Another interesting one.. I stopped the CBD fyi as I believe it was numbing emotions which I don't think is helpful to recovery.. It also stopped dreaming, which I think it involved in subconsciously processing emotions.
"Changes in [11C]raclopride BP in the ventral striatum correlated with depersonalization associated with euphoria"... unsure about the 'euphoria' part and also this is an old study. But basically the study showed Psilocybin (magic mushrooms) to increase activity in the basal ganglia which from this recent DTI study (start of this post) is what is needed in DPD.. The other issue is this was a study to induce psychosis, however the definition of psychosis is quite broad. Derealization could be seen as a psychosis as there is loss of touch with reality- so to me that isn't as scary as it sounds. I am assuming none of these patients developed psychosis but don't know that.
Again the dangers are real and I am going to be careful when I take this.. I will be stepping it up gradually taking 3 days off after each dose. If my intuition tells me to stop then I will. My belief is that when people take shrooms to have a good trip and are then faced with a horrific truth about themselves/their past, they reject this which may lead to psychosis.. In most situations if people want a 'good trip' they are at a party/festival etc and in no situation to be processing emotional trauma. I have no evidence for this, hence why I am taking baby steps. If I start to develop signs of psychosis then obviously I will stop.
The other thing is I am going into this EXPECTING a bad trip.. I am expecting to have to face ugly truths about myself. I already know the worst of it, I am not going into my life story here but I had a truly horrific childhood. So I am expecting to have to face that. I have tried to connect to those memories emotional through the focusing technique (gendlin), meditation, therapy and TRE... nothing has helped me to connect to them. So I appreciate and understand the risk but am prepared as I can be to 'let go' when shit hits the fan, not fight it or try and deny the truth