[yesemina]

So, I was doing alright for a while but I had another panic attack. It leaves me feeling out of control of myself and the anxiety is just right there and it's just really hard to not sink down again.

I have barely been able to sleep or eat for a few days, and I can't exercise, which gets me even more down. I get so overwhelmed sometimes I just want to cry, and I worry that my anxious mind will get the best of me. But my fatigue is contributing to my anxiety, and possibly that 25 mg of zoloft isn't enough. I don't know.

Now when I thought of panic attacks I used to think of them as very brief, lasting a few minutes or so. Well I am always on the edge of panic now when I have my setbacks, and my anxiety is SO high, for pretty much the entire day.

I know I should do my best to go in a different direction and not feed my anxiety, but sometimes this gets SO difficult I can barely handle it, and my thoughts go obsessive to the max. Any suggestions/comments/anything?

 

[jake]

I can sure relate to you. For me, I lose trust when "IT" happens again, I get mad, too. It feels like a betrayal of some kind. A slap in the kisser!! But I do know that "anticipatory" anxiety is the kind for me that lingers near the surface, and it's b/cuz I feel like if I watch for panic it it won't get me.It helped me to read very slowly over and over Janines description on here about the RELIEF part. I find it very soothing to read "You will not go over some edge." I can also say you are not alone. I hope this helps a little. And yes ask the doc about meds. Thinking calm, ok, strong thoughts your way.
--jake

 

[yesemina]

I can sure relate to you. For me, I lose trust when "IT" happens again, I get mad, too. It feels like a betrayal of some kind. A slap in the kisser!! But I do know that "anticipatory" anxiety is the kind for me that lingers near the surface, and it's b/cuz I feel like if I watch for panic it it won't get me.It helped me to read very slowly over and over Janines description on here about the RELIEF part. I find it very soothing to read "You will not go over some edge." I can also say you are not alone. I hope this helps a little. And yes ask the doc about meds. Thinking calm, ok, strong thoughts your way.
--jake

Thank you...it's so helpful to know i'm not alone. I have anticipatory anxiety too, it's just sort of right there all the time. It wasn't particularly like this before, but I think this is just another phase of the whole thing. It's worse because I currently have a lot of time on my hands. I'll read Janine's description as well. Thanks again, and I'm thinking strong and calm thoughts your way as well.

 

[Sojourner]

Frankly, my panic was unendurable. I don't know how anyone can tolerate it. When it began in late May, I actually let it go for about four hours one day and thereafter, when I was sure a panic attack was coming, I'd take my .5 mg. Ativan and be done with it. I just cannot tolerate that level of terror and fear. I don't know how anyone can do it.

Of course, I'm kind of the reverse of you, Yes, because four weeks ago today, I stopped taking Zoloft and have had no panic attacks and no depression since then. Of course, I have become embroiled in vitriolic religious fights with every person on this forum :lol: but I have none of the symptoms that brought me here in May. I guess I don't know why I'm still here.

But anyway. My point is only that I tip my hat to anyone who can stand the terror, and it appears that many people just live through it. I could not. It's just unendurable. I know why people jump off buildings or shoot themselves. I might well have done the same if I hadn't the medicine to make it stop. One little .5 mg. Ativan within about an hour made me feel "normal," not drugged, but normal. However, the depression got worse and worse and worse and one day I just stopped everything (my doctor told me to trust my body's messages). Went from 150 mg of Zoloft to zero.

I just wanted to say that I don't know how you all can endure the panic attack. I cannot get my brain around how anyone can endure that horror. I just couldn't.

I think it may be time to leave this place. Why am I here on this list when I have no symptoms anymore?

 

[yesemina]

I just cannot tolerate that level of terror and fear. I don't know how anyone can do it.

I don't know - it's REALLY tough for me. But I also hate the idea of taking any more pills. But, god, I may just have to - we'll see. I'm worried about taking anything physically dependent.

Why did the zoloft give you panic attacks/depression? Any idea?

