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Hi,

So after having searched on the old topics I haven't found anything about this. I developed ocd a few years after I had gotten Ddd. A little background story: I got Ddd without knowing what it was and I freaked out. I totally felt and feel I had lost myself, I feel emotionally numb, time is abstract, everything is there. But I didn't know what it was. I searched for help without getting it because the psychiatrists didn't know what it was. And a lot of my problems surrounded who "I" am. Because I didn't feel like I knew/ know anymore. And it was especially painful around friends and family, because I wanted to be the old person I had been to them but now I didn't know anymore. So, then came ocd. I'm not going to analyze why that could have happened. But eventually my ocd/ compulsions evolved around doing things to become "me". I understand how weird this sounds, but it still feels like I have to do this things to become "me".

Is this just ocd? But who am I now then (with Ddd)?

(I understand this is weird but hearing your thoughts would help a lot.) Thanks
 
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