they listen to white noise or are sleep deprived.

How I recovered from derealization

Hi everyone, in late 2009 I was 18 years old and had been smoking weed daily for a couple of years already, I was also rather experienced with a bunch of other common and not so common drugs. One winter evening I took some alleged MDMA (not the first time) in combination with weed and alcohol...

www.dpselfhelp.com

Basically, if you were having a hallucination it wouldn't be a surefire sign that you've gone insane. People can be legally and clinically sane and yet have hallucinations.

That's true. Exactly when I am a bit sleep deprived, if I hear strong ventilation or other type of white noise, I often hear either a crying baby, a barking dog or a alarm, buried in the noise, and very faint.
But I don't think it counts as a hallucination in the psychosis sense.

 

[enna]

How do you feel about your appointment the other day where the therapist said it looks like OCD and not schizophrenia? You said she laughed. I know people with mental health problems can be of two minds where they realize a compulsion or worry doesn't make sense but they keep doing it anyway because another part of their mind thinks it's necessary.

ELJay made a post where he described a time he was hallucinating but maintained a fairly sober thought process and didn't develop schizophrenia. Sometimes these are called dissociative hallucinations. Many people hallucinate when they listen to white noise or are sleep deprived.

How I recovered from derealization

Hi everyone, in late 2009 I was 18 years old and had been smoking weed daily for a couple of years already, I was also rather experienced with a bunch of other common and not so common drugs. One winter evening I took some alleged MDMA (not the first time) in combination with weed and alcohol...

www.dpselfhelp.com

Basically, if you were having a hallucination it wouldn't be a surefire sign that you've gone insane. People can be legally and clinically sane and yet have hallucinations.

I for sure felt relief when she laughed, made me feel like i am indeed just anxious. She isnt an OCD therapist, so i actually am not sure how well she can help me with this. But yeah, it felt like a big relief. I have an appointment tomorrow, so i will cry about this to her.
exactly as u said, its like i have two minds. the other side knows that my chances of "going crazy" are not very high, but the other one thinks i have already lost touch with reality. But i dont believe ive been hallucinating. Its just feels like i am hyper aware of everything that is going on around me, and i notice sounds and things i normally wouldnt even care about

 

[Weirdo25]

Hi!!
I am severly afraid of going crazy. For the past week this has been my biggest obsession, feeling like im going to go insane, dissociating and lots of panic. But today has been a scary day. I was outside and i saw my mailbox in the corner of my eye, but i jumped a little, because i thought it was a person. Today I have been very scared of seeing things, everything i see in the corner of my eye, every dark thing, i turn around and get scared that its a hallucination. Has anyone else experienced this? I am constantly on edge, feeling like any moment I will see or hear something.

wow- no yeah ive seen these things, always from the corner of my eye and as i turn to face the they just fade away- i didint know other had this too!

 

[forestx5]

One early morning I was driving to work after a night of drinking and little sleep. The streets were wet and the street lights were casting strange shadows. I thought I saw a small dwarf like figure on the side of the road. It reminded me of something out of the movie "Phantasm". I wanted to look back to convince myself it was just a fire hydrant or something, but I was too scared to look. . I got the hell out of there. lol I did have an honest to goodness audio hallucination. I had been suffering insomnia with a depressive episode and I was lying in bed resting when I heard a loud explosion at the side of my bed. It sounded like a grenade or cherry bomb going off. It wasn't overly frightening, but it was very odd. Several years later I was reading a book on anxiety by Claire Weeks. In it, she described this phenomena and called it "exploding head syndrome". It described what I had experienced very accurately. It also said it sometimes happens at the end of a period of insomnia, which also correlated to my experience. I think it is explained as a hypnogogic hallucination, ie., something that happens in the nether region between sleep and wake. Some people report seeing a leprechaun like creature on their chests. I'll take the noise any day.