So right now please explain DP the best possible way you can, for me the best way i can explain it is when like your in the room alone and on your bed and get spooked and get in the covers and somehow it makes you feel safe like your under an armored blanket or something but i get that safe feeling with like a blanket over me and block my enviorment..thats the best way i can explain it but im glad to hear what you guys have to say..!
Explain DP
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DP feels like you are distant from your own self, from your own reality
It feels like you are in a bubble, a tight bubble, you feel flat, like you are not really alive
DP feels like a constant haze, like you are tripping, in a trance
It feels like you are in a bubble, a tight bubble, you feel flat, like you are not really alive
DP feels like a constant haze, like you are tripping, in a trance
It will vary for everyone to some degree.
For me it's a constant sensation of feeling drunk/drugged. I feel like I am removed from my body and mind. I can't properly process time, distance or my surroundings the way I used to. I have greatly impaired memory and concentration. I'm always tired and feel like I'm off-balance. My mind is forever wandering and never in the present moment. I can't focus on things properly, and can't absorb information such as reading long passages of text or following everyday conversations. I'm so absent-minded that I can say something and literally seconds later forget what I just said. If I go outside for a cigarette, I will come back in and don't really remember any of it happening. It's as if I am blacking out all throughout the day, and that life is just passing me by. Daily activities are difficult and even leisurely things don't feel the same. Walking around and doing basic things like going to the store are very draining, because I'm just sort of bumbling around in a fatigued, semi-dizzy state while my surroundings feel like an unfamiliar blur. It's as if I've been hit with a never-ending tranquilizer dart. Along with this, I developed what I call jelly legs, and have occasionally even gone through my knees, and have also passed out a couple of times.
My vision tends to swim, and I am prone to sensory overload when simply going to places like the supermarket and seeing all the various products lined up in the aisles, because my senses just perceive huge swaths of color and things I can't fully process. My sense of time is all off. I often lose time, and have no idea where certain hours/days/weeks went. I don't have a firm grasp of a chronology of events in my life. Something that happened earlier in the day will feel like it was a week ago - if I even remember it at all. Something that felt like it happened a week ago could've happened a month ago for all I know. It feels like I have a certain form of dementia, although logically I know I don't. However, I often worry that this is a precursor to it, because of how impaired I feel.
Heat, stress, physical overexertion, walking on uneven surfaces, fluorescent lighting and busy places with lots of people seem to exacerbate all of the above.
When I first came down with DP, I had excruciating anxiety. Quite simply the worst thing I've ever felt. Terrified and crying all day every day for no good reason. I developed migraines, major insomnia, and huge bouts of soul-crushing OCD as well. At one point I became suicidal and checked myself into hospital. That was when I got referred to an intensive outpatient program. The meds they gave me have kept these particular symptoms at bay, but the rest remain.
Ultimately I still don't understand this condition and struggle with it 24/7 as the symptoms I described in the first two paragraphs are constant and have been for years now. I don't understand the processes that are causing me to feel this way, and the lack of knowledge from anyone else regarding this condition is perhaps scariest of all.
For me it's a constant sensation of feeling drunk/drugged. I feel like I am removed from my body and mind. I can't properly process time, distance or my surroundings the way I used to. I have greatly impaired memory and concentration. I'm always tired and feel like I'm off-balance. My mind is forever wandering and never in the present moment. I can't focus on things properly, and can't absorb information such as reading long passages of text or following everyday conversations. I'm so absent-minded that I can say something and literally seconds later forget what I just said. If I go outside for a cigarette, I will come back in and don't really remember any of it happening. It's as if I am blacking out all throughout the day, and that life is just passing me by. Daily activities are difficult and even leisurely things don't feel the same. Walking around and doing basic things like going to the store are very draining, because I'm just sort of bumbling around in a fatigued, semi-dizzy state while my surroundings feel like an unfamiliar blur. It's as if I've been hit with a never-ending tranquilizer dart. Along with this, I developed what I call jelly legs, and have occasionally even gone through my knees, and have also passed out a couple of times.
My vision tends to swim, and I am prone to sensory overload when simply going to places like the supermarket and seeing all the various products lined up in the aisles, because my senses just perceive huge swaths of color and things I can't fully process. My sense of time is all off. I often lose time, and have no idea where certain hours/days/weeks went. I don't have a firm grasp of a chronology of events in my life. Something that happened earlier in the day will feel like it was a week ago - if I even remember it at all. Something that felt like it happened a week ago could've happened a month ago for all I know. It feels like I have a certain form of dementia, although logically I know I don't. However, I often worry that this is a precursor to it, because of how impaired I feel.
Heat, stress, physical overexertion, walking on uneven surfaces, fluorescent lighting and busy places with lots of people seem to exacerbate all of the above.
When I first came down with DP, I had excruciating anxiety. Quite simply the worst thing I've ever felt. Terrified and crying all day every day for no good reason. I developed migraines, major insomnia, and huge bouts of soul-crushing OCD as well. At one point I became suicidal and checked myself into hospital. That was when I got referred to an intensive outpatient program. The meds they gave me have kept these particular symptoms at bay, but the rest remain.
