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Every time i start to feel better, i try to quit klonopin

497 Views 2 Replies 2 Participants Last post by  person3
And it comes back 100 percent, to the point i think im going crazy, gonna be in an insane asylum, and can't escape my head, full on panic.

I've done most of the things recommended by great people on this site, and i have improved dramatically. I think that you really have to sit down and reflect, and notice how much you have improved. The improvement steps are so small and unnoticible (baby steps), that many probably don't notice that they have improved. So even when i have a horrible day (like today), it doesn't set me back all the way back to where i started, even though it feels like it.
I've tried every natural method under the sun to beat this ( you should see my vitamin/supplement cabinent). I am beginning to believe that some serious mental illnesses can't just be beat with will power (tom cruise, lol).
I could possibly have a huge serotonin deficiency that can not be corrected with natural means, including CBT. I have a enormous genetic line of mental illness from my fathers side, and i garauntee you that most could not have been helped by CBT and yoga and meditation (which i love).
I hate pills, and i hate the pharm companies, i hate the impersonality of pdocs, and a dislike for most western medicine, but these pills might be necissary for SOME (i know janine kicked it and is off meds, great for her, but might not be a possibility for all)

And guess what people. I'M A STUDENT AT A NATUROPATHIC COLLEGE!!!!! But you gotta be able to combined philosophies and include different methods.

Is this a big rant for a justification of me getting back on an SSRI/benzo? Perhaps.
I shouldn't need one. I developed horrible panic disorder when i was 19, had no idea what it was. Took paxil and went away for 4 years, til the huge breakthrough and the beginning of DR. I can honestly say that Paxil saved my life. Now, it doesn't seem to do much anymore.

Feedback, lol, thanks for listening.
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It seems to me like you're trying to "master" this whole thing. Once you get better you're going "see? I don't need these stupid meds." Well, for right now, you do need the "stupid meds" if you're falling apart every time you stop them. You don't really have a choice, this isn't about philosophical beliefs or convictions...it's this: You're sick. You need to take something to get better. Keep taking it until you are better and even when you are better. The real cure comes from psychological changes in yourself, not from manipulating the meds. But you need the meds to ease the symptoms for now. Don't start and stop.
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