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Some people here mention moments in their 5, 10, 15, etc year battle with dp/dr and mention some moments of clarity of being dp free. Can you all elaborate on this. I have a few. I'll tell you one.
I had been having panic attacks for about 6 months. I was deep in panic disorder and agoraphobia and dp. I had quit driving so I was in the middle of trying to expose myself to driving further and further distances. One night I went out for one of my short "practice" drives. (I usually went at night because there was no traffic). Well I drove about a mile down the road (this was far for me at the time), and I started getting panicky. I started getting foggy and thought I was gonna have a panic attack so I turned around and drove home really quickly. Well, when I got home I was pissed. Pissed at this disorder, pissed at myself for being weak, pissed at the world. I was so mad. I pulled into the driveway and just layed my head on the steering wheel and closed my eyes in the quiet darkness and just fumed. When I finally sat up and got out of the car, everything looked completely normal. For the first time in 6 months. Everything was really clear and comfortable. I stared into the night and looked around up at the stars and felt good, for once. I knew the feeling would pass. As I walked inside I didn't force myself to hold on to the moment (knowing that I couldn't hold on to the moment) but definitely was thinking about dp and of course it came back.
I'm nowhere near as bad as I was then. But I remember how bad off I was and how scary it was. But at the moment I was for once more angry than scared and I think that emotion overruled the fear. And it felt good.
 
G

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Anger is one thing that can pull me up out of DP. That state of mind has the effect of centering me for some reason. I presume that's because it is one of the more "primitive" emotions. Basic, and relatively simple.
Unfortunately, I usually feel even more DP'ed after the anger passes.
And..........I don't particularly enjoy being angry.
 
G

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I started getting foggy and thought I was gonna have a panic attack.
Here's you evidence.
As soon as you notice any level of variance in sensations (increase or decrease), it's some kind of proof that you're not 100% dp/dr all day, which might suggest that you have the power to vary the level down to a copeable level, or even further down to a level where you can lead a normal life.
 

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engirl i do the driving thing too, i cant get right far on my own and feel really pathetic for it, i seem to drive a little way and start getting really jittery, luckily the car an automatic so i keep one hand on the wheel and twiddle with my hair with the other, dont know why this helps, i presume its because i can feel something, but i wish i could experience them dp/dr free moments :( i could right do with a break from all these symptoms and feel like i have a purpose
 

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A few hours after I discovered this community forum, all feelings of DP/DR dissipated for maybe 6 to 8 hours. It was wonderful. By trying to hold on to the feelings of being DP/DR, I'm convinced that's precisely why I was launched right back into full-scale DP/DR.

Makes me wonder how much my condition is psychological vs. physiological. If, after reading the posts here, and finding some level of comfort in the fact that others can relate to what I'm experiencing, that's a pretty good indication my DP/DR is largely psycholgically-driven.

Best Wishes,

Jeff
 

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That amazes me, as my DP/DR is completely chronic, at one flat level, 24/7, in my dreams as well. I used to have "clear spaces" and they were I'd say always in the evening. Sometimes after I'd accomplished something, been in a play and it was over.

The most dramatic time was when I finished grad school and was driving to a party after our final "film festival". I felt such RELIEF. It had been so difficult to accomplish, and there was a "weight" lifting off of my shoulders, and I looked out the window and saw warmth and clarity in the lights inside the houses I passed, buildings.

I used to have these "clear spaces" up through college, in the evenings... well at sunset. Sadly they don't happen anymore.

I do believe there is clearly a psychological component, but the symptom itself is that there is something "not functioning properly" with our ability to dissociate.

I don't think we can separate the psychological from the neurological. But I can see how less stress, or the RELEASE of stress (and that can happen with anger, tears, or even laughter) has in the past given me some moments of clarity.

I would give someone my right arm to feel that again.

For those who are able to find that, I agree, don't try to hold onto it, just let it happen.

Excellent!
Best,
D :shock:
 

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Yes, release, I had one "clear space" after I'd taken care of the death of my cat. Had to put my old pal to sleep. After that horrible day was over, I lay on my pillow, felt this "bliss" again, and all the yammering in my head STOPPED. That lasted about 5 minutes.

Also, a male friend came to visit me, stayed with me over a holiday and cooked for me -- I love having a personal chef :) -- we were in the grocery, and I was using the ATM machine. I think I was thinking how nice it was that he was helping me, CARING FOR me by checking the groceries out at the U-Check line, LOL. I hate the U-Check thing.

I was just taking money out of the ATM, and maybe even smiling that this guy was "taking care of a guy-thing" for me, and carrying the groceries, and a warm, beautiful moment of reality opened up, again for maybe 5 mintues maximum, if that long.

I think at all of these times, my anxiety level (whether I feel it or not) lowered. When that wall went down, so did the DP/DR wall.

I've been more and more afraid of my future recently, and it is so hard to "let go" of all the fears I have.

It's both psychological AND physiological for a good number of us IMHO. Man it's so frustrating.

L,
D :shock:
 
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