Whenever I do things that occupy my mind completely, focus on things, I notice that I feel better. I don' think about my "condition" and just live without worrying about the concept of reality. When I think about DP all day, I feel terrible at the end of it. But when I have a day where I just hang out with friends, socialize, get out of my comfort zone and into the world, I ultimately feel better and, very often, like I'm back to normal again.
Next week will see the start of my first semester at university. I will meet many new people, I will start to have a regular schedule again, go to bed at reasonable times and wake up before dinner has been cooked. I will focus completely on getting a good start, socializing with these new people, trying to live exactly like I did before, without worry. This will be a difficult week, it will be hard and I'm worried that I might collapse at the end of it, but that's something else I need to lay off. I'll try and push those thoughts away, ignore them, lest they become a self-fulfilling prophecy. I don't want to think about DP at all, whenever I notice the thoughts creep up on me I will try and ignore them, like you would ignore a bully at school. I might not always manage, at some point I might look at the bully and say "quit it", but I will do my best to live without succumbing to my thoughts. Because in the end, that's all this is. Thoughts.
I drove to universtity today, and suddenly I was thinking about what the act of driving somewhere meant. I imagined atoms in the form of a human body inside atoms in the form of a car moving across and through other atoms towards more atoms. These thoughts overwhelmed me, but I pushed them aside. I looked at it rationally, that this is what it is, scientifically, and that's nothing to be scared of. I refused my panic from getting the better of me. I sat through my tutorial, payed attention and felt like I was back at school. Maybe I've had DP for longer than I thought, or maybe I'm just tired because I only slept 4 hours. Whatever it may be, i felt strange, but it didn't worry me. I'll take that as a good sign.
This will be a test for me. I hope to pass with flying colours, but I will be content with bottom grades, as long as I do pass. So, thank you for all the help I got from this forum so far. I will be back in a week to tell you how it went. Wish me luck.
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