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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Well Good day guys!

This is the continue version of after few weeks had passed, I did not contact to her for a week and decided to call her for twice last Tuesday but she didn answer my calls and texted me, and image below are our conversations.

[sharedmedia=gallery:albums:89]

She said she looks a little bit better and the feeling had fade away a little after some time, but some of my girl friends suggested to not to contact with her or keep in touch with her at all for about a month and see if she would find me back when she misses me, because in our conversation in the images, she looks like she don't need me at all and she was like completely lost feelings on me. What should i do? Continue keep in touch? or don't keep in touch for a month and see how it goes?

Please give me some advises, thank you so much :(
 

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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
:(
 
G

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It sounds like she's abusing you by not giving you an answer.

I can't imagine how much pain you must be in not knowing what is going to happen with her.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
It sounds like she's abusing you by not giving you an answer.

I can't imagine how much pain you must be in not knowing what is going to happen with her.
I am not really sure as she is completely different, before that she is telling me that if the feeling keep goes round and round, she don't think she can handle the relationship, and she told me before that she loves me so much. But after that, she asked for temporary break as she need a break and suddenly become like this, like we had never been in a relationship before which is quite impossible. Haiz. :(
 

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Whatever she's thinking or feels it's clearly not what you want to hear and you're only hurting yourself by holding onto something that isn't really there.

I don't think she's being particularly deceiving having looked at your conversation. You initiated contact with her and she was being nice to you by telling you that she's doing OK.

You say you want to be her ''friend'' but to me you're her friend for all the wrong reasons, you're her friend in the hope that you will get back together not in the hope that you can help her in what she's going through.

You can't make someone love you or be with you and it's not right to try and deceive them into doing so, if she doesn't want to be with you then you have to accept that (for your own good) and leave her to get on with it and try and get on with your life. I know it hurts and I'm sorry you're going through this.
 

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I didn't have time to respond to your pm the other day, but I'll have a stab at this now. She's hinted that she just wants to be friends many times in the conversation, and that she needs her space. It's important to read between the lines and understand this. If she doesn't reciprocate in certain ways and you notice that you're having to put in a lot of grunt work just to get her to engage with you on any meaningful level, then it's important that you draw your conclusions and do your best to move on. A girl who likes you will show interest and meet you halfway, it's as simple as that. So for now, assume she's not interested and do your own thing. She may just need to come around. I mean, none of us are mind readers, so we can't know for sure, but either way, for the sake of your own mental health, try not to become too attached to any one outcome. She may respect (and desire) you more if you back off and get on with your life.

So she may ultimately come back to you, she may not, but as someone who has been in a lot of relationships, I can say that for now, it doesn't look good. I've always loved women but when it comes to love, they're fickle as shit, and we dumb men just keep hammering away, hoping for definitive answers when there often just aren't any. So try to work on you, and that will put you in a better position for whatever comes next in your (love) life.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
so has she completely recovered? Just ask her straight if she wants to be in a relationship or not. You deserve to get an answer so you know either way. Don't accept being messed around.
I am not really sure but as i know she is getting better and better with her feelings, and before that she did asked for 3 months temporary break, not until 1 month from now.

Whatever she's thinking or feels it's clearly not what you want to hear and you're only hurting yourself by holding onto something that isn't really there.

I don't think she's being particularly deceiving having looked at your conversation. You initiated contact with her and she was being nice to you by telling you that she's doing OK.

You say you want to be her ''friend'' but to me you're her friend for all the wrong reasons, you're her friend in the hope that you will get back together not in the hope that you can help her in what she's going through.

You can't make someone love you or be with you and it's not right to try and deceive them into doing so, if she doesn't want to be with you then you have to accept that (for your own good) and leave her to get on with it and try and get on with your life. I know it hurts and I'm sorry you're going through this.
I understand. Thank you for your comment and what you said is completely reasonable, some of my girl friends (girl's sixth sense is better) feels that I should have leave it her alone until when she is fully recovered, she might think back or if only she misses me or needs me, she will find me. Well, we are still in 3 months temporary break at the moment, but in the situation now it looks dark and I just don't understand that why DP/DR will totally have emotional depletion or lost feelings, Before that when we were together, she did said that our relationship comes too fast, she worried that when relationship comes too fast, fades fast too. She also suspecting herself that whether is she doing the right decision on giving up her concerns and make into the relationship for the last final time as she is being hurted so deep by her ex 3 years ago, Well i don't know what is the reason behind still, what i know that i think i should try my best to move on while support her at the back, still we gonna meet next month for some water events with friends, and also going for Japan for vacation with a bunch of friends next year January (which our 3 months temporary break comes to an end soon and our birthday fell on the week we are at Japan.)

