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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My incessant talking
Is not what is keeping you around

It is your choice
And I have no control over the matter

My servitude
and politeness
are not the things making you love me
or preventing your anger


This holiday season, refuse to kiss the feet of someone who doesn't appreciate you enough. Family members included. It doesn't matter if they're 87 and crippled and out of it. If they're barking orders at you you don't bow down. You might like yourself more, because either way they probably won't care. Or, they might respect you more for not submitting to them.
 

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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
another thing, ESPECIALLY.

don't think that because someone else is weak (alcoholic, old, sick, grieving, etc)....don't think that they can't still make you mad and don't think you can't throw it back in their face.

Otherwise, if you are too nice, they will take advantage of you whether you know it or not. And the only result will be your mental hell.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
not terribly. more, thinking about family members who make petty demands and that weird subservient feeling i get when obeying them.

but the same applies for exes too :) while you're going out with them of course :)
 
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Melissa - ex-boyfriends suck, i say we put them all into a huge pile and light them on fire...

sometimes i think back to who i've dated and i'm like "what the fuck was I even thinking??"

nice poem though, sweets
 
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LOL. I myself have not had much success in the romance department, but I tend to blame myself for why everything always goes south. As a male dealing with females, I can say that both genders are capricious and overly sensitive. Such is the world we live in, I suppose.
 

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Keeping the anger always inside you is definitely bad for you (I don't know if this is on topic but I just had to tell this..) This Christmas Eve I went to see my friend. Her mother was pretty drunk. We were sitting at the table chatting, and at one point she started crying. She started talking about how difficult it is for her right now, having no job etc, feeling anxious and depressed etc. Anyway, having some experience on the last two, I tried to be understanding, told her a bit how I feel (she didn?t think anything could be wrong with me since I?m always ?happy and cheerful?, ) tried to show some empathy?then suddenly she starts talking about what an a** hole my father is. He was an a** twenty years ago and still is. Never even greets her. And that?s because he?s an arrogant, self-centered big shot town major who doesn?t care to notice little unemployed people like her. Hey, says my friend, it?s her father you?re talking about. So what, says the mother, I don?t care whose father he is, he?s still an a**hole. Heard he didn?t even move his own house. I don?t know what to do, so I just keep quiet and stare at the table. I mean, I don?t always get along with my father but it?s pretty rude from her to start moaning like that at my face. They barely know each other, my father has the eyesight of a bat, and it really was my father she was bitching about. I know she was drunk and it happens but it reminded me how I?ve always reacted in a situation like that, keep it all inside me and stare at the wall. And you can?t avoid difficult situations. So by the time I got out of high school, I was like a boiler waiting to explode.
 

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Hey Maria,

That was an interesting experience you described... "Didn't know what to do so I just stared at the wall." I know that one pretty well, esecially in regards to familial situations.

She was probably just venting because she was drunk. People who are drunk usually "mean" what they say, but they don't mean what they say, you know? It's like all that pent up energy, unconscious or whatever, is let out. Naturally, we hide it sober for a reason. So I'm sure while she was in fact opinionated about your father, and rightly so it sounds like, she probablly regreted the way she stated things in that state anyway.

But I enjoyed reading that little bit, and relate/feel for you.

~Jason
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
I'm reading in this one book ("The Disease to Please") that over-niceness is actually somewhat a form of Magical Thinking. Like, if you grew up being rewarded for nice behavior (even if it went against what you really felt) and overly punished for not-nice (or even honest!) behavior (and the punishments included things like teasing, physical violence, or being ignored), then you stand a chance to still believe that if you are always NICE then, by the way of magic, bad things won't happen to you. Not everybody goes through that but if you're a real people-pleaser this could actually be magical thinking at work.
 
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Kari said:
Melissa - ex-boyfriends suck, i say we put them all into a huge pile and light them on fire...

sometimes i think back to who i've dated and i'm like "what the f--- was I even thinking??"

nice poem though, sweets
If you light them all on fire, who is everyone else going to date???

Us guys have our share of g-freinds that could use a little fireplace action as well.... For every spurned woman, there is a disallostioned guy too!

S
 
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Melissa - ex-boyfriends suck, i say we put them all into a huge pile and light them on fire...

sometimes i think back to who i've dated and i'm like "what the f--- was I even thinking??"

nice poem though, sweets
I couldn't agree with ya anymore.
 
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