Your being very selfish if you new the hell we go through you would put aside your bullshit and man up and give her some space !!
Thank you. But i am get suffering day by day.Alfred, I understand the way you must be feeling. It sucks to think the person you love doesn't want to be with you anymore, and I'm sure many people here can agree with me
But here's the hard part Alfred. Sometimes you have to let go. Give her space. Give her the time to rest and come back to normal. The pushing you are doing may be stressing her and delaying her recovery. Let me tell you this, everything will be okay. If she doesn't come back there's so many people out there its ridiculous. PM me sometime if you have to talk bud.
You're completely wrong, she's being selfish by not telling him what's happening.Your being very selfish if you new the hell we go through you would put aside your bullshit and man up and give her some space !!
You are wrong too. I am the first one that she tell me what happened to her when she get suspected anxiety/panic attacks, but she does not admit it. Now it was too late for everything as she lost feeling to me in a sudden.You're completely wrong, she's being selfish by not telling him what's happening.
She told me she is getting better and wanted to remain this. But then she still insist to delete all the comments and likes from her to me, she purposely go into my profile like fb, insta, wechat. I don't understand why, and she seems like so happy after break up which is so not her. Normally a person just break up just about 1 month, at least will be sad and so on, but she seems so normal and this is so different. This sunday i am going to slide the city (water activities) with her and friends. My friends will try to persuade her to see whether we can have a talk or not. I hope she will be willing to listen to us, and i would tell her after i have asked everything, i give her all the spaces she wants. If possible i will try to consult her to go for psychologist, eventhough it might be impossible. I already give her some space for one month but its getting worst and worst by deleting everything, this is so abnormal whereas every couple that loved each other so deep before, will not did it that early somemore we are still in temporary break.You need to give her space.... I know you don't want to hear that, but smothering someone too much is probably one of the worst things you could do.
take it day by day, give her some space and see how things turn out.
So you think there is a chance? I just want an honest answer from her that what caused dp/dr, i am willing to bring for psychologist if she is ok. But hopefully everything will be alright and fine. Hope she will listen to me.Sorry for the harsh and less than helpful responses, but honestly, I would not be able to give my best friend relationship advice in my current state. While your gf may be having DP/DR, and may want a break (which must be painful and confusing for you), we are not fit to mediate or advise you.
I can say it is feasible to want a break as a young female going through an accute mental health problem. As a young female, the dating market favors them, so they can afford more risks. As someone suffering with DP/DR acutely, I would not want the responsibility of a relationship. I wouldn't start one unless my health was moderately acceptable either, but that's okay.
Try not to despair. As you get older 1.) the tables turn in your favor, and 2.) hopefully more people are feeling mentally well. Maybe, if you don't let the stress of this break break you, there is a chance. Try changing your role, since circumstances have changed.
Well, yesterday we went to the water activities. She seems ok but less interaction with me as before, I do started the topic with her, just a little bit of chit chat. But could not get to ask her as I don't want to spoiled her playing mood, but it seems like she don't really enjoy eventhough she is with her cousins all the time, I can feel she is lack of happiness, even one of her closest friend, feels that their interactions are not as good as before anymore.I understand the pain. I was in a very fulfilling relationship except for the fact that both of our mental health issues got in the way. It's rough when it comes apart.
Firstly, Thank you so much for your reply. I am very sorry for my behaviour in the post but i am feeling helpless.Alfred, you sound completely obsessive. I don't mean to sound rude because believe me I have been obsessive in the past over people and so have millions of other people on the planet but looking at this as an outsider do you think this obsessiveness is maybe what's driving her away even more? or may be part of the reason why your relationship hasn't worked out? it can't all just be down to her, if you're like this out of the relationship then how were you in the relationship?. I mean you've joined a forum, wrote countless posts about her and even dedicated a blog to this girl - to me that is definitely over the top/bordering on obsessive.
Your ''relationship'' or your love for this girl to me seems like it's based on obsession/posession and not a genuine appreciation for her as a person.
There is a huge difference between real genuine love/relationships and fixation (though sometimes it feels like there isn't). Real love that you claim to feel is effortless, you don't need a title such as boyfriend or girlfriend from this person, you don't need to posses them, it means you simply enjoy the fact that they're in your life, you don't need them rather you just enjoy them. That doesn't mean to say you don't try in the relationship, have to agree on everything or don't make compromises to keep things working but overall it is effortless and this person enhances your life rather than complicating it.
Fixation as you can see/what screams out to me in your posts is not pleasant, it makes you feel like you're going to die, it makes you feel like you will never be OK again if you don't have this person, it feels like your heart is going to fall out of your bumhole everytime you think of them, it is stressful, it is probably one of the worst feelings I have felt (apart from dp/anxiety but I feel it's deffo up there).
I feel like your idea on what a relationship/real love are is completely skewed. A relationship isn't a possession like a car or a house, a relationship isn't a thing at all. A relationship is an interaction you are having with that person and the general tone of your interactions on a whole. Relationships are living and experienced in the moment.
REAL genuine relationships/love aren't created by trying to make someone do what you want them to do because you have a black hole inside of you.