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DP/DR from Meditation?

6319 Views 11 Replies 6 Participants Last post by  Charger
Anyone get DP/DR from meditation?

I got mine from a Vippashina mediation retreat. I did the retreat in the hope that it would help with my insomnia and anxiety due to financial problems. Here are some words I wrote after the retreat. This I wrote before I knew about DP/DR:

Within this words I will try to describe my feelings and perceptions after I returned from a retreat where I only completed three out of the ten days. I left late afternoon on the third day due to intense feelings of fear, anxiety and a perception of non reality. These feelings started late in the evening on the first day a varied in intensity during the next couple of days. On the third day I couldn?t take it any longer and left the retreat.

After returning home I noticed that the feelings still persisted although they did vary in intensity from just being perceivable to a point where my whole body felt like it would implode. The feelings I?m referring to are of fear, anxiety, panic, confusion, loneliness, weirdness, strangeness, unreality, detachment, depression and also a strong sense of not feeling like my usual self. I also discovered that I could trigger these feelings and change the intensity of the feelings by slightly shifting my awareness or focus on either my body, thoughts or surroundings. This shift in awareness would dramatically change the perception of my reality. The feelings I most dislike are feelings of intense and uncontrollable fear, anxiety and unrealism which makes me feel very distant and not like my familiar self. When I refer to my body and thoughts I?m referring to normal everyday functions that we perform thousands of times a day like walking, talking, thinking, observing etc.; but this slight shift in awareness has a profound effect on my whole perception of these familiar phenomenons.

Anyone with a similar experience?
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Drugs were involved for me, but I think I wouldn't have ever got stuck so deep without meditation. Your experiences sound quite similar to mine.

There are so many different forms and states of meditation that I don't think you can label it all good or all bad. And I think if in doubt, avoid it altogether. I can't help meditating though, and sometimes I feel like it helps, and sometimes like it makes things worse. When the world completely collapses then I find heading straight into it transforms the experience into a good one, but a worryingly intense one that can leave me feeling quite light for a few days. It's tricky to know what the healthiest thing to do is in the long run.
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