I didn't have time to respond to your pm the other day, but I'll have a stab at this now. She's hinted that she just wants to be friends many times in the conversation, and that she needs her space. It's important to read between the lines and understand this. If she doesn't reciprocate in certain ways and you notice that you're having to put in a lot of grunt work just to get her to engage with you on any meaningful level, then it's important that you draw your conclusions and do your best to move on. A girl who likes you will show interest and meet you halfway, it's as simple as that. So for now, assume she's not interested and do your own thing. She may just need to come around. I mean, none of us are mind readers, so we can't know for sure, but either way, for the sake of your own mental health, try not to become too attached to any one outcome. She may respect (and desire) you more if you back off and get on with your life.

So she may ultimately come back to you, she may not, but as someone who has been in a lot of relationships, I can say that for now, it doesn't look good. I've always loved women but when it comes to love, they're fickle as shit, and we dumb men just keep hammering away, hoping for definitive answers when there often just aren't any. So try to work on you, and that will put you in a better position for whatever comes next in your (love) life.
Thanks a lot Chicane. What you commented is completely correct too. That is why some of my friends trying to persuade me to move on, and then try not to contact her at all since she love her situation right now and don't need me at all, maybe in the future she might think back of the memories when she is fully recovered and somehow, I should try my best to move on, but at the same time, i'll wait her because love needs patience and some more we have just temporary break for not more than 1 month. Well way long to go until it draws to a conclusion.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Other viewers can please give me some suggestion too, I don't think she will lost her feelings in a sudden for so fast. :(
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
For now yes, but in the future will she realized back our love after fully recovered? :(
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
was she ever actually your girlfriend? finding it hard to believe if im honest
She is. I can confirmed she is, you can check through my blog for the whole story of her then you will understand for it.
 

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She is. I can confirmed she is, you can check through my blog for the whole story of her then you will understand for it.
without being harsh, and this is for my own experience

i think you're too attatched to her.

it happened to me and the girl i love had to block me off everything because i was so obsessed with "forcing" her to love me again after a breakup.

just let her come to you but make sure she knows you're there.
 

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without being harsh, and this is for my own experience

i think you're too attatched to her.

it happened to me and the girl i love had to block me off everything because i was so obsessed with "forcing" her to love me again after a breakup.

just let her come to you but make sure she knows you're there.
Yes. This is what I had found out recently when I look back our conversation how we be together and so on.

We just chat as a friend for a month and unofficially together, after two months officially together, after three months plus we already see each other families and relatives. She did admitted that everything was gone too fast and she is feeling insecure and worried i will run away and the relationship was way too fast and she could not completely have full trust on me yet i was saying i have my full trust on her, will wait her and so on that might makes her feeling stressful.

I guess she wanna have temporary break is to figure out herself, she might have no confident on our relationship. Especially when i said i'll wait her and be by her side that makes her feeling stressful and guilty because she doesn't want me to worried about her. I don't understand why she will deleted all the photos (whenever every photos that have me and her together especially Vietnam trip with her family). I think she must be facing through a lot of stress when she decided to have temporary break with me. Actually she had no confident on our relationship should be normal, I guess maybe she needs time to figure out herself, only she will feel comfortable and no guilty when she completely trust on me, maybe she wanna have a break just to figure out herself, or maybe wanna test my patience? The truth everyone of us don't know, only she knows.

But what i don't understand is how come the weird feeling in Cambodia trip have any relation to our relationship? Maybe her mind thinks too much? I am confused as nobody knows what is on her mind.

Akame, you said make sure she knows i am there? but the way she replied me in our conversation, she looks like she don't need me at all and many people who suggested me to not to keep in touch with her until she completely feeling better and finds me back one day? :(
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
With my situation right now, you guys think that should i send some motivation texts or morning texts to her once a few days? or do not keep in touch with her until she finds me? (Well we one week didn even contact/sending texts to each other & one month + didn meet each other)

Kindly please give me some suggestion guys. Please :(
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
Guys, I had been through another forum and one of the experts who gave me this suggestion after i wrote out my case there. Completely true but I still can't let go. :(

http://www.uncommonforum.com/viewtopic.php?t=94195

After read all these, I still can't let go of myself to her as I am still feeling that i have chances that she is just having anxiety and panic attack that makes emotion depletion. Anybody who experience this with relationship can help me with this? :(
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
haiz help me guys, im depressed.
 
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