Also, did you have short-lived panic attacks, or did it come to constant anxiety like me? My attacks aren't really intense, but I just slip into this anxiety in which I stay in for like, days, and it comes in different waves of intensity during the day. I feel like nobody has ever experienced anything like it, even though I'm sure many people have.

I think it may be time to leave this place. Why am I here on this list when I have no symptoms anymore?

Not too long ago you mentioned that you find some of the most intelligent people here. Plus, you seem to be pretty helpful, despite any arguments you may have gotten into. You have responded to many of my posts, in which I greatly appreciate!

This is the best forum I've found yet far. I don't have much DP anymore, but I do have anxiety - yet I haven't found any anxiety boards better or even as good as this one. I just have to make sure not to stay stuck to it. Hehe.

 

[Sojourner]

Yes,

I was on the Zoloft for a long time, and our body's reactions to things changes over time, what with the variation in hormones over our lifetime and so forth. I don't really know in my case what actually happened, but because I was on such a low dose of Zoloft (50 mg), I think it could well have been simply a short-term anxiety that left on its own when Zoloft was completely removed from my system. Unfortunately, my doctor thought, and probably rightly, that the answer to the panic on 50 mg of Zoloft was to INCREASE the Zoloft, but after 6 weeks or so, while I had no anxiety, I had worse depression than I'd ever had. He says it's rare for a person with major depression to suddenly not be depressed, but it's four weeks and counting, and I appear to be "cured" or in remission, at least. Time will tell. If I don't get depressed again within, say, the next year, I will be one of a few "rare" cases, according to my doctor, who had previously had me classified as someone with an "organic disorder" that I would have for the rest of my life. Psychopharmacologists live and learn too! :wink:

But nobody really knows much of anything about these conditions except that sometimes drugs lift depression for some people and sometimes they don't.

My panic was short-lived -- but only after I decided I could not tolerate four hours of it. It probably would have been about that length or longer had I not taken ativan. I never had a worry about addiction because I didn't need to take it every day and it was such a low dose.

I tried the techniques of Claire Weekes. Didn't work.

One thing my sister, who is a physician herself, had suggested to me and I didn't try it because I just could not do it in time was this: when you feel a panic attack coming, run and get a tall glass of water and drink it down as quickly as you can without choking.

For those who are continually getting panic attacks and aren't taking a drug to stop it, it's worth a try.

 

[danilee]

Just want to say, I feel the same. If i am not Dp'd I am anxious or having a panic attack. ITs awful.

I find myself always on edge now with this Dp/DR thing. I used to have an occasional panic attack, and anxiety usually when expected only mine was more severe. NOW I have anxiety all day everyday with bouts of my questions "what are we, why are we here, are we here, is this a dream, is it all going to just end right now, or maybe it all began just now. blah blah blah the questions go through my head to feed my panic, and when I am feeling temporalily (sp?) "better" I realixe that they are just thoughts. BUT when Im feeling out of it, its so bad, I think Ill stop breathing, or im not here anyway. ITs hard to describe what we all feel. The more I visit this board the more I see we are all so much alike, even in the sense that we try to feel like our symptoms are different from everyone else!

Anyway ive rambled, and im done now!

 

[danilee]

Just want to say, I feel the same. If i am not Dp'd I am anxious or having a panic attack. ITs awful.

I find myself always on edge now with this Dp/DR thing. I used to have an occasional panic attack, and anxiety usually when expected only mine was more severe. NOW I have anxiety all day everyday with bouts of my questions "what are we, why are we here, are we here, is this a dream, is it all going to just end right now, or maybe it all began just now. blah blah blah the questions go through my head to feed my panic, and when I am feeling temporalily (sp?) "better" I realixe that they are just thoughts. BUT when Im feeling out of it, its so bad, I think Ill stop breathing, or im not here anyway. ITs hard to describe what we all feel. The more I visit this board the more I see we are all so much alike, even in the sense that we try to feel like our symptoms are different from everyone else!

Anyway ive rambled, and im done now!