Ultimately I still don't understand this condition and struggle with it 24/7 as the symptoms I described in the first two paragraphs are constant and have been for years now. I don't understand the processes that are causing me to feel this way, and the lack of knowledge from anyone else regarding this condition is perhaps scariest of all.
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Mind cancer
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This should be pinned, hehe. Very well put explanation, 100% on point with how i feel with everything, scary how specific and good you are at typing and making it understandable. I love how you mentioned that heat, stress etc etc "exacerbate all of the above" - same thing here.
Btw have you had anything helping at all, not help to sleep better or anything like that, i mean specificly with DP? Do you work, if so - with what? Age, how long have you had it, where do you live. I'd be happy if you could anwser theese questions, hehe. What you typed could have been myself typing the exact same thing, it's so on point so im just intrested in your anwsers.
Realized i could see where you lived, age etc on your profile, but i'd appreciate getting the other questions anwsered <3
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DP comes in so many different formats. Lots of people have physical symptoms, lots of visual symptoms, lots of mostly mental symptoms and some have neither but simply feel strange and out of place somehow, so everyone's experience is gonna differ, especially depending on how they got it.
For me, DP feels most like a dream. It's as if I went to sleep and each day for nearly a thousand days now I've slowly waken up, but it's so slow that I can't feel it day to day. It's only after months and really years that I can look back and say I'm more awake than before.
DP, for me, is also a complete loss of the self. It's a deconstruction of mind, body and soul. It's as if I'm a compilation of flesh, mind and spirit, yet neither have any relation to the other and are functioning separately based on whatever task I'm attempting to tackle. Though I know who I am, I have not actually felt like an actual person since getting DP. It's sorta like the Pinocchio version of mental illness: You are a soul inside a body that doesn't feel like it belongs to you and all you want is to feel reconnected with what you know is your true self.
Though these emotions are difficult to cope with, by far the most frustrating symptoms I have are visual and cognitive. Visual snow, photophobia, palinopsia, macropsia and other cognitive malfunctions make it extremely difficult to function on a daily basis because it's as if I'm living in a never-ending psychedelic funhouse cartoon. I understand now that "reality" is simply a healthy mind, not a way the world actually exists independently of your perception of it.
The worst part of DP, as I see it, is not simply the lack of a "cure," but rather the lack of any sort of professionally sanctioned treatment, recognition, assessment testing or flat out acknowledgment that this condition exists and is mindbogglingly horrific and painful and nothing I'd with on anybody in the history of the world to deal with. How many "professionals" even know this exists? How many know what to do if it does? I just wish there was more movement in this regard. Far too many people have already suffered. I don't understand why, given our advances in technology, we can't at least some up with something to manage symptoms and improve lives.
For me, DP feels most like a dream. It's as if I went to sleep and each day for nearly a thousand days now I've slowly waken up, but it's so slow that I can't feel it day to day. It's only after months and really years that I can look back and say I'm more awake than before.
DP, for me, is also a complete loss of the self. It's a deconstruction of mind, body and soul. It's as if I'm a compilation of flesh, mind and spirit, yet neither have any relation to the other and are functioning separately based on whatever task I'm attempting to tackle. Though I know who I am, I have not actually felt like an actual person since getting DP. It's sorta like the Pinocchio version of mental illness: You are a soul inside a body that doesn't feel like it belongs to you and all you want is to feel reconnected with what you know is your true self.
Though these emotions are difficult to cope with, by far the most frustrating symptoms I have are visual and cognitive. Visual snow, photophobia, palinopsia, macropsia and other cognitive malfunctions make it extremely difficult to function on a daily basis because it's as if I'm living in a never-ending psychedelic funhouse cartoon. I understand now that "reality" is simply a healthy mind, not a way the world actually exists independently of your perception of it.
The worst part of DP, as I see it, is not simply the lack of a "cure," but rather the lack of any sort of professionally sanctioned treatment, recognition, assessment testing or flat out acknowledgment that this condition exists and is mindbogglingly horrific and painful and nothing I'd with on anybody in the history of the world to deal with. How many "professionals" even know this exists? How many know what to do if it does? I just wish there was more movement in this regard. Far too many people have already suffered. I don't understand why, given our advances in technology, we can't at least some up with something to manage symptoms and improve lives.
I'm glad it's relatable. Sometimes I type out longer posts like that on purpose because I know there are others out there who feel the exact same way. It can help to know they're not alone and that if need be, they can show text like that to others, to help them better understand what's going on if they don't have the words to describe it themselves.
Nothing I've tried has worked all that well. Activity and distraction help somewhat, but I think that's just a by-product of having your mind and body occupied by other things. And as I mentioned, performing the activities themselves are pretty difficult in the moment, so it's kind of a catch 22. The benzo and SSRI I am on help with anxiety/mood/sleep, but there's nothing out there that's formulated for DP specifically as far as I know. My psychiatrist has suggested I try an atypical antipsychotic though (Latuda) and I know there are some members here who have had luck with that. I've had DPDR for 3 and a half years.
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