So, I went ahead and started a blog, but that's rather obvious. You know, I've never actually joined a community that wasn't something stupid and nerdy, where discussing mental health is the prime function. And that's actually pretty nice.
Today has been really hard. The nights are always easier, and I was feeling almost normal earlier, but now it's starting to come back. Not at the same strength, though. I took some of the advice given on here, and it's going to have to start working soon.
I go to my therapist on Friday, which is nice. I can start working out my issues with death and start grieving properly, instead of internalizing everything. Maybe it'll start getting easier to get better, back to myself. I feel really nice tonight. Earlier, my head was actually completely clear for, I'd say, a few moments. It felt nice.
I've lost about ten pounds from not eating, though. I've completely lost my appetite for most of the day, but during the night, I crave actual food. So.
I've made a habit of showering every day a bit after I wake up. Most of the time, I don't feel like moving. I'm going to have so much work to do after this in school. Fuck.
Anyway, I'm not out of this yet. I'm making my way. Bumping my dose up to the full 20mg.
So, yeah. We'll see how this goes. I hope I'm out of it soon.
Also, if there's one thing I can say about DP/DR that's good besides, well, nothing, is that I can go up to people and talk without fear because I'm emotionally numb in public and literally just don't give a shit. That's nice.