[Guest]

i don't even know what to type right now

the hopelessness just gets worse everyday..... And other things seem to be falling apart as well. I live in an environment of stress. Family stress, social stress, shit even the things I enjoy are becomming stressful.........

i just wanna give up

im close to it

 

[bat]

you can't give up you havn't visited ireland yet.

seriously though soul, i still think you need to find a way out of your present environment. go somewhere that's not giving you stress for a bit to give yourself a break

 

[Guest]

Please don't

 

[maria]

just don't do it! If dp/dr:s nature's perverse way to tell you that you need to change, then when you change, also dp/dr becomes needless. And you don't have to carry all world's trouble in your shoulders. Give life a chance to prove it's more than a hairway to steven!

 

[Guest]

dude, i know things seem all pointless and stuff but just don't give up....like pdr said give yourself a break and some thinkin' time 2 get things a bit more in perspective and how to make things bit more easier....

 

[Kelson12]

SB,

I don't even have to explain my situation to you, as you know it oh so well. I am doing really bad right now too. Just feel very detached and very depressed. I just want that depression to lift and want to actually "feel" like doing things. I was feeling "good" for three weeks, two weeks ago. I have thought about ending it too lately. Trust me. I think that "If I can't enjoy things and WANT to be alive, then why should I be alive?" I guess the only answer is, What if it does go away? You'll never know if you end it yourself. Dogg, I've been fighting this for nearly 4 years. That's ALOT longer than the 15 months you've been dealing with it. And there are people on here that have been dealing with it alot longer. Not that that makes you feel any better, but just trying to make a point.
As far as the girlfriend thing. You know I can relate on that. But honestly, as depressed and "out-of-it" that I am right now, I really have NO desire to meet anyone, because I just don't feel excited about it, so I don't even want to give it a try. And I am 25. You are only 19 (right, 19?). You have PLENTY of time to find someone. Heck, I'm still young as well. But yes, that is one thing I have thought alot about..."Why do I not have any appeal for life, girls, basketball, my family, etc.?" And I guess it is because I am so depressed. But if I have been on different meds over the last 4 years, then why am I still depressed? And why did I feel so good from April-August of last year? Shit, makes no sense. Everytime I start feeling depressed again, I always think "It is so much worse this time around!" But honestly, I don't think that its worse, I just think that going back down again after feeling good for three weeks, makes it seem worse and I ruminate ALOT more.

SB...just hang in there man. I'm hurting right there with you as is everyone else. We have a disease, all with different reasons why we feel this way. But we all have a disease. Just hang in there man. I know you aren't very happy with where your life is at the moment, but its just something you are going to have to accept. Suicide is not the answer. It may SOUND like the answer. But its not. You may think it will solve things, but it will not. Trust me. I'll holla at you 2night. Peace.

Kelson

 

[Guest]

Soul,

All I can say is Kelson gave some pretty damn good advice. Buddy, I know how you feel. If you don't believe me, just read some of my posts.

AT LEAST you are not a delusional crackpot like myself who is terrorized that the world isn't real, and other crazy crap like that. Man, you are smart, and seem to have a level head. Most of this stuff is common sense. Only other thing I can add is that you just have to ride this sh*t out. It sucks big time, BUT, there is a way out.

Just be glad you are not delusional. Don't think it could be worse? It can get a lot worse...

Hang in there, do everything you can to take your mind off this crap. Fight, and fight hard. Don't fight your feelings, fight your temptation to take your emotional temperature, to stop and say "Man, I feel so gone, so down, like I don't want to go on anymore, etc." You might want to keep doing this, but try your hardest not to. You can't change the way you feel, but you can stop yourself from making things worse. Just keep going, like a robot, like a pimp machine on the illest crunk juice out there. Keep on trucking, and things will get better.

Best,

Jon

 

[Guest]

what Kelson and gstile said.

 

[Guest]

your not gonna kill yourself, if your serious about killin yourself you wouldnt be tellin everyone, your just seeking attention

 

[Guest]

Suffering is better than ending it all. The chances of you sufering for a lifetime are slim to none. Your brain is too smart and will continue to seek out solutions until it finds something that will get you through the day. I have a few ?'s for you soulbrotha. How long have you felt this degree of hopelessness? Why are things so stressful? How much klonopin do you take per day. I know you know that i'm anti benzo, but klonopin is documented to cause depression since it's a depressant. However, you may have felt like this before, so that's just a slight possibility.

 

[Kelson12]

your not gonna kill yourself, if your serious about killin yourself you wouldnt be tellin everyone, your just seeking attention

If this was meant to be sarcastic and a low bloiw to SB, you're an asshole. Simple as that. And you can quote me on that. If he really wanted alot of attention, he'd just post:

Johnny_Utah is the lamest mf'er on this board.

At least he'd be telling the truth, where as, you sure aren't. Grow up.

Peace.

Kelson

 

[Guest]

your not gonna kill yourself, if your serious about killin yourself you wouldnt be tellin everyone, your just seeking attention

If this was meant to be sarcastic and a low bloiw to SB, you're an asshole. Simple as that. And you can quote me on that. If he really wanted alot of attention, he'd just post:

Johnny_Utah is the lamest mf'er on this board.

At least he'd be telling the truth, where as, you sure aren't. Grow up.

Peace.

Kelson

Its not meant to be sarcastic dumbass its the truth

 

[gem]

Johnny Utah, when someone is coming on this site to express that they are feeling so bad that they want to give up on life then i truly feel we as fellow human beings need to listen and try and help. When I read a post such as this I feel deeply sorry that the person is suffering so bad. It hurts deeply to be in this illness and it hurts to feel that nothing around you makes you feel happy anymore. It is times like this when we fall down and we feel like we cannot get up that we reach out our hand and help lift up another human being. You state that he just wants attention, he is not looking for attention for pity he is looking for maybe a kind word that will help him get through the day. He comes here to feel a part of something when he feels like he a part of nothing right now. We all know how that feels, we all know how lost we can feel and how painful and sad we can become. I am very surprised that you suffering with the same illness would not be more understanding. We as human beings yes do need attention and yes we need lots of it. Attention means being apart of something and this is the right place for him to come to. We all care here because we all know what it is like to feel like your climbing a mountain that has no peak. Soulbrotha I am sorry you feel so down and I wish I knew the right words to say to you. Maybe this will help a little, never give up please, sometimes when we feel like we just cannot do this remember that tomorrow life could completely change, it could be better than today if you give up you will never know.

Johnny please I am not trying to be unkind but please remember how painful this illness is.

gem.

 

[Guest]

i mean if your gonna kill yourself just do it , dont announce it to the rest of the board. Im sorry i just dont have respect for these kind of people take it or leave it i dont care really

 

[Kelson12]

whatever....I very much doubt SB is talking about ending his life just to get attention. I talk to him all the time and he is not the type of person who posts on this board for attention.

Dumbass, huh? Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. Don't get me started. I'll just be cool and end it there.

Peace.

Kelson

 

[Guest]

whatever....I very much doubt SB is talking about ending his life just to get attention. I talk to him all the time and he is not the type of person who posts on this board for attention.

Dumbass, huh? Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. Don't get me started. I'll just be cool and end it there.

Peace.

Kelson

ok i respect you for that

 

[Kelson12]

i mean if your gonna kill yourself just do it , dont announce it to the rest of the board. Im sorry i just dont have respect for these kind of people take it or leave it i dont care really

Then don't reply to the damn post then. Seems easy to me.

Dumbass....hahaha....right.

Peace.

Kelson

 

[gem]

I am sorry I forgot something else I was going to say, Johnny_Utah, you state that if someone tells others they are going to kill themself that they won't do it, you are wrong.

gem.

 

[Guest]

I am sorry I forgot something else I was going to say, Johnny_Utah, you state that if someone tells others they are going to kill themself that they won't do it, you are wrong.

gem.

maybe not all the time but its usually the case, right before suicide a person wont go and tell everyone about killing himself then sit back read the reply's

 

[gem]

Johnny_Utah, I am asking you nicely to respond no more to this post. Your words are very hurtful and it is not what this site is about.

gem.