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i haven't been through labour will been dped.....but did 4 times is truley a painful yet rewarding experience and a child can bring so much well as misery......just cos your dped doesn't mean you need to put your full life on hold...go with the never know having a baby might give you a connection :) [obviously not in karines experience though :( ]

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Hi Angela!

I haven't got any children yet, but eleven years ago, I was pregnant. You'll understand I don't like to talk about this in detail, unless I know somebody really well. Anyway... when my pregnancy terminated, I experienced full-blown labour pains and contractions. I can't lie... it blooming hurt... agony, in fact! I was given pethadine, which helped.

Last year, I experienced exactly the same waves of intense pain, before I had my infected gall bladder removed (It was the size of a small watermelon!). I was given morphine. My step-mother and two of my friends have experienced giving birth and also the pain of gallstones. They all agree that the pain is the same.

Out of approximately 200 women I've spoken to about the pain of giving birth, they ALL said it's a pain you can quickly forget about - especially as you're rewarded with a beautiful, little bundle. I guess this must be true for most women, otherwise they wouldn't go on to have more kiddies, would they?

I know what it's like to suffer broken bones, too. I broke my ankle in Judo. That was terrible agony... Tibia and fibula bones snapped clean through... my foot was just hanging there. Urgh!!!!!!

For me, the agony of labour IS something I can forget, whereas the agony of breaking my leg is something I can't, and that happened 25 years ago! I'd hate to have to go through that again.

Many years ago, I suffered from full-blown panic attacks. I can sympathise with you there, as I know how terrifying they can be. I learnt how to put a stop to them - even when I was in the middle of one - by using the breathing exercises I'd been taught. Eventually I managed to put a stop to them, just as I could feel one coming on. Thankfully, I no longer suffer from them.

The first time I was in agony with my gall bladder, I could feel a whopping panic attack coming on. I have to be honest and say that I found it EXTREMELY difficult to keep my breathing under control, despite how skilled I had become. Mind you, it didn't help that the hospital emergency room was too warm, and that the staff spent two hours doing tests on me before they would give me any painkillers.

However, the following three times I was rushed to hospital, I managed to keep my breathing under control, with the help of a cold mini-fan. Also, because the hospital knew it was my gall bladder, thanks to my records, they gave me morphine within five minutes of me arriving.

So try not to worry about labour. Remember that doctors will give you pain-relieving drugs immediately.

Here's some more positive thinking tips;-

1. You can request a C section beforehand.

2. If you've had a C section on your first child, then doctors usually prefer to deliver your other babies the same way.

3. A very small percentage of women don't feel any pain at all. Try praying that you're one of them! Some babies just 'slip out', with no more discomfort than you'd feel with flatulence!

4. These days, it's very rare to die whilst giving birth!

5. You could have an epidural; You could have gas and air; You could have pethadine; Or you could simply refuse all drugs and instead, scream loudly, whilst grabbing and twisting your partner's goolies! The list of help or tips is endless...

Incidentally, if anyone else reading this post has got some good tips or stories, I would really love to hear them. I could talk about this for days! I especially enjoy reading about the funny things kids say.

My partner, Lance and I are trying for a baby now. I swear to you, Angela, I'm not the slightest bit worried about giving birth. It'll most likely be agony again... yep! But I KNOW I'll be able to cope, and it'll be a small price to pay for such a wonderful, little treasure.

Lance has got two lovely sons, Joseph, 13 and Michael, 11. Michael suffers from ADHD. He often gets picked on, for appearing stupid, so I try my best to get him street-wise. As you can imagine, he loves me to define swear words! Anyway, just over a year ago (when Michael was 9), his mum went into labour at home, but before the ambulance had a chance to arrive, she had given birth on the livingroom carpet!

Michael and Joseph had seen EVERYTHING! At the same time that their step-dad was delivering their little brother, Michael was running around the room, singing, "Now I know where babies come from...!" You can just imagine the scene!

Anyway, before I end this post, I've just got to tell you a quick story about the birth of my God-son, Andrew. His mum was my best school-friend, Lynda. (Tragically, she died nearly 3 years ago.)

Lynda was having a C section. The doctors had secured a sheet up above her waist, so she couldn't see any gore. As soon as Andrew was delivered, Lynda could hear the nurses counting, "One... two...three... four... five... six... one... two... three... four... five... six... "

"Oh, my God!" Lynda thought, "My son's got six fingers and toes!"

All turned out okay, though; the nurses had been counting the surgical instruments, which was a procedure, to check that none had been accidently left inside the patient!

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Discussion Starter · #4 ·

It's sad for me because I gae borth then had DP/DR right after... it hit me hard... :cry:

I don't know what caused really that dp/dr, but it's the worst thing that can happen. You give life and at the same time you feel dead.

Fortunately you're a strong woman, and you already know what is DP/DR, so you won't have it a the delivery! DOn't worry.

About pain, it hurts but not that much. You can always ask for epidural too. Don't read too much horryfing stuff about deliveries, don't see deliveries at TV, you can't prepare yourself to that with those TV shows and it will just scare you for nothing. Please don't scare yourself like I did.

99 % of women are OK on delivery, they don't have depression after, or anxiety.... I wish you luck in the future. I wished so much that it would be like that for me. :(


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835 Posts
i know what you mean. i had an ectopic last spring(painful) and that was around the same time my latest episode of dp started to build. i can't help feeling there was a connection; maybe hormonal. anyway i had the second tube removed at the time and the fear of going back into dp is the main thing stopping me from going for ivf.

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1,146 Posts
Dude...this is nothing but an obsession.

You will have everything you need to handle every situation in the future...but you will have it for WHEN the situation comes, not now.

No way to prepare.

That is a major thing to learn in DP. Being able to be okay with not being prepared for everything. Surrender.

As far as giving birth, there is no way to prepare except that when you are ready you will be fine.

As far as fear of having a panic attack, that is what DP is. fear of fear. You don't KNOW if you're going to have another panic attack. I don't know either. But you know a panic attack lasts for a very short time and in the event you do have one you will have wasted all this time inbetween worrying about it. And you're LESS likely to have a panic attack if you don't worry about having one!

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Angela, my old dutch DR buddy..

I wouldn't worry, this whole 'pain while giving birth' thing is a great big conspiracy to piss men off. If you do get pregnant, once your start having your first contractions a woman from the Institute of Females will appear from nowhere and whisper a terrible secret in your birth is like having a gigantic orgasm ! It's true !! Think about it...women are always moaning (not to me of course, cough) that they want men to have bigger do-da's, and you can't get much bigger than a babys head can you !! So all that thrashing around, screaming and yelling is actually the woman in the throes of a spectacular orgasm. They just tell us men that it's agony as some kind of twisted feminist revenge. :shock:

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Having a baby is the most wonderful precious gift I have ever recieved in my life. To look into the eyes a little one looking back at you. It is part of you, a little miracle. It is true there is pain when in labour and giving birth, but it is a pain that one can tolerate because it is a natural part of life. I did not scream once when giving birth, now I did say a couple of words that are not normally in my everyday vocabulary but that is because I could, it was okay, I was allowed. It is the most precious moment in my entire life. It was not like I had heard from others, it was painful but not a pain that you could not bear. I was suffering from dp/dr when I gave birth and not once did I think of that, I was to busy. When I was having the pain of labour I focused on why I was having the pain and believe me it was work every moment